


Trials and Tribulation

by nans56



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst, Blood and Injury, F/M, Humor, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-14 00:02:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 59,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18041591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nans56/pseuds/nans56
Summary: She simply took his breath away in that moment, a quick visceral punch to the gut that left him a little breathless and deeply intrigued. He did not realize he was staring until she turned and looked right at him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story I have wanted to write about Leo. I wanted the freedom of a new character for him to fall in love with so I could play more with Leo and all the possibilities. This is definitely A/U but as close to canon as possible without being hog-tied by it.

Trials & Tribulations

AU, Leo McGarry, Nan Gray (New Character) and the rest of the ensemble.

Disclaimer: I don’t own them, Sorkin does, I am just borrowing them for a bit.  
This will have mature/adult moments and I will indicate chapters where this occurs.

CHAPTER I

Leo McGarry pulled the cap on his head down over his sunglasses as he pushed open the lobby door and walked outside. He sauntered down the steps to the sidewalk, turned left and walked the short block to the corner. He was trailed by two Secret Service agents, one who crossed the street with him, while the other moved over to take up a spot on the bench at the corner. The second agent continued on across 22nd St. while Leo entered his favorite coffee shop.  
“The usual,” he said as he tucked his book under his arm and dug out his wallet to pay for his cappuccino. He always got his coffee in the big ceramic cups they offered. It just felt a little nicer to sip out of a real cup instead of paper. He swallowed coffee half the day at work from the slightly fuzzy paper cups they kept stacked next to the coffee maker in the bullpen, so on his Sunday visit to his favorite coffee shop, he treated himself.  
“Here’s your change, Mr. McGarry,” the girl behind the counter said as she dropped a few bills and coins into his hand.  
Leo’s head snapped up as he looked at her. “Liz? Uh, how…”  
Liz leaned in a little and spoke softly. “I am a Poly-Sci junior at Georgetown, sir. Even with the glasses and the cap, I recognized your voice. I have listened to more than a few of your public speeches and comments. You know, school. Don’t worry. No one else realizes. Your secret is safe with me.”  
“Thanks, Liz. I, ah, ‘preciate it.”  
Liz just nodded and started to speak to the customer at the next register. Leo was forgotten. He wandered over to the pick-up station, grabbed his cup on a saucer and wandered outside to his preferred table by the concrete planter next to the pillar close to the street. He placed his cup and saucer on the metal table and settled into the chair. He saw his agent Lewis settle onto a picnic bench across the street at a small take out. He had a coke in his hand. He looked up and down the street and very slightly nodded. Leo looked left and saw his second agent across 22nd Street on the bench partially hidden behind a paper. All was well, so Leo scrunched down in his seat, pulled out his paperback copy of Yeats Collected Poems and sipped his coffee. He read his book slowly, savoring the words, the meanings, the images the poems invoke in his imagination. This time was for him. For reflection, for peace and quiet, for escape. As much as he lived for his work, he had come to really cherish this new time he had begun to carve out for himself. He absently picked up his cup, took a long sip and set it back down on the table as he licked the foam from his upper lip. He uncrossed his legs only to re-cross them the opposite way, scrunched down further in the chair, weight on his left hip and continued reading.  
Sometime later, was it minutes or hours, he lifted his head when a lovely, lilting laugh invaded his solitude. He looked around and at a table near the door he saw a woman of indeterminate age and a man clearly in his 70’s seated before a portable chess set, each with a mug of coffee. He had said something that caused her to lean back and throw her head back in laughter. Sweet, clear laughter. She touched her throat with one slender, long-fingered hand. Her barely shoulder length red-gold accented brown hair was swept back from her face, her mouth was wide open, and her eyes were crinkled in the corners. Her eyes twinkled as she brought her head back down to look at her companion. She was slender, but not skinny and Leo thought she might be in her late thirties despite the fact that she was dressed in faded jeans with the knees out, flip flops and a Red Hot Chili Peppers t-shirt.  
She simply took his breath away in that moment; a quick visceral punch to the gut that left him a little breathless and deeply intrigued. He did not realize he was staring until she turned and looked right at him. He quickly dropped his eyes to the book in his lap and gulped. ‘Holy cow, she is lovely.’  
His coffee cup was empty. ‘I should go get a refill. I can pass right by her.’ He slowly lifted his head and out of the corner of his eye he noticed that the woman and her companion were gone, yet the chess set was still sitting on the table along with a cloth tote on the back of her chair. He then saw her inside the shop at the counter getting another cup of coffee. He looked back down at this book and sighed and then lifted his head again when he saw someone moving up to the vacated table from the sidewalk alongside the shop.  
Leo stood up and took a few steps toward the table. “The lady is inside. She will be right back,” Leo said and the man who had been reaching toward the tote pulled back his hand and quickly walked away. Leo sat back down fully facing the shop now and bent his head back to the book he really cared little for now. It was just a prop in his hands. He kept his head down and was startled a few minutes later when a ceramic cappuccino cup plunked down on the table by his elbow. The foam on top had a smiley face on it and he looked up into the smiling face of the chess woman.  
Leo tilted his head to the side in question. “For saving and guarding my belongings. Thank you,” she answered in a slightly husky and soft alto voice. Leo’s heart skipped a beat and she turned away and went back to her table before Leo could close his open mouth. His gaze was drawn to the right where he saw his second agent, Cruze, standing near her table by the sidewalk. Cruze raised an eyebrow and Leo imperceptibly nodded his head letting Cruze now all was fine.  
When he looked again the woman was packing up her chess set and shouldering her tote. She picked up her coffee mug and instead of leaving as he expected, she moved to Leo’s table and pulled up the chair next to his. She dropped her tote on the back of the chair and sat down, knocking into Leo’s knees as she turned her legs under the table, forcing him to sit up straight and pull back his legs.  
“Hi,” she said simply. “Do you come here often?”  
Caught totally off guard by the question Leo broke out in a laugh. “Hi. Isn’t that my line?”  
She laughs. “I like to mix things up – be unpredictable.”  
“Really.”  
“Yeah. What about you?”  
“What,” Leo asks with a tilt of his head?  
“Are you unpredictable?”  
Leo’s head was spinning. He thought for a long moment and with a wry grin said, “No.”  
She tilted her head in the opposite direction, still keeping eye contact with him. In fact, he notices, she has never broken eye contact since she sat down. “No? Nah, I bet you are. Controlled, but unpredictable. ”  
He shrugged his shoulders.  
“So?”  
“What?”  
She smiled. It lit her face. He then noticed the fine lines at the corners of her eyes and mouth. There was a vein of silvery hair at her left temple. He noticed she is beautiful. She is older than he thought. Mature. Self-possessed. “Do you come here often?”  
Leo paused again. “Yeah. Do you?”  
“I come to play chess. I visit several different places.”  
“Why?”  
“Why come to a coffee shop to play chess?”  
Leo nodded.  
“I only have the time on Sundays, and I, uh. Well…” she trailed off.  
“I get it. Are you good?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Why chess?”  
“Ah. Why chess. Because it is intriguing. It is about so many things. It is so many things. It is about gain and loss, it is foresight and intuition and insight. Chess is about pursuing perfection. It is logical, a progression, it’s deep. It’s consuming…but also ‘unpredictable.’ She smiles. “You play someone and at first it is classic play by play, move by move. And you wonder. Is this it or is this someone across the table an opponent who can surprise you, wow you, send you scrambling to defend or lure you into offense, leave you breathless at the ingenuity of their move.” She is leaning forward, toward him, her eyes locked on his, her breath quickened as she described her love of chess.  
Leo smiled. “I know someone who would love to play chess with you.”  
“Not you?”  
“I have a feeling I would get my ass kicked.”  
Leo could not help but laugh with her when she leaned back in delight.  
“So why do you come, to the coffee shop?”  
“Sundays. My day off, not always. I read, I have a couple cappuccinos. I usually stay a couple of hours, and then I go home.”  
“Alone?”  
He pulled back, just a bit, and shrugged.  
“I cook dinner. Work a little if I need to. Watch TV.”  
“Do you like to cook?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Me too. Are you a chef or a cook?”  
He laughed. “A simple cook.”  
“Do you make bread? Can you make pasta? Do you make pasta?”  
“Both. But not often.”  
“You are a chef.”  
“Humph.”  
“So, what are you reading,” she asked as she took a sip of her coffee?  
“Yeats. Collected works.”  
Her left eyebrow quirked up in a way he realized he found delightful. “Really.”  
“Yeah.”  
She paused a moment. “The trees are in their autumn beauty, the woodland paths are dry, Under the October twilight the water Mirrors a still sky;” she quotes as she steeples her hands together. Leo noticed her hands were unadorned, but a simple battered silver bangle circled her left wrist.  
“Upon the brimming water among the stones, Are nine and fifty swans.” Leo finished the stanza she had begun.  
“I am impressed. The ‘Wild Swans at Coole’ is one of my favorites.”  
“Don’t be,’ she grinned.  
Leo leaned forward slightly and stage whispered, “Impressed? For someone so young to have a command of Yeats.”  
“Ha. Don’t be fooled. I am older than I look. Good genes, “she leaned forward too and stage whispered back.  
“Really,” Leo said as he held his hand to his chest, feigning disbelief.  
“Stop. You’ll inflate my ego.”  
Leo tilted his head. “I don’t think you have an ego. I think you don’t need one.”  
She tilted her head imitating him and appraising him.  
“Perceptive. I like a perceptive man – saves trouble. And time.”  
“Are you FBI,” she asked?  
Leo laughed at the abrupt change of topic. “No.”  
“Why the hat?”  
“I like the hat.”  
“Do you fly?”  
He cocked his head. His neck is getting quite the workout with this conversation.  
“The glasses. Randolph’s. Usually worn by pilots,” she pointed to the logo in the upper left of the glasses.  
“You are perceptive,” Leo grinned. “I like a perceptive woman…”  
She bowed her head, “Touché.” “Military?”  
“Vietnam. I fly a Cessna 310 Skynight now. It’s 30 years old but I have babied it. I have lately thought about maybe getting a jet.” And he had no idea why he told her that.  
“Oh. A man of means,” she teased lightly.  
“Means enough to buy a toy,” he said with a dismissive shrug.  
“Do you like having ‘means’?”  
He shrugged again. “Ya know, I really don’t care. It truly is only money.”  
She scrutinized his face. “Ah. I believe you.”  
“What do you do,” she asked, again changing the subject?  
There is a long pause in the conversation while Leo looks past her shoulder in thought.  
“I, uh, manage things,”  
“Where?”  
“Here in D.C.” He smiled.  
“I see.”  
“What do you do?”  
She pauses for a moment too, as if thinking how to answer the question. “I…intuit.”  
His eyebrow went up. “Intuit, what?”  
“Words, thoughts, ideas, feelings, meanings…”  
“I see. Where?”  
An impish grin lit her face. “Here in D.C.”  
He smiled, and then frowned when his phone rang.  
“Sorry,” he grimaced as he pulled the phone from his pocket. “Yeah. Okay…you sure…I need to go home first…NO…I need to change…Noooo...okay, fine…soon.”  
He closed the phone. “I gotta go.”  
“Okay. What’s your name?”  
Leo paused as he tugged down on his cap. “Uh, call me Mack.”  
She tilted her head and gazed at him for a long moment. “Okay. I’m Nan.”  
She stood with him. He took the hand she offered, and he held it just a bit too long before he let go.  
“So, maybe I will see you around sometime?”  
He grinned. “Yeah- ya know this has been one of the more interesting conversations I have had in a while.”  
“Me too.”  
She picked up her tote and chess set and headed off down the street. Leo watched her for a long moment, but she never looked back. He sighed and picked up his book, stuffed it in his back pocket then stuffed his fists into his jean pockets as he started back toward his apartment. Lewis caught up with him. “We need the car, Lewis. The White House calls.”  
Lewis spoke into his wrist mike as Leo continued down the sidewalk deep in thought.

Leo allowed himself a silent chuckle at the astounded look the White House security guard in the main lobby gave him. He can imagine what the poor guy must be thinking as he looked twice at his ID and three times at Leo and then signed him in. Besides the sunglasses and the FBI cap, both in his hands now, he has on jeans faded almost white and frayed at the cuffs, worn deck shoes with no socks and a Foo Fighters t-shirt. He really should have taken the time to change. The guard handed back the ID and nodded at him solemnly.  
Leo crossed the lobby and cut to the left to head to his office for a moment but was intercepted by Fitz as he too is going to the Situation Room. “Well, well. Leo. Is it Halloween,” Fitz boomed with a wide grin? He was absolutely delighted by Leo’s attire.  
“No,” Leo growled. My Sunday tooling around town disguise,” he said as he held up the hat and sunglasses.  
“Why do you need a disguise?”  
“Anonymity.”  
“Ah,” Fitz smiled as if that says it all.  
Leo changed course and walked with Fitz while he stuffed his hat in his back pocket and hooked the glasses over the collar of his shirt. “Is the President here?”  
“Just got here myself,” Fitz answered.  
“Yeah.”  
Leo placed his palm on the sensor by the door when they reach the sit room. He walked in and headed to his chair as Fitz swept past and walked over to Nancy McNally. Leo dropped into his chair and opened the file and realized he did not have his reading glasses. ‘Shit.’ He put on his sunglasses that had a reading prescription in the bottom of the lens. He was perusing the file when the door opened behind him and everyone stood.  
“Good afternoon, Mr. President.”  
“Good Morning. Is Leo here,” he asked as he looked at man at Leo’s chair? Then he did a triple take as he realized it was Leo.  
“Why, Leo. Is it Halloween?”  
“Have you been speaking to Fitz,” Leo growled?  
“No. Why? And why sunglasses in the sit room?”  
I forgot my reading glasses, and these are prescription.”  
“Oh. But why the attire?”  
“He is in disguise, Mr. President,” Fitz informed him from across the room with a grin.  
“All right. Don’t we have a world to save here or something?” Leo dropped back into his chair.  
“Disguise? Have you been wandering the streets incognito, Leo?”  
“Enough,” Leo growled. “It’s Sunday. It’s my day off. At least it was.”  
“Okay. The President laughed at Leo’s discomfort, getting just the rise out of him he wanted. “What’s up Fitz?”  
“Sir. We have reason to believe that a low-level member of the Politburo has information to pass on re a shipment of reactor parts to Iran. He wants to defect, and he wants a new identity.”  
“How credible is this,” Leo asked?  
“Low possible. The man in question is pretty low on the food chain and we are not sure we believe he has that kind of information or if it is valid,” Nancy answered.  
“So why are we here on a Sunday,” asked the President?  
“Because at the same time we also had an intercept from one of our guys in the region that an unknown shipment of unknown origin and character has shown up twice in the chatter.”  
“Okay, Follow up on it. Give it priority. I wanna hear something in a couple hours.” The President stood and nodded to Leo. Give me a minute. Your office.” Leo nodded back and they left as the room stood up and a chorus of “Thank you Mr. President” followed them out.  
Leo closed the door to his office when they walked inside.  
“You okay, Leo?”  
“Mr. President?”  
“Christ, Leo. I wish you would not be so damn formal. Anyway. How are you?”  
Leo dropped into his chair by the window and leaned back. He looked up at his friend Jed and a smiled. “Ya know what? I am good.”  
“Really,” Jed asked as he sat in the opposite chair?  
“Yeah. Really. I actually had a really nice morning, before I got called in.”  
“What did you do?”  
“My usual. Coffee shop on the corner with a copy of Yeats works. It was just a nice day, the coffee was really good, I was really enjoying my book and had an interesting conversation with someone at the shop.”  
“Who?”  
“Just another customer. Almost got their chess set stolen while inside getting a coffee refill. I stopped the guy. No, nothing much,” he said as he anticipated Jed’s question.” Just warned him off.”  
“Man? Woman?”  
“A woman. She plays chess with people at coffee houses. I have seen it at other places. It’s a regular crowd. They go from shop to shop and play.”  
“A lady,” Jed said with a smile. “Interesting conversation?”  
“Knock it off, will ya? We talked chess and Yeats. For about 20 minutes. Then she left. I doubt I will see her again.”  
“Do you want to see her again,” Jed asked with a grin.  
Leo stood up and mashed his hat on his head and put on his sunglasses. “I am going to try to salvage the rest of my day off.”  
“Have fun, Leo.”  
“Grrrrr,” Leo growled in his throat and stalked out of the room. The President watched him leave with his hands in his pockets and a smile on his face.

CJ was signing in in the lobby when she looked up and saw Leo.  
“Leo. Is that you? What the hell Leo?”  
“What are you doing here,” he demanded as he tried to straighten out his t-shirt and tugged on his cap?  
“I forgot something. What the hell are you doing here dressed like that?”  
“I am going home.” He growled and stepped around her and left.  
CJ looked at the security guard in disbelief. He just shrugged his shoulders and handed back her ID.

“I kid you not. I saw it with my own two eyes.”  
“Well I for one do not believe it.”  
“Sam, I talked to him.”  
“A Foo Fighters t-shirt?”  
“Yeah. And the oldest pair of faded jeans I have ever seen. They were white, for crying out loud. And he had on old broken-down deck shoes. And an FBI baseball cap and sunglasses.”  
“Well, I for one do not care what Leo was wearing or why,” Josh stated expansively as he dropped onto the couch in Leo’s office.  
Monday morning staff was already ten minutes behind schedule when Leo strode into the room. “Josh, get your feet off my coffee table.” Josh sat up straight on the couch and opened his mouth. He shouldn’t have but then Josh could not help himself. “CJ was telling us about your Foo Fighters t-shirt on Sunday. I said I didn’t care. But why…”  
“Shut up Josh.” Leo turned to glare at CJ. “You got a problem, spit it out, or forever hold your damn peace.”  
“I am just wondering if there is something, we need to know about your Sunday activities. I mean, just in case we have to spin this other life you seem to be…” CJ stopped talking. Leo looked like he was going to explode, he was beet red and he snapped the pencil he had in his hand. The pieces fell to the floor. “Are. You. Done?”  
“Uh, yes. I am. Gotta go. Work to be done.”  
CJ fled out of the corridor door of Leo’s office. Toby, Sam and Josh were hot on her heels without a word. Leo walked over and gave the door a very satisfying slam. Margaret came into the room, took one look at him and turned right around. He dropped into the chair behind his desk, dropped his head into his hands and moaned. It was only 8:00 am and he had lost all control of the children. It was gonna be a long day. 

Leo woke up to the sun shining in through his bedroom window. He stretched his arms over his head and for a brief moment thought he had overslept but then realized it was Sunday morning and his day off. The week had been brutal, and he thought it would never end, but end it had and he had gotten to bed around 3:00 in the morning. It was now 8:00 am and he felt pretty decent for a change. Then he remembered it was Sunday morning. One week ago, today he had met Nan at the coffee shop. He jumped out of bed and almost ran to the shower. Maybe, just maybe, she would be there today. It was Sunday after all.  
Leo dried off and went into the bedroom and opened the bureau drawer. He had over a dozen t-shirts that Mallory had given him over the years as gag gifts knowing he would probably never wear them, but he did. Every Sunday he wore his favorite faded blue jeans and one of the shirts. All band shirts, some of them bands of which he had never heard. Nine Inch Nails he had heard of and he liked the black shirt with the backward N logo on it. He pulled it over his head, brushed his hair, grabbed his glasses and today a NYFD baseball cap. He slipped his tattered Sperry shoes on and opened the front door into the corridor. Lewis was waiting for him and led the way down the hall to the stairwell. He entered first, spoke into his wrist mic, then motioned Leo forward and they skipped down the stairs and into the lobby. Cruze was at the lobby entrance and gave the go ahead and they went outside into the sunlit morning.  
Down the sidewalk and across the street and Leo was at the coffee shop nervously checking out front in the open-air seating for her. He felt a little twist in his stomach when he did not see her. Oh well, she showed up after him last time and he was a bit early. He opened the front door of the shop and ambled up to the counter to order.  
“Morning Mr. M,” Liz, the regular Sunday cashier greeted him. “The usual?”  
“Yup. No, wait. I think I am gonna try a Hammerhead today Liz. I need a jolt. Long day yesterday.”  
Liz grinned. “You want a double Hammerhead? That’s two espressos in there.”  
Leo shook his head and laughed. “Nah. I wanna wake up, not have a heart attack.” He pulled a ten out of his wallet, pocketed his change and went to wait for his coffee and espresso to come up. He then went back outside and staked claim to his usual table. He settled in, pulled his hat low over his eyes and took a long pull on the coffee. He swallowed and opened his eyes wide. ‘Holy crap. Am I gonna be wired.’ He blew out a breath and opened his book, determined to just enjoy his day and not hope too much that Nan might show. He had a hard cover today and he propped it up against the table edge and rested the bottom on his crossed leg. He slouched down and got comfy and delved into the life of Winston Churchill.

He sensed she was there before he saw her or heard her. He felt a presence and he raised his head. She was standing across P street on the curb gazing at him. He smiled. She smiled. Leo inclined his head to indicate the empty chair next to him, but she shook her head no. He felt a stab of, something; he didn’t know what.  
Then a young man in his late teens approached Nan and they briefly hugged. They crossed the street together and took the table next to Leos. Nan placed her chess set on the table and the young man began to set it up as Nan went inside and shortly returned with two coffees. She smiled at Leo and then sat and began her game. Leo tried to read his book, but he couldn’t help but watch Nan as she played chess with the boy. She was patient and they talked softly about what he was doing on in school and his current girlfriend and about the chess tournament that was coming up in a few weeks.  
The game progressed quickly as the young man was not close to Nan’s level. Leo was looking forward to the game ending, so Nan could come and sit with him, but minutes later the elderly gentleman from last week came and sat at the table with Nan and the boy. Obviously, he was to play Nan next. Leo almost let out a growl of frustration but smothered it and picked up his empty cup and went inside the coffee shop.  
When he came back out the boy was gone, and the elderly man and Nan were about 6 moves into the next game. This game lasted longer. Leo polished off his cappuccino and was pretty sure he was getting a little inpatient as the games went into its second hour. His book was forgotten, and he openly watched the game in progress. After another 20 minutes the gentleman tipped his king and conceded the game. He stood, hugged Nan and left.  
Nan looked at Leo and laughed, “Are you okay?”  
Leo blew out a breath. “What does it take to get a word with you?”  
“Wanna play a game?”  
“Sure. Why not?” Leo moved over to her table and then asked if she wanted another coffee. “Yes, I think I would. Than you.” Leo grabbed the empty cups and went back inside. He ordered two coffees and Liz poured them and handed them over. “Way to go, Mr. M.”  
Leo looked at her and she pointed outside. “Oh,” Leo blushed and quickly headed outside. He put the coffee cups on the table and sat. “Okay. I am ready to get whooped,” he smiled.  
Nan grabbed the coffee and took a healthy swig. “Oh yeah, I needed that. You should probably know I am a caffeine junkie.”  
Leo Laughed. “Me too. I had a Hammerhead this morning.”  
“A single or a double?”  
A single.”  
“Wimp,” Nan laughed.  
“Oh yeah? I thought I was gonna have palpitations,” Leo boasted.  
“When you have had a triple after a 24-hour day, then I will concede you are a caffeine junkie,” Nan grinned.  
“I am not sure I could ever handle a triple.”  
She settled into her chair and gave him a look. “You are white. Make your move Mack.”  
Leo looked at the board and had no idea how he intended to begin this game. He just grabbed a pawn and moved it up two spaces.  
“Ah. The Queen's Pawn game.”  
“Oh lord,” Leo moaned with a smile. It has a name?”  
“Just play, Mack. I was teasing.”  
Leo looked at her and the playful look on her face made him smile. This was going to be fun. The game lasted for well on to forty minutes and Leo suspected she could have whooped him after twenty but finally she swooped in and checkmated him before he understood what was happening. “Wow. I am impressed.”  
“And well you should be fella. YOU were not concentrating”  
“I was too,” Leo responded rather indignantly.  
“No. You were not. You have good moves, but you were watching me and not the board. You have to see the whole board.”  
Leo laughed out loud. “I really know someone who would love to play chess with you.”  
“So, you said last time.”  
“I was watching you, I confess. Sorry.”  
“No. Don’t be sorry. I’m happy you were. I, uh, you are, uh…oh crap”  
Leo snorted. “Oh crap?”  
She laughed again. “I am usually the last person to be without words,” she sighed. You are a good-looking man, Mack, I think. Ya know, the glasses, the hat. Could you…”  
Leo dropped his head. “Not yet, and not in public. Not that, I mean, I am, it’s not, you see…oh crap.”  
He raised his head and looked at her face. She was grinning at him, but in a wistful ‘you are full of shit’ kinda way. He was not quite ready to risk recognition, by anyone, on the street, by her, by anyone just yet. And Lewis would kill him.  
“Okay. At least you said not ‘yet’ instead of never. Look, Mack. I have to go now.”  
Leos stomach clenched. “Do you have to? I was sort of hoping maybe we could grab a quick bite. Ya know there is this great pizza place, it’s on the second floor of a townhouse. It’s on DuPont circle, Pizza Paradiso…”  
“I know the place. But no, not today Mack. Soon, maybe, but this; no, this is really new. Too new. And I for one tend to not rush into things, especially with a secret agent spy guy in ‘disguise’ who cannot let me see his face. Not today, Mack. I really do have to go.”  
“Okay. Look. I am so sorry. Will I see you here next week?”  
“Anything is possible Mack. But, don’t count on it. Maybe. That’s all I got right now. I really do like you…so far. We’ll see.” Nan leaned over and gave him a chaste kiss on his cheek and grabbed her things and left. Leo sat back in his chair and didn’t move. He blew out a breath and figured he had blown it. ‘So, what’s new?’ He ran the day over in his mind, over and over again, until Lewis came over and sat next to him. “Sir?”  
Leo jumped. “Lewis. Jeez. Yeah?”  
“It’s 3:00 sir.”  
Leo looked a little lost for a moment, then nodded his head. “Oh, yeah. Okay. Um, I am just gonna head home.”

Leo waited in the hall while Lewis swept the apartment then went in after the all clear and slammed the door. He stopped in his tracks, dropped his head, then went back to the door opened it and softly said, “Sorry, Lewis.”  
“Quite all right, sir.”  
Leo gently closed the door and dropped his book, hat and glasses on the table in the foyer and went down the short hallway to his bedroom. He kicked his shoes onto the floor of the walk-in closet and dropped his jeans and shirt into a laundry basket by the door. He put on a pair of soft khakis and a Bartlett for America sweatshirt and pulled the sleeves up to his elbows.  
On his way back through the foyer he grabbed his book and went into the kitchen. He was jumpy and wired from all the coffee he had earlier, and he was hungry but didn’t want to bother with making a meal, so he just poured a glass of iced tea from the pitcher in the fridge, grabbed his book and went through into the sunroom. This sunroom was one of the main reasons he took this apartment. He threw open the doors on the back wall and settled into the small couch he had placed before the doors facing out. A cool breeze came in through the windows and he settled back to read and sip his tea.  
He didn’t read much as his mind kept going back to Nan and the conversation of this afternoon. ‘Dammit. Enough.” He threw the book on the couch, closed the doors, then put his glass in the sink and went to his home office. The office was off the dining room by the second bedroom and had no windows in it. It was a small 8’ x 11’ and always felt a little claustrophobic to him, but he pulled his files out of his briefcase, settled into the chair behind his desk and began to read. Soon anything else on his mind that had been bothering him was lost in the legalese and legislative language that defined his life.

“Sir? Mr. McGarry?” Leo grunted and then winced when he lifted his head. He had fallen asleep in his chair and his head had fallen to the side and now he had a hell of a kink in his neck. He opened his eyes and saw Lewis standing over him. “Aw, jeez. What time is it?”  
“You’re not late sir, but you usually give us a heads up when you are up, and it is 5:30 and you said we needed to leave at 6:00.”  
“Okay, Lewis. Let me shower and we can head out.” Leo rubbed his neck and stood up. He swayed a bit and caught the desk. ‘I am getting too old for this.’  
He left the office and saw Cruze in the kitchen holding out a mug of coffee. Leo reached for it and inhaled the aroma. “Bless you Cruze, you just may be my favorite agent of the day.” Cruze just nodded his head and went back out into the hall.

At 6:15 on Monday morning Leo strode into his office where Margaret was placing files on his desk and a cup of coffee. He reached for the cup and drained half of it in the first gulp. “At your first opportunity I need another one of these,” Leo half groaned as he set the cup down.  
“Someone stay up all night reading files again,” Margaret quipped?  
“Shut up, Margaret.”  
“Staff in fifteen minutes.”  
“I know, Margaret. Coffee.”

Somehow, magically the whole day had flown by. Senior staff, then meetings with two Senators, a committee chairman, two trips to the Hill, a meeting on gun legislation (again), a lunch with the Ambassador to Chile, then another round of meetings, afternoon staff, a sit down with the President and Bruno and lo and behold it was 6:30 in the evening and nothing else had reared its ugly head.  
“Is he in,” he hard Josh ask Margaret?  
“Come in, Josh.”  
“Leo.” Josh sat in the chair next to his desk. “I got all that data we needed from the last gun poll. Joey gave me extensive data results. We can begin tearing that apart and matching it with the latest data from the gun lobby and see where we can counter their talking points.  
“Good.”  
“You okay Leo?”  
“Josh,” Leo drew out his name with a warning look.  
“I know. No, it’s just you have been kinda quiet the last couple of weeks. In a good way, not a bad way, I mean, like you are thinking about something and haven’t figured it out yet.”  
Leo just looked back down to his desk top and ignored Josh.  
“Ya know, if you need any help, just let me know.” Josh stood up and when Leo didn’t comment he left.  
Leo leaned back in chair and spun it around to stare out of the window. ‘Yeah. I have not figured this out yet. Figured her out. Maybe I should just let this go and find another coffee shop to go to, far away from DuPont Circle. I don’t need this right now, maybe never.’ He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Unfortunately, I want this right now. Damn, but I really want this right now.’ He spun his chair back around and grabbed the next file.  
At 8:00 Margaret spoke from the doorway. “Leo?”  
He lifted his head and looked at her. “It’s 8:00 Leo. You should go home. It was a good day.” Leo’s stomach decided then to growl and they both laughed. He looked at the plate on his desk with a sandwich that had one bite taken out of it. “Yeah. Okay. Let’s call it. I guess I need some dinner. Thank you, Margaret.”  
She came into the room and stepped behind his desk on his left and closed all the open windows and shut down the computer. “Now you have to go,” she said with a smile. Margaret went out into her office and shut everything down. By then Leo was stuffing his briefcase and shutting off the lights. They walked out together and said good night.  
Leo’s driver was waiting for him. “Home sir?”  
“Yeah. Wait, no. Stop at Whole Foods on the way back.”  
“Which one sir?”  
“Don’t care Eddie,” Leo said as he laid back his head.  
At Whole Foods Leo grabbed a hand basket and went to the produce section. He got greens for a salad and then went to the fish counter and got a nice chunk of Chilean Sea Bass. He considered going back to get a lemon, some dill and capers to do a sauce but he decided not to. He was too tired and wanted to keep it simple. He checked out and went back to the car. He saw Lewis’s car parked right behind his car and driver. Lewis was standing next to the car and speaking into his wrist mic. ‘oh shit. Forgot to tell Lewis.’ Lewis didn’t like it when Leo changed plans on the fly. It made Lewis’s job harder.  
“Better get me home Eddie, before Lewis gets really pissed. Eddie chuckled. “Yes sir.”  
At his apartment he got out after telling Eddie to pick him up at 6:00 as usual. Lewis jumped out of the car and Cruze went to park. Lewis didn’t say anything as they took the steps up to Leo’s apartment. Leo waited in the doorway while Lewis cleared the apartment.  
“Good to go sir. Staying in tonight?” Lewis cocked his head slightly to the left and raised his eyebrows. Leo laughed. “Sorry Frank,” Leo apologized using the agents given name. “Yeah, I am in for the night.”  
“Goodnight sir.”

Leo dropped his briefcase by the table in the foyer and went to change. He came back into the kitchen barefoot and in blue jeans and an old flannel shirt. He went over to the wall ovens and turned on the upper to preheat. He emptied his grocery bag and put it in the trash. He got a salad bowl out of the cupboard and a cast iron grill pan from under the range top. He tore the romaine lettuce by hand and put it in the bowl. The he crushed a garlic clove and sprinkled it over the lettuce and got some shaved parmesan from the fridge and added that to the salad. Next, he whisked some lemon juice, olive oil and salt and pepper. He took a jalapeno from the crisper drawer and sliced it paper thin and added it to the marinade. He put the fish on a plate and covered it with the marinade. While the oven heated, he went out into the living room. The long wall was all windows and the short end had a balcony. He went and pulled the blinds to all the windows and turned on CNN. The oven beeped in the kitchen announcing it was ready to go.  
He put the fish in the grill pan with a little olive oil and poured a portion of the marinade over the fish. He placed it in the oven and set the timer. While the fish cooked, which shouldn’t take long, he got a glass and popped open a bottle of tonic and squeezed a lemon wedge and dropped it in. He leaned up against the sink and sipped until the timer went off. He took the fish out of the oven and spooned a little more marinade over the top and the rest of the jalapenos. He went through the motions of cooking easily. He loved to cook. He wondered how many people knew that. Knew that he loved the ingredients and the process and the creativity. It was a way to unwind, to think, to ponder while his hands did the work.  
After the fish had five minutes to rest, he plated it with the jalapenos and a bit more marinade. He filled a smaller bowl with salad and poured some Cesar dressing on it from a bottle in the fridge. He carried the plate and bowl to the living room and put them on the coffee table, made sure the remote was near at hand and sat on the edge of the couch eating while watching the news. Since he and Jenny had split, he rarely ate at a dining room table. The dining room in his apartment was a separate room and even though it had a window he felt silly sitting there alone and he couldn’t see the television from there either. So, he sat on the couch. Jenny would have had a fit if he had done that back when they were still together. By doing it now he felt a little rebellious and wondered what the hell kind of point he was trying to make.  
Disgusted with his train of thought he just ate and watched the news, flipping channels from program to program until he got too tired to keep his eyes open. He turned off the TV, gathered his plates and dropped them in the sink along with the grill pan. He put the leftover salad in the fridge with a cover on the bowl and turned out the light. His cleaning lady came in the morning and she would take care of his mess.  
He went into his room, dropped his clothes on the floor where he stood and dropped onto the unmade bed in his boxers. He was asleep in moments. That in itself was unusual. Leo McGarry was not a good sleeper. Had not been for many, many years. His grateful subconscious snuggled in for the night.


	2. Chapter II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo seemed to see what happened next in slow motion. Lewis and Cruze were both running across the street to the coffee shop. Nan’s mouth dropped open and her eyes were wide. She shoved her chair back from the table. She picked up the book laying on the table and threw it at Leo. The book bounced off his chest. Lewis and Cruze grabbed her by both arms and restrained her. She fought them. Cruze tightened his hold and she cried out in pain. Leo leapt to his feet and shouted.

CHAPTER II

“Leo?”  
“LEO?”  
Someone kicked his foot under the table. Leo started and looked across at Admiral Fitzwallace. “Where were you?”  
“Sorry. Something on my mind that just won’t go away.” Leo shrugged and sat up straight and looked around the table in the Situation Room. He blushed when he realized everyone was looking at him.  
“So,” Fitz asked?  
“Sorry, I really missed…”  
“Leo, you okay man?”  
“Yeah,” he smiled. Actually, I really am.”  
“Good. Now. Do you concur, we give it 24 hours, get updates every 4 hours, see where the situation goes. We have eyes on the ground in Bogota, so our intel will be current.”  
“Yeah, I agree. I want to hear anything you have as it comes in, okay?”  
“You bet. Meet here in four?”  
Leo looked at his watch. It would be 10:00pm. “Yeah. In four.”  
“Do you think this is a build up to something more? The elections there are just weeks away.”  
“Probably. We’ll know something soon”  
Chairs scraped the floor as everyone stood and went their separate ways. In less than a minute only Leo and Fitz were still sitting in their chairs. Leo rubbed his face, hard, and blew out a breath. Fitz just raised an eyebrow and waited.  
Leo looked at him and dropped his eyes to the table again. Fitz smiled. “It can’t be that bad, can it,” he grinned? What’s the matter? Have to change your shampoo again?”  
Leo snorted. “No, my shampoo is just fine, Fitz.” Leo pushed his chair back.   
“Leo, ya know I am a friend and discrete as hell.”  
“I know, Fitz. Right now, I am not sure…uh, I just got something going on in my head right now.”  
“That, my friend, sound like woman trouble.”  
Leo looked up at Fitz and gave him a rare grin. “Could be, Fitz. Could be.”  
Fitzwallace’s face lit up. “Go for its Leo. No one deserves it more than you.”  
“Yeah. Maybe…yeah,” Leo muttered as he stood.   
“See ya in four hours, Leo. Grab a bite to eat, I can hear your stomach from over here.”  
Leo harrumphed. “Now you sound like Margaret.”  
“Lady only has your best interest at heart...”  
“Later, Fitz,” Leo cut him off and left the sit room.

Leo went back to his office and pulled out all the Intel he had on the FARC. Something was bothering him. Something that he had read coupled with the information Fitz had reported was just out of reach, so he read and re-read each report. It was gonna be a long night. His stomach growled again, and he walked over to the doorway and peeked around at Margaret.  
“You still here,” he growled? Make yourself useful and get me a sandwich.”  
Margaret glared at him. “Please, Margaret. What kind?”  
“I don’t care Margaret. Something edible and a soda.”  
He went back into his office and opened up the DEA file on the FARC to read before the next sit room meeting. He barely noticed Margaret when a turkey sandwich appeared at his elbow. He picked it up and chewed without really tasting it. He reached for more and realized he had eaten the whole thing, so he sat back in his chair and just read. Margaret came into the office and stopped at the doorway. “Admiral Fitzwallace called. Ten minutes for your next update in the sit room.”  
“Okay,” Leo said and stood up gathering the files he had been reading and shoved them into a folder. Go home, Margaret. I won’t really need you anymore tonight.” Leo walked past her left the office.  
“Good night to you too, Leo,” Margaret said as she turned to her office and shut everything down.

Admiral Fitzwallace cleared his throat before speaking and also getting everyone’s attention. He looked up and down the table.   
“We have confirmation from a source outside of Bogota that the chatter we have been getting is concerning a FARC shipment of drugs. The shipment is large and is expected to be used to fund military operations against Venezuela. A guerilla faction in Venezuela is planning on intercepting the shipment. This could really ugly really fast.”  
“Do we know how the drugs are being transported and here they are going,” Leo asked as he scanned the files before him?  
“We are getting confirmation on that and believe the first destination is to be Buenaventura on the coast, a harbor town, and then by boat to El Salvador. We believe the final destination to be Indonesia, but that is still speculation. We do not know the mode of transport from El Salvador.”  
“If they get the money for this shipment it could fuel skirmishes and fighting and keep the FARC going for months. And arms I don’t even want to think about. We need to get to this shipment before it can be sold and before the Venezuelan’s get to it. I don’t know what they would do with it, but I suspect not turn it over to relevant authorities,” Leo looked at this watch. “I have to wake the President now Fitz and fill him in. The shipment has not moved yet?”  
“No. But soon from what we can gather. We really need to stop this before they get to El Salvador and even better before they get to Buenaventura. And also, we do not have any idea where the Venezuelans are. As a matter of fact, we do not know if they are even going to be involved. We have had no indication. It could be misdirection.”  
Leo stood, and all the other chairs scraped back as everyone stood. “Two hours. I will brief the President. I need to know when they are moving and if any Venezuelan guerilla factions have been detected on the move.”  
Fitz nodded, and Leo left to head back to his office.

“Leo?”  
“Sir. Sorry to bother you. I know it’s 4:00 am there, but we have a situation.”  
The President sighed. “When don’t we have a problem anymore Leo?”  
“Yeah. Tell me about it. Well this one involves the FARC in Columbia. We have confirmation of a huge drug shipment being readied to move off the west coast to El Salvador and from there, we think, to Indonesia…”  
“And the sale of a huge drug shipment could fund the FARC for quite a while and buy a whole lot of arms.”  
“Yeah.”  
“So what is the plan?”  
“We think the Venezuelans are preparing a guerilla assault team to intercept the shipment and probably try to sell it for their own use. Whatever their intentions, I do not think they are going to turn it over to the authorities. The team recommendation is a Ranger team out of Fort Benning to do an intercept of the shipment before it reaches Buenaventura on the coast. If they cannot intercept before they get out to sea, we have a Navy Seal team heading to the area from Naval Base San Diego. They are on the move now just in case. If they get out to sea and we have a positive ident on the vessel, the SEAL team will board and take over the vessel. If they are unable to that we have a diplomatic solution in the works in conjunction with El Salvador and the DEA, and I gotta tell ya, I am not happy about that.”  
“Leo, are we scrambling on this? It sounds like this is a seat of the pants thing here.”  
“We got the intel late in the game here. We don’t have a lot of time to plan and get this up and running. I am not very confident here, but it’s all we got. Do we have a go ahead?”  
The President sighed. “Yeah. Give it a go order. Call me every hour. I wanna know what’s going on.”  
“Yes sir. Thank you, sir.”  
Leo didn’t wait for the two hours he had asked Fitz for to pass. He called him as soon as hung up with the President and gave him the go order. He sat back in in his chair and rubbed his face and groaned. ‘I need coffee.’ They always had coffee in the sit room, so he gathered his files and headed down to the sit room to pass the coming hours and overdose on caffeine.

Just 8:00 the next morning Leo made his way back to his office for morning staff. When he got to his office everyone was there. CJ by his desk, Toby in a chair at the table, Josh sprawled on the couch and Sam holding up the wall as usual.  
Leo went to his chair and dropped into it with a groan.  
“Yeah. Someone didn’t go home last night. Same suit Leo.”  
“Shut up, Josh.”  
Toby glared at Josh. “What’s going on Leo?”  
“Drug shipment in Columbia. The FARC. We are trying to intercept before they can get out to sea. Been waiting since midnight for word from the Ranger team.” Leo sat up and bellowed, “Margaret.”  
She came into the room holding a mug of coffee and plopped it on his desk, then turned around and walked back out. Josh snickered, and Leo glared at him.  
“Okay. Josh, you are on the Hill today, right?” Leo didn’t wait for an answer and forged ahead. “Toby and Sam, the Oklahoma speech. CJ, anything I need to know?”  
“Maybe, but I am still waiting for an answer from the Post. I will let you know what when I get the answer.”  
“Fine. Get out. And tell Margaret to bring in Tylenol and more coffee.”  
CJ smiled. “Okay”

Just before noon, Margaret went in to the office to tell Leo he was needed in the sit room. He was sitting in his chair before the desk with his chin on his chest and was softly snoring. Margaret smiled then composed her face and cleared her throat loudly. Leo started and lifted his head.  
“I was not sleeping,” he said as he saw Margaret smirk. “Sure Leo. Admiral Fitzwallace needs you in the sit room. “  
Leo sat up, stretched and stood. “Thanks, Margaret. Hey, when I get back can you grab me some lunch?”  
“It’s what I live for,” she said under her breath.  
Leo gave her a look and left the room.

“We got the shipment. Mr. President. It is secure and on its way to an undisclosed location within the US where it will be disposed of.”  
“Any casualties?”  
“Three FARC killed, one Ranger injured but it’s not serious.”  
“Good. Good. Thanks Leo.”  
“Thank you, Mr. President. See you in a few days when you get back.”  
Leo sat back at his desk and rubbed his forehead. ‘God, am I tired.’ It was 2:00 in the afternoon and he had at least three more meetings to get through and an opposition brief to go over. ‘Coffee. And lots of it.’ “Margaret,” he bellowed and started reading.

The rest of the week had been one almost disaster after another and by the time Saturday afternoon rolled around everyone was exhausted. CJ yawned and put her head on her arms at the table in Leo’s office. Toby paced the floor driving Leo nuts as he tried to dodge him doing his own pacing. Josh was sprawled on the couch and Sam was waging a losing battle holding up the wall which obviously was now holding him up.   
Leo stopped abruptly, and Toby plowed into him with his head down. “That’s it,” Leo bellowed throwing his arms up in the air. “I am done.” He went to his desk and dropped into the chair.  
“Okay.”   
“Okay,” he started again. “Okay, tomorrow is an off day. Go do something stupid, or sleep in, or just, I don’t know, recharge. We will pick this up again on Monday. If you think of anything, write it down. Get out of here. No one comes in here tomorrow unless the world is coming to an end.”  
Everyone stirred slowly, stood, stretched and left. CJ lagged behind. “You too, Leo. Go home.”  
“I am CJ. I am.”  
“Okay,” she muttered and left.  
Leo reached out to pick up a file and then stopped. He shook his head and stifled a yawn. He stood up, turned out the light on his desk, grabbed his briefcase, stuffed a handful of papers in it and left pulling the office door closed behind him. He stopped briefly in the bullpen to have one of the junior assistants close down his office and have it locked and for the first time since he could remember he left the White House while the sun was still shining.

“Are you in for the evening sir,” Lewis asked when he finished sweeping the apartment and stepped aside to let Leo enter?  
“Yeah. I am just gonna relax. I was thinking of just ordering a pizza from Paradiso. They usually get someone there to run one down the street to me when I ask. Do you and Cruze want one? Ya gotta eat.”  
“Actually, tell me what you want and Cruze can go pick it up along with one for us and he can do a sweep outside. Since the place is just down the street, he can do the daily sweep of the neighborhood.”  
“Thanks Lewis. I will take a small Bosco and have them add the sheep sausage,” Leo said as he pulled out his wallet and handed Lewis a fifty-dollar bill. “Shut up Lewis,” Leo said as Lewis was about to protest.  
“Sir. By the way, a Bosco?”  
“Yeah, it has Spinach, Mozzarella, Red Onions, Mushrooms and I love their sheep sausage on it.”  
“Very good, sir.”  
Leo dropped his briefcase in his office and walked into his bedroom stripping off his tie. The suit jacket followed to be hung up on a hanger with the pants to go to the cleaners. He tossed the shirt in the laundry basket and peeled his socks off. Minutes later he shuffled into the kitchen wearing gray soft flannel pajama pants and a worn cotton Henley shirt.   
He popped open a tonic water and squeezed a lime into it and went into the living room, turned on CNN and sat back on the sofa to wait for his pizza. Twenty-five minutes later Lewis knocked on the door and stepped in. He met Leo in the foyer, passed over the pizza and Leo’s change. “In for the night, I assume sir?”  
“Yeah. Thanks Lewis. I um, uh, tomorrow…”  
“Coffee shop as usual. Got it. Have a good night. Goodson will be here for the evening shift at 7:00. I will take off then. See you tomorrow.” Lewis quietly shut the door leaving Leo to figure out he was going to spend the rest of a long evening.

Last Sunday Leo and Nan had spent their third ‘meeting’, Leo really couldn’t call it a date, talking and talking and talking for the first two hours and then her phone rang. She had glanced at him from under hooded eyes as he watched her. She finished her call after telling the person on the other end of the line she would see them shortly.   
“I have to go. It’s work,” she explained as she gathered up her things.   
“I kinda wish you would tell me what you do. Why do you have to go to work on a Sunday?”  
“When the boss calls, I go. And when you take off the damned glasses and tell me who and what YOU really are, Mack, I will tell you more about me. Until then, live with the disappointment,” she snapped at him.  
Leo was taken aback and had slid back in his chair and just watched as she headed off down the street. ‘Shit,’ was all he could come up with. 

This Sunday he was a little nervous. He didn’t know if she was gonna show up after last week and he breathed a huge sigh of relief when he saw her walking down the sidewalk toward the coffee shop. He stood when she reached his table and he held out the chair next to him for her. She sat back I the chair and studied him for several minutes. “Still with the glasses and hat I see. I like the shirt,” she gave him a crooked smile.  
“Thanks. I really like Bono. So did you have to work long last Sunday?”  
She tilted her head at him and pursed her lips. She didn’t answer for a long minute. “A couple of hours,” she finally answered then stood up abruptly. “I am getting a coffee.”  
Leo started to stand. “Let me.”  
“Sit. I can get my own cup of coffee.”  
Leo sat back down and drew in a deep breath. “This is not going well. Geez, I think she is pissed. But what the hell for?’  
Nan came back and sat down a few minutes later with a cappuccino. She took a sip and settled back in her chair.  
“So, what did you do with the rest of your Sunday last week?”  
“Nothing much. Went back to my place. Heated up some left-over chili I had in the freezer. Watched CNN and passed out on the couch.”  
“Tired or one beer to many,” she asked innocently.  
“Tired. I don’t drink.”  
“Oh. Why not?”  
“Just don’t,” he answered sharper than he intended to.  
She looked at him again with that tilt to her head. She saw that she had hit a sore spot. She had no idea what it meant, but she made a note to not mention drinking again. “Sorry.”  
“Yeah. Me too. Sorry that is. So, no chess today,” he asked as he noticed she did have the ubiquitous chess board with her?  
“Well, I thought we could just talk this Sunday, without having to talk around my chess matches.”  
“So, you want to talk,” Leo shifted in his seat and took another sip of his coffee. “What about?”  
“Oh, I don’t know. Life, world peace, the state of the union, what are your favorite restaurants, why do you insist on the disguise?”  
Leo dropped his head to his chest and breathed out through his nose. He raised his head and looked her in the eye, although ‘she couldn’t see that because he had on the glasses’ he chided himself. “I really do not want to do this right now and certainly not here in the open air.”  
“We could go inside the shop, it’s not too busy in there. And now seems to be as good a time as any for me.”  
“Yeah, but it’s not for me,” Leo raised his voice.  
Nan sat back in her chair. She had never heard him raise his voice, especially with that tone in it. Commanding, brooking no argument. He was angry, and Nan felt a small flutter of fear in her stomach. ‘I am glad we are out in the open’ she thought as she looked around.  
Leo saw the fear suddenly appear in her eyes and his heart skipped a beat or three. “Nan, no, I am so sorry. Forgive me. Please, I am, uh, not someone to be afraid of. Far from it. Really. I uh…god dammit,” he finished. “Nan?”  
She reached out and touched his hand. She saw the truth in what he said and knew was sorry for the lapse. “Okay. Okay. Look, Mack,” she said and saw him jump. ‘Why would he jump…’  
Leo leaned forward slowly and took her hand in his. He held it gently and rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. “Okay. Okay. I…crap. Okay.”  
He released her hand and sat back in his chair. He took a deep shaky breath that scared her again. “Nan, my name is not Mack.”  
“Okaaaay,” she pulled away from the table and sat back.  
“Look over your shoulder, your left shoulder. See the guy over at the table across the street sitting there with a Coke,” she looked and nodded noticing the man in the black suit and dark glasses. “Now look to your right, across the street at the corner on the bench.” She saw another man in a darkish suit and sunglasses holding a Washington Post.  
“I see him.”  
Leo took a deep breath. “They are Secret Service agents. Mine. My detail. They go everywhere I go, 24/7.”  
Nan wrapped her arms around her middle and stared at Leo. He noticed Lewis was now standing up across the street and talking into his wrist mic. He knew something was up.   
“Why,” she said softly.  
Leo reached up to his face. “Because my name is not Mack, well, it is, a nickname from the time I was in the Air Force. But not what I go by now.” He took off the glasses and the hat and dropped them on the table before him. “My name is Leo McGarry and I am President Bartlet’s Chief of Staff.”  
Leo seemed to see what happened next in slow motion. Lewis and Cruze were both running across the street to the coffee shop. Nan’s mouth dropped open and her eyes were wide. She shoved her chair back from the table. She picked up the book laying on the table and threw it at Leo. The book bounced off his chest. Lewis and Cruze grabbed her by both arms and restrained her. She fought them. Cruze tightened his hold and she cried out in pain. Leo leapt to his feet and shouted.  
“STOP IT. Enough. Frank, let her go. You too, Ernesto.” He stepped toward Nan, but she shrank back from his out stretched hand. Lewis and Cruze stepped away from her, Lewis talking quietly into his wrist mic.   
“I can’t do this. I can’t,” Nan whispered hoarsely as she stared at Leo. “I…you. NO. Not with YOU. I can’t, I JUST CAN’T…” Nan continued with a horrified expression on her face.  
Leo felt like someone had reached into his chest with an ice-cold hand and grabbed his heart. He flinched in pain as his heart thudded. ‘GOD. It’s me. She’s horrified of ME. Not the agents, not anything else. Just because I am ME. She must know the stories. GOD.’  
Leo sat down hard in the chair behind him and looked at her. She grabbed her tote from the back of the chair and backed away as her mouth worked but no words came out. Then she just whispered once more, “No.” The she turned and walk away. She never looked back. She held her head up and walked as quickly as she could down the street.  
Leo watched until she disappeared from sight and continued to stare into the distance long after. Lewis put his glasses and hat back on when Leo didn’t respond to him. He sent Cruze back across the street and he sat at the table across from Leo. Leo’s hands fidgeted in his lap, clenching and unclenching. He sat unmoving, his face lax, no emotion, no expression. He sat as if paralyzed, unable to move, barely able to breathe.  
Of all the reactions people have had over the years to him, to his alcoholism, the drugs, his single minded political focus, even those back in the day who hated him because he had answered the call of his country and killed in the name of his country, all the reactions ranging from disgust to hate, he did not remember anyone showing the kind of fear and panic he had seen on her face.  
‘My god. She couldn’t get away from me fast enough; far enough. She ran, never looked back, she is gone, and I am the cause of that. Not for anything I have done, but just for being me.’ He didn’t realize that he moaned, a deep guttural sound that came from his gut. Lewis heard it and it scared him. He brought his wrist to his mouth.  
“Cruze, we have to get him outta here. Now.” He looked over to where Cruze was back standing on the street corner, nodding. He began his sweep of the area, walking down the street from the intersection down P and then 22nd, checking the entrances to buildings, side streets, upper stories of the buildings. “Clear,” he muttered in to the mic.  
Lewis answered back,” Okay. Let’s go.” He stood and walked around the table to Leo’s right side and grabbed his arm. “C’mon sir. Time to leave.” He pulled up on Leo’s arm, but he didn’t respond, did not stand at Lewis urging. He squatted down next to Leo and pulled off the dark glasses. He turned Leo’s face, so he could look in his eyes. “SIR.” He reached over and grabbed his hand and squeezed hard. Leo winced and his eyes focused. He then noticed Lewis in front of him.   
“Stand up, Mr. McGarry.” He tugged on his arm again and this time Leo stood. Lewis steadied him when he wobbled and shoved the table out of the way. “Now sir. Move.”   
Leo walked beside Lewis who had to guide him around the other tables and onto the sidewalk. They walked slowly down the street the short distance to Leo’s apartment. Lewis walked them across the street and into the front entrance of the building.  
Inside the apartment Lewis leaned Leo up against the wall in the foyer and slipped his shoes off. He took the hat and sunglasses and dropped them on the foyer table. He guided Leo to left down the hall and past the bathroom and walk in closets to his bedroom. Leo didn’t say a word as Lewis sat him on the unmade bed then laid him back. He undid his jeans and pulled them off his legs and tossed them on the chair. He positioned the pillow under Leo’s head and pulled the covers up to his chest.  
“Sleep, sir,” Lewis muttered, and Leo just closed his eyes. He stood and watched him for a minute then went out pulling the door mostly closed. He went into the living room and sat at the breakfast bar on the tall stool and pulled out his phone to make the difficult call he had to make. After two rings the call connected. “Agent Butterfield, please.”

Ron Butterfield stood on the steps in front of the brick home on O street. He rang the bell again, waiting for the door to open. He knew she was home. The agent assigned to follow her confirmed it. Finally, the door opened slowly, and she stepped to the glass. Ron held his ID up, so she could read it. She reached out and unlocked the door then turned away and walked back into the house. Ron opened the door and went in to the small foyer. He walked into the narrow hallway and looked left into the empty living room. He stepped further down the hall and saw the dining room to the left was empty. He passed the stairs to the upper floor and walked into the kitchen where she leaned up against the sink holding a cup of steaming liquid. She had placed the large island between him and herself.   
Ron saw a very attractive, slender, forty something woman before him. She had shoulder length light brown hair with glints of red-gold. She was pale with a dusting of faint freckles across her nose and faint lines crinkled in the corner of her eyes. Her green eyes watched him with wariness. The cup in her hand trembled slightly.  
“Did he...”  
“No, Ma’am. He did not send me. He does not know I am here. He does not know who you are.”  
At that her eyes widened, and her head tilted.  
“He doesn’t. But we do. From the first time you met we had you checked out. We knew who you were before the next meeting.”  
“And you never told him…” she questioned. “Why?”  
“Not our place. We had to know to provide him with protection, but he did not know, and you had no idea who he was. We knew you would both figure it out in time. I just did not anticipate the reaction, but I am sure you have your reasons. Rest assured, we will not divulge any information unless it affects his safety. You WILL be watched, for a while. If this is truly over, then we will not need to keep you under surveillance for long. That is all I wanted to let you know.”  
Ron turned to leave. “Is he…” she couldn’t finish.  
Ron did not turn to look at her as he spoke. “Also, not our place to get involved…unless his safety is involved.” He walked out of the room and she heard the soft click of the front door closing. Her hand trembled hard and this time she lost her grip on the cup and it smashed on the floor. ‘Damn him.’

 

When Leo woke it was dark outside the bedroom window. He lay on his left side starring out at the lights – the streetlights, headlights and tail lights passing back and forth, the few of the brightest stars he could see. He grabbed one of the spare pillows on his bed and pulled it tight up against his aching gut. The lights swam and went out of focus when his eyes filled with tears. ‘Just another fuck up, McGarry. Jesus, could ya just stop fucking up your personal life. Jenny, Mal, god damn bottle, pills. I am so tired. So tired of being alone, using work to fill all the silent hours that I can’t seem to fill any other way. It’s not working anymore. I could work 20 hours a day and it’s not enough. When it’s gone, when the work is gone, when I can’t function anymore, what the hell have I got left? Nothing, just the darkness and no lights to fill it.’ He hugged the pillow tight to his chest and fell into a restless sleep.

Just over a mile away to the west another restless sleeper wrestled with her own dreams and demons. Camera flashes blinded her and the questions thrown at her felt like physical blows. Hands plucked at her clothing demanding her attention. He held her hand, but he could not save her. He could not protect her. He was the cause of the chaos. The voices demanded answers. She couldn’t do it. She could not stand it. Her life would be splashed all over the media. It was inevitable. It would happen. She could not let it happen again. The shame. She couldn’t face it again. The need for the knowing. She could not be laid open like that ever again. Not even for the first man who had made her laugh in seven years. Not even for the man who made her suddenly feel like a woman again. In the seconds after he had revealed who he was, she saw it all. Saw would happen. Saw what her life, their life could, would, become. No. Not even for him.

 

At some point during the night Leo had wandered into the sun room and curled onto the small loveseat that he had placed in front of the doors facing out. He sipped iced tea from a heavy bottomed highball glass and watched the night outside. Lewis found him there at 6:00 am when he came into to sweep the apartment and take over from the night shift. He had a moment of fear when he saw the glass in Leo’s hand and the brown/amber liquid in it. Leo was staring at the lightening northern sky when Lewis took the glass form his hand and sniffed.   
“It’s not booze, Lewis,” Leo muttered and slowly stood up.  
“Yes sir. It’s after 6:00. Are you going in?”  
“Don’t I always, Lewis,” Leo asked as he stepped around Lewis and shuffled to his bedroom, but not before Lewis places a hand on his shoulder, for just a moment. Leo nodded his head without looking at Lewis and kept walking. 

Lewis watched as Leo walked away. He took a deep breath and shook his head. An agent was not supposed to get close to the protectee. You had to know them, know them almost as well as a member of your family, to protect them, to anticipate them, to understand them, but always with that required level of detachment, of professionalism. Lewis could not help it though. He liked this man, with all his faults, he admired him.  
Lewis has been with Leo from day one. He started on night shift, outside the door of his hotel room from 7:00 pm to 7:00am, or whenever he left for the day and the day shift took over. He had seen all the facets of Leo McGarry. All the sides of him. Seen the exhaustion, the stress, the determination. He has heard the cries and screams in the night when his demons had won over him, seen him punch the wall in anger and sit with his head in his hands in despair. He has seen the silent loneliness that Leo drew tight around him like a protective armor and he had seen the cracks in the armor and wished he could heal it for him.  
But over the last three weeks he had seen a change in Leo. Changes that no one else might notice. Now, as head of Leo’s detail, outside of the White House, he saw more and knew more about Leo McGarry than maybe anyone else. He had seen the lightness in his step the next Sunday after the first chance meeting at the coffee shop the week before. He saw the smile that crept onto his lips as he looked out of the living window to the corner where the coffee shop beckoned him. On that first Sunday, Lewis had been on the alert. McGarry never met anyone or spoke to anyone when he spent his Sundays sipping cappuccinos’ and reading. He had been somewhat amazed when Leo, more than once, threw back his head and laughed. Lewis had never seen him do that, ever.   
Lewis knew who the woman was. He had taken her picture and sent it to the office for a face recognition search. She was found quickly as she was a government employee named Nan Gray. A rather higher up employee, reporting directly to Nancy McNally at State. Lewis had immediately notified Ron Butterfield. A search and a background check later Lewis was told she presented no threat and to leave it at that. He was to say nothing, act like he knew nothing and let things proceed.  
On the third Sunday Leo was jittery with anticipation as he dressed and waited for Lewis and Cruze to dismiss the night crew after a short briefing. Lewis and Cruze watched from across the streets as Leo and Nan spent the first two hours talking and laughing. Then her phone rang and after she ended the call, she stood up. They spoke for a moment more then she left, again not looking back as she walked down the street.  
Then yesterday morning it all fell apart and today Leo McGarry had lost the spring in his step and the armor was drawn back tightly around his shoulders.   
He slipped, almost comfortably, back into his old routine. The last three weeks had been hell for all involved, most of all Margaret. She knew he was sleeping less than he ever had before, leaving him in the office at one or two in the morning only to find him at his desk when she came in at 5:30 in the morning. He wasn’t eating and his clothes were hanging from his hips and shoulders. His temper was as short as it had ever been. He growled out responses to questions and he barked at everyone. The senior staff were all walking around on eggshells around him. Even the President was not immune from Leo’s moods. Margaret was terrified if one more thing went wrong her boss would dive headfirst back into the bottle he had crawled out of.

Donna and Margaret huddled at a table in the far corner of the mess having lunch. They leaned toward each other as they talked so no one could overhear their conversation.   
“Do you have any clue why he has been so awful lately,” Donna asked?  
Margaret shook her head. “I don’t know. I am so worried. For a few weeks there, a month ago I thought something had happened – something good – like maybe he met someone. I caught him humming a few times and he actually laughed when I called him on it.”  
“Laughed,” Donna asked with a wide-eyed look? Leo humming was not something she could imagine.   
“He actually kind of lit up and looked, well, happy. He said of course he was humming. It was a beautiful day.”  
“Was it?”  
“What?”  
“A beautiful day?”  
Margaret snorted. “No. It was raining cats and dogs and it was shaping up to be the Monday from hell.”  
“Wow. I wonder what happened to change that and make him so angry and unhappy?”  
At that moment Ginger walked into the mess and saw Margaret and Donna. She moved over to their table. “Margaret, you better get back. Leo has been bellowing for you for ten minutes and he stalked out of his office a minute ago. I think he is hunting you down.”  
“WHAT? He knew I was going to lunch,” she said as she started to gather her things and the sandwich and Coke she had gotten for Leo’s lunch.  
Everyone in the mess jumped when Leo strode in, saw Margaret and yelled loudly, “WHERE the HELL have you been? I have been calling for you for…”  
Margaret stood up and faced Leo. “You knew where I was going. I told you I was going to lunch and here is where you have found me. I said that I would be back in thirty minutes. It has been fifteen. And here is your DAMNED lunch,” she yelled back at him and thrust the sandwich and can at him. Margaret fled the room. The can of soda fell out of his hands and hit the floor at his feet, cracking open and spewing foam over his pant leg.  
Donna stood up and glared at him. She handed him a napkin from the table and followed after Margaret. The murmurs in the mess started up again as people threw cautious glances at Leo who just stood looking at the mess on the floor.

When Leo got back to his office Margaret was nowhere to be seen. Leo wandered into his office and just stood there in the middle of the room, lost, and wondering why he was lost, wondering why he acted like this and hating himself for it. Wondering what deficiency in his make-up, what thing he lacked, made him lash out and hurt others. It sickened him, yet he couldn’t stop. He flinched when the door connecting to the Oval burst open. The President stalked in and slammed the door behind him.  
“WHAT THE HELL, LEO? What the hell is wrong with you? Your sunny personality has just about alienated EVERYONE. Margaret has put up with a hell of a lot from you. I don’t know how. The woman must be a saint. She’s with Mrs. Landingham right now crying her eyes out. You don’t deserve her,” he ran out of breath and stopped then drew in a sharp breath when he saw Leo’s face. All the anger dropped from him. He grabbed Leo’s arm and moved him over to the couch and sat him down then sat on the coffee table in front of him.  
His voice softer this time he asked,” Leo? What is wrong?”  
Leo gazed back at him, the heaviness, the weariness in his eyes so evident Jed wondered how he had missed it. A single tear slipped down Leo’s cheek and he sighed as if it were his last breath. He flopped back on the couch like a rag doll and closed his eyes.  
“Go away, Mr. President. GO AWAY, Jed. I’m toxic. I’m no good for anyone. My life is a shambles and I am gonna die a miserable old drunk has been and honestly, it’s really more than I deserve.”   
Jed drew in a shaky breath. This was the worst he had seen Leo in years, before rehab, when he had been at his lowest. “Leo, my god. What has happened? What has you in this state? Have you been, have you had a drink?”  
Leo barked out a sharp laugh. “Believe it or not, the last thing I crave right now is a drink. I crave…” Leo’s voice trailed off.  
Jed waited for him to continue. “What Leo? What do you crave?”  
“I…I crave what I can’t have. I crave what I don’t deserve. She’s…” He stopped and gulped and stood up brushing past the President to go sit at his desk. “Leave me, please,” the last word a strangled plea. He turned his chair toward the window and listened to the door click closed softly behind him.

“I’m fine, Mr. President. Really. It just got the best of me today. He needs me to keep things running. I’m fine,” Margaret assured the President as she tidied her desk with nervous hands.  
“Margaret?”  
“Really sir, it’s okay.” Margaret sighed. He really doesn’t mean it. He doesn’t. His demons take over and he doesn’t really know how he hurts people.”  
“You know him too well. Okay. But you look exhausted. Please, go home soon.”  
“I will.”

A few hours later Margaret went into the office. Leo had not moved from his chair or turned away from the window.   
“I am going home Leo.”  
“Okay,” Leo paused. I really am sorry Margaret.”  
“I know,” and she left, softly closing the door.

Leo finally came to himself with a deep shuddering breath and looked at the clock on his desk. It was 4:01 am. He felt like he had been physically beaten with a baseball bat. The headache making its presence known with a vengeance, pulsated behind his eyes. His chest hurt, ached, behind his breastbone, like he had been punched hard. His neck was stiff and his face felt pinched and dry where the tears that had flowed during the night had dried. He reached up with both hands and rubbed his face, surprised to feel the amount of stubble there. ‘Jesus, how long have I been…’  
He heard the door to the Oval open and from the corner of his eye saw the President approach his desk. He kept his eyes down and was dismayed to see his hands shaking. He didn’t stand. He couldn’t stand.  
“Leo. Please. C’mon, let’s get you up to the residence. Set you up in a guest room. You need to sleep.”  
‘No. I can’t go there. Abbey doesn’t want me anywhere near the residence.’ Even with her gone, he couldn’t bear to go against her wishes. Leo shook his head. “No, no. Staff is at 7:30. I need to…”  
“Leo. It’s Saturday.” Leo looked up, confused. His mouth opened and closed, his head tilted to the side as he tried to remember.  
“I, I…I don’t remember Friday. What…?”   
“It’s probably best you don’t,” Jed said.   
“What happened,” Leo asked searching his face.  
“Nothing. Do not worry about it. Look, if you won’t go to the Residence, at least get your driver or your detail to take you to the Watergate. You need to rest. Go home and sleep.”  
Leo shook his head. “Don’t live there anymore,” he said rubbing his face, trying to clear his head. Lewis. Lewis will take me home. He can…” Leo trailed off as his eyes fluttered closed.  
“Leo? What do you mean you don’t live there anymore? Leo?” Jed lightly shook his arm.  
“Where do you live now Leo? An apartment, a condo?”  
Leo growled and pulled his arm away. “Doesn’t matter. Just…Lewis can take me.” Leo’s head fell back in the chair. He was so tired. He couldn’t think anymore.  
The President watched him for a moment then picked up the phone on Leo’s desk and punched a few numbers. “Connect me with the Secret Service night officer, please.”  
“Sir,” the agent in charge answered.  
“Is Agent Lewis, Mr. McGarry’s detail, available?”  
“I am sorry sir. Agent Lewis is in charge of Mr. McGarry’s detail and he works the day shift and usually reports directly to Mr. McGarry’s residence, sir. His night shift agent is here in the office awaiting a call from Mr. McGarry to return home. Agent Goodson, sir.”   
The President looked at Leo who still had his eyes closed. “Leo. Agent Goodson?”  
“No. No, get Lewis. Please, he knows…”  
“No. Please contact Agent Lewis and get him to Mr. McGarry’s office.” He listened for a moment. No. It is not an emergency. Just get him here.”  
He placed the phone in the cradle softly as he watched Leo. His head had fallen to the side and his breathing had deepened. He was asleep. Or passed out.

Thirty minutes later Agent Frank Lewis stepped into Leo’s office. He snapped to attention when he saw the President sitting on Leo’s couch with a file in his lap, reading.  
“Sir,” he said as he looked over to the desk where Leo was sleeping in the chair.   
“Lewis, is it?”  
“Sir,” Lewis nodded.  
“Sorry to get you here early, but he wanted you,” the President explained as he stood. Take him home. You obviously know where that is,” he said with a raised eyebrow.  
“I do, sir. And it is obviously not my place to give you that information,” he answered the unvoiced question. Not without the protectee’s permission, sir.”   
Bartlet gave Lewis an appraising look, tapping his foot impatiently, then waved his arm dismissively. “Alright. Get him outta here before anyone starts to show up. You have a car here?”  
“Sir. Agent Cruze is second on the detail and he is waiting outside with the car. Can we remove him through the Oval? We can exit to the outside to the car and exit the Southwest gate.”  
“Good. Yes.” Bartlet watched Lewis move to Leo’s side while he spoke in his wrist mic. Another agent stepped into the room. He saw the President. “Goodson, Sir,” he said without stopping. He gathered up Leo’s coat and briefcase.  
“Leave the briefcase, he is not going to work this weekend,” the President said.  
Goodson put the briefcase back down and moved to Leo’s other side. Lewis was shaking Leo’s shoulder gently and he lifted his head. He screwed up his eyes and squinted at him.  
“Frank?”  
“Yes sir. It’s okay sir. I am gonna get you home now. Can you stand?”  
Leo leaned forward as if to stand and fell back into the chair with a grunt. Lewis and Goodson grabbed him under the arms and moved him from behind the desk. “Okay, sir. Walk. We’ll hold you up.” Leo shuffled forward while the agents bore most of his weight.  
They moved him through the Oval to the exit to the Colonnade. President Bartlet stopped them with a hand on Lewis arm. “Leo,” he stepped close to Leo and spoke into his ear softly while he cupped his face in his hand. “Leo, please rest. Please, get some sleep.”  
Leo nodded his head and sagged between the two agents. He looked Lewis in the eye.  
“I don’t want to see him here before Monday morning, and then only if he is looking a lot better and has had sleep. I will resist sending a doctor to him, as I do not know where he lives, but if I feel I have to, I will demand Ron Butterfield reveal that information.”  
“Yes sir. I will be giving Agent Butterfield hourly updates over the weekend sir. He can keep you informed.”  
“Fine.” Leo mumbled and sagged even more. “Go.”


	3. Chapter III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> By noon Leo had waded through all the papers, the New Yorker magazine, Forbe’s and finally threw down the Time’s crossword in irritation. Four cups of coffee had left him jittery and even after all the sleeping he had done the last two days, he couldn’t stop yawning. He got up and paced the apartment like a caged animal. He paced the apartment from the sunroom to his office and back again. After several circuits he threw up his hands and yelled, “Lewis?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The saga continues...this is likely to be long. I started this as a NaNoWriMo project and finished up on Nov 31 with 96,000 words. I am still going.  
> Some feedback would be great as I have never really written much in fan fiction, but I am a huge Leo/John Spencer fan and to write about him was too much an opportunity too pass up.

CHAPTER III

Leo rolled over and snuggled even deeper into the down comforter, pulling it up around his ears. He woke for a moment, barely noticing it was dark out and fell back to sleep. Lewis heard him moving from the living room and stepped into the bedroom. He watched Leo move, raise his head, then drop back into sleep. He blew out a sigh of relief. It was 9:00 pm on Saturday night and Leo had been sleeping for sixteen hours. Lewis couldn’t believe he had not even woken up to use the bathroom. He was probably dehydrated and Lewis made a mental note to make Leo drink a lot of water when he woke. He went back into the living room and settled onto the sofa and pulled out his cell phone.  
“Sir. Yes, he is still sleeping. Yeah, sixteen hours now. No, he is not in any distress. He was stirring a few minutes ago and turned over, but went back to sleep. His breathing seems okay and he is not feverish. I know he has had minimal sleep over the last couple weeks. I think his system just called it quits. He needs to sleep.” Lewis listened for a few minutes, nodding his head. Yes, sir. I will let you know when he is up.” Lewis closed his phone then settled back onto the sofa to read.

The smell of coffee crept into Leo’s awareness, slowly leading him back to the land of the living. He dragged his eyes open and raised his head from the pillow. It was obviously early morning and he was also obviously not alone as he spied the steaming cup on his nightstand. He sat up slowly and stretched, his shoulders and neck popping from the effort. He reached for the coffee cup and slurped the black, hot brew.  
“Aw, god. That’s heaven,” he groaned out loud. He saw movement out of the corner of his eye and turned his head toward the doorway. “Good morning, Mr. McGarry. How are you feeling,” Lewis asked as he came into the room?  
Leo groaned. “Like I was beat senseless, then woken up and beat again.” Leo took another gulp of coffee and swung his legs over the side of the bed, realizing he was clad in only his boxers. His eyebrows went up as he looked at Lewis who’s face betrayed nothing. Leo lifted the cup to take another drink and realized the cup was empty.  
Lewis held out his hand for the cup. “Go shower sir. I will have coffee and breakfast waiting when you are done.”  
“Coffee’s good, but I am not hungry,” he said as he rose from the bed slowly.  
“Great, sir. Coffee and breakfast coming up.” Leo started to give him a look, but when he saw Lewis’s face he just muttered. “Yeah. Thanks.”

Leo was so long in the shower Lewis knocked on the door to check on him.  
“Did you drown in there, sir? I do know mouth to mouth.”  
“Ha, ha. You’re a comedian Lewis.”  
“Then get out of there and come eat, SIR.”  
Leo shook his head at the exchange. He liked Lewis, but this was just too much. He dressed in a pair of ragged, faded Levi’s and an equally faded and ragged Michigan sweatshirt and walked out into the living room. He squinted at the bright light coming in through the wall of floor to ceiling windows on the east side of his apartment. He saw a blanket on his sofa and a book, newspaper and cell phone on his coffee table.  
“Been here all night Lewis? Sorry.” Leo shrugged up onto one of the tall stools that lined the breakfast bar and pass through into the kitchen. Lewis placed a plate onto the counter in front of Leo with scrambled eggs, toast and melon on it.  
“Been here since 5:00 am Saturday when we got you home, sir. It’s now 8:30 am on Sunday morning, “Lewis informed him. Leo choked on the mouthful of eggs he had just eaten. Lewis put a glass of water on the counter for him.  
“Sunday morning,” Leo squeaked as he tried to clear his throat. He took a big gulp of the water.  
“Yes sir.”  
Leo sat staring at the plate in front of him, trying to remember what the hell had happened over the last two days. He could remember none of it. He was still fuzzy and his head still pounded. He rubbed his forehead. Lewis filled his coffee cup for the third time and Leo drank half of it in one gulp.  
“Geez. Lewis…”  
“Sir.”  
“Look Lewis…”  
“Sir,” Lewis stopped him. I am not here to judge you in any way. My job it to protect you. Keep you alive. Keep you out of trouble. My job is to keep you out of danger sir, even when that danger is you.”  
Leo snapped up his head and stared at Lewis. “Lewis. Frank, I…”  
“It is not my place to judge, Mr. McGarry. It is my job to protect. And I take that job very seriously…Leo.” Leo caught the half smile on Lewis’s face and he felt a flash of affection for this man who had kept him from destroying himself and his career more than once. “Thank you.”  
Then something Lewis had said hit Leo like a sledge hammer. “Sunday morning? 8:30?” Suddenly Leo’s heart flipped over in his chest and a cold sweat broke out on his upper lip.  
Lewis knew exactly what Leo was thinking. He shook his head. “Not a good idea sir. I do not think she will be there.” He paused a moment, then admitted, “We have checked each Sunday to see if she showed up. She has not. Even if she did sir, I cannot let you go. It’s really not a good idea, not in your frame of mind right now.”  
Leo was working up a good angry retort to that, but stopped, all the fight suddenly draining away as quickly as it had built. His hand shook as he took another sip of coffee.  
“Yeah,” he whispered. I get it. But still, could Cruze…ya know,” he couldn’t finish.  
“Yes sir. He will check.”

She didn’t show up. Leo didn’t think she would, but he hoped. Oh how he had hoped she might. He stood in front of the open sliding glass doors that looked out to the north. There was a narrow balcony outside the doors and he watched the street corner where the coffee shop sat. After an hour Lewis moved him over to the sofa and settled him in with a pile of newspapers Cruze had bought that morning. Leo shuffled through the papers until he found the Times and then the crossword. Lewis kept refiling his water glass until Leo growled he was gonna wear a path in the tile to the bathroom, but did have to admit his headache was better. He worked the easier clues of the puzzle, but many of the clues seemed to elude him this morning.  
By one in the afternoon Leo was sound asleep in a nest of papers and magazines. CNN droned on in the background. Lewis turned off the television, removed the papers and covered Leo with a blanket he found in the spare bedroom closet. He then settled back into his chair and read his book. 

Lewis’s phone rang around 6:30 and he raised his eyebrows when he saw the White House on his caller ID. He was still surprised to hear the Presidents voice as he jumped to his feet to answer the call.  
“Mr. President, sir. Good evening.”  
“Evening Lewis. Is he awake?”  
“No sir. Still sleeping.”  
“How is he doing, Agent Lewis?”  
“Uh, exhausted, sir. Beyond exhausted. He did eat breakfast this morning and then sat up for a few hours watching CNN and looking at the paper. He fell asleep again around 11:30 and has been down ever since on the sofa. At shift change at 7:00 I am gonna get him into bed, hopefully for the night.”  
“I see. I am glad he is sleeping.” The President paused. “Lewis. You have spent more time with him lately than anyone else in or out of the White House. How do you think he is doing? Do you think he should come into work tomorrow?”  
Lewis paced from the living room into the dining room and beyond that to Leo’s study. “He is struggling, trying to make sense of this situation. Sir, I cannot be more specific. I am sorry but it is up to him to tell you what has been going on. It is not my place. I will tell you Mr. McGarry will push past this, in time. He is a strong man in that regard. He will get past the pain and the memories and he will be himself again.”  
“Is that a good thing, Agent Lewis,” Leo’s best friend asked softly. “Is it really for the best?”  
“Sir. It is not my place to judge or have opinions. I am here to protect him. I will do so sir.”  
“You like him, don’t you Lewis?”  
He didn’t answer right away. He thought about the last year, the move out of the Watergate (finally), seeing Leo become more relaxed in his new home, actually wanting to go home evenings, meeting Nan Gray. He had seen a side of Leo McGarry he didn’t know existed. He had seen him laughing, spending hours in lively conversation with a beautiful woman. He had been happy, like a kid at Christmas for a few Sunday mornings. Then it was gone.  
“Yes sir.” Lewis could almost feel the President’s nod through the phone.  
“Do you think he needs more…”  
“Sir. I am sure that is not my call.”  
“Do-you-think he needs a few more days?”  
“We could all use a ‘few more days’ sir.”  
“Good answer,” the President chuckled. “Okay. My call. He stays home Monday and Tuesday and if he hasn’t killed you by then, you can bring him in Wednesday. My orders. Tell him I said so.”  
“Yes sir.”  
“Thank you, Lewis. Keep him safe.” The President hung up the phone.  
‘Yes sir. I will.’

The night shift agents Goodson and Blake arrived at the apartment shortly before 7:00 pm. Lewis filled them in on the day and what the President had said about Leo’s banishment from the White House. He then went over to the sofa and gently shook Leo’s shoulder until he groaned.  
“What? Oh, hey, Lewis. Oh God, what…where…” Leo muttered as he struggled to sit up on the sofa. When he managed to sit up and swing his feet to the floor he groaned and held his head in both hands.  
“Headache, sir?”  
“Oh lord. Yeah.” Leo raised his bleary eyes to the three men who stood before him. “What the hell,” he growled?  
“Let’s get you to bed, sir.” Lewis held out his hand but Leo swatted it away and tried to stand on his own. He made it half way and then fell back to the sofa. “SHIT.” He growled in pain and grabbed his lower back.  
“C’mon sir, you will be more comfortable in bed.” Goodson moved to his right side and the other agent, Blake, to his left. This time he let them help him stand.  
“God. What time is it?”  
“After 7:00 sir. You slept most of the day.”  
Leo looked panicked and started looking around for his phone. “I didn’t get any calls today? Nothing? Where is my phone?” “No sir. No calls. Your phone is on the coffee table,” Lewis called from the bedroom as Goodson led him by the elbow. Lewis didn’t tell him he had turned it off. He opened a few dresser drawers until he found the one with pajama pants and pulled out a pair. Leo was now sitting on the bed. “Do you need help?”  
Leo glared at him. “I think I can dress myself, Lewis.”  
“Do it then, sir. Are you hungry? All you had today was breakfast.”  
“And enough god damn water to float the fifth fleet. Jeez, move it Goodson, I gotta take a leak.” Leo grabbed the pants from Lewis and called back over his shoulder as went to the bathroom, “and no, I am not hungry.”  
Leo finished in the bathroom, pulled off his sweatshirt, threw it in the walk-in closet hamper and went to the bed. He lay back and pulled the covers up over his hips.  
“Good night, sir,” Lewis said as he turned off the lights.  
“Yeah. Whatever. 5:00 Lewis.”  
He said nothing and left the room. Twenty minutes later he stopped by Leo’s room before he left. Leo’s arms were sprawled out on the bed and he was softly snoring. Lewis pulled the door shut and left.

When Lewis arrived the next morning, he could hear Leo yelling when he got off of the elevator.  
“Where the HELL is my phone? Dammit, get it now.”  
Lewis entered the apartment to find Leo in the foyer with Goodson pushed up against the wall. Leo was shaking his fist in Goodson’s face. Goodson looked at Lewis with a bemused smirk. Lewis tilted his head toward the door and Goodson ducked under Leo’s fist and left.  
“I want my phone. What did he mean I am not allowed in the White house until fucking Wednesday? I need to call him and find out what the hell…what kind of bullshit...SON OF A BITCH…”  
Lewis just stood in the foyer and waited while Leo ranted and finally ran out of steam. Leo glared at Lewis, standing there in this pajama pants and bare feet. “Well?”  
“How about a shower? Then breakfast?”  
“GOD DAMMIT, Lewis,” Leo yelled and stared at Lewis for a long minute. “Yeah. Whatever,” he growled but made his way to the bedroom.  
Twenty minutes later he was sitting on the sofa in the living room, hair still wet and dressed in old khakis and a soft blue crew neck sweater. On his knees he balanced a plate of scrambled eggs and crunched a buttery slice of rye toast. “This is good Lewis. You’ll make someone a fine wife someday,” Leo grumbled but he smiled when he said it.  
“Thanks, sir,” Lewis smiled. “About the Wednesday thing; Presidents orders. I have no choice.”  
Leo swallowed the toast and took a gulp of coffee from the cup on the coffee table. “Yeah. He likes doing shit like that, the bastard,” Leo growled but he still had the smile on his face. So, what the hell am I gonna do for the next wo days. I’ll go bonkers sitting here with nothing to do.”  
“Take a nap.”  
“Shut up.”

By noon Leo had waded through all the papers, the New Yorker magazine, Forbe’s and finally threw down the Time’s crossword in irritation. Four cups of coffee had left him jittery and even after all the sleeping he had done the last two days, he couldn’t stop yawning. He got up and paced the apartment like a caged animal. He paced the apartment from the sunroom to his office and back again. After several circuits he threw up his hands and yelled, “Lewis?”  
The front door opened and Lewis walked into the living room with a bemused look. “Sir?”  
“Shut up. Look, if I don’t do something to burn off some of this nervous energy, and soon, I am gonna explode or something.”  
“Four cups of that sludge you brew will do that to you…sir.”  
Leo clenched his fists at his hips and his ears turned red.  
Lewis chuckled and then cleared his throat. “Sir? What do you suggest? What do you want to do?”  
“A walk? Some fresh air? I suppose a bike ride is out?”  
“Yes sir. I know you want to try out your new bike, but that is gonna take some planning and require a few more agents, so, not today. And besides, you are supposed to be resting.”  
Leo walked over to the sofa and dropped onto it. “How am I supposed to REST when I am so wound up I am…jeez, Lewis. A walk?”  
Lewis considered him for a moment. “I will be back shortly,” he said as he left the apartment. Fifteen minutes later he knocked on the door and came back in carrying a small duffle bag. “Okay. Here’s the deal. The building has a gym. Management is closing it for the next two hours for us to use uninterrupted. They have treadmills, some weights and exercise bikes and TV’s. So, hop on a bike, put in some mileage, watch CNN. That’s my deal.”  
Lewis stood and waited for a response. He was almost ready to turn and leave when Leo gave in. “Okay. Fine.” He went to his room and came out a few minutes later dressed in pull on cotton gym shorts, his Foo Fighters shirt and sneakers. He stopped in front of Lewis and did a 360-degree pirouette with his arms out and a smirk on his face.  
“Lovely,” Lewis said with his own smirk and opened the apartment door.  
Two hours later Leo limped into the apartment after Lewis ran a sweep through it. He was drenched with sweat and his right leg and hip were screaming. He rubbed his hip and caught his breath. “Guess I over did the last couple of miles,” he groaned and flexed his knee.  
“I gotta say, I am impressed Mr. McGarry.”  
“Thought I was an old fart, didn’t ya.”  
Lewis laughed, “Never, sir.”  
“Use the guest bath. You don’t need to dress all sweaty. I won’t tell,” Leo said as he headed for his own bathroom.  
“Thank you, sir. I will as soon as I get Cruze on the door.”  
Leo waved his arm without turning around.  
After his shower Lewis went into the living room expecting to see Leo, but he wasn’t there, or in the sunroom or his office. He went down the hall toward his bedroom, past the bathroom and didn’t hear the shower, so he should be out. He went into the bedroom and saw Leo sprawled on the bed, in his boxers, feet on the floor and his arms flung out over his head. A pair of clean sweatpants was hooked over his foot but lay on the floor. He had tried to get dressed, but gave up and laid back on the bed and was asleep before he knew it.  
Lewis pulled the pants off of his foot and lifted his legs up on the bed. He grabbed a throw off of the chair by the window, covered Leo and closed the blinds. He left, pulling the door behind him.

Leo’s nose twitched. He reached up and rubbed it hard and inhaled slowly stretching his arms over his head. He raised his head and looked around the room, trying to remember how he had wound up here in bed. He looked to the window and saw it was early evening. Then he smelled coffee and the tantalizing aroma of what had to be pizza.  
He dragged himself out of bed and raised an eyebrow when he saw he was clad in only his boxers. He pulled on the sweatpants and shirt he saw at the foot of his bed. He shuffled into the living room rubbing sleep out of his eyes. He saw Lewis in the kitchen placing a pizza box in the wall oven.  
“He looked over when he saw Leo. “Good. You’re up. I was sticking this in here to stay warm. You want some?”  
“Is that a…” Leo started to ask as his mouth watered.  
“Yup. With sheep sausage,” Lewis answered as he got a plate from the cupboard and dished up two slices. He handed it to Leo through the pass-through along with a mug of coffee. He cocked his head as a message came through his earpiece.  
“Okay, sir. Goodson and Blake are here,” he said as he went to the door to let them in. They entered the apartment and split left and right as Goodson went to Leo’s bedroom and Blake went to the guest bedroom and office. Then met in the living room a minute later and Goodson stopped to talk to Lewis as Blake went to check the sunroom and the laundry room beyond that.  
“Okay, sir. All set for the night. Are you feeling okay?”  
“Yeah. I am kinda sore, but I am okay. I will eat dinner, watch some TV and I promise I will be in bed by midnight, Dad.”  
Lewis smirked. “See you in the morning.” He walked out with Goodson and Blake. Leo settled in to watch CNN. He got up once to get more pizza and refill his coffee cup. By 11:30 he was sound asleep on the couch.  
When Goodson came in for the 2:00 am sweep he woke Leo and sent him to bed.

It was finally Wednesday and Leo was shaving, ready to get back to work. One more day of relaxation and he would have needed a padded cell. But, he felt half human and god, if he didn’t feel rested. He chuckled, ‘I should be. I have slept two of the last four days.’ He finished dressing, opting for his favorite dark navy suit, crisp white shirt and blue and white tie with matching suspenders and pocket square. He brushed his teeth, checked his hair and decided he was presentable.  
Ten minutes later he was strolling into Margaret’s office looking for his messages. Margaret came out of his office just then.  
“Well. The prodigal returns.”  
“Shut up. Where are my messages?”  
“On your desk. There are twenty that need to be addressed ASAP, and then another 40 to get through after that, staff in ten, Stackworth at 8:00, the hill at 9:00 with the Speaker, Nancy McNally and Admiral Fitzwallace need to see you at 10:30 and then after that it all goes to hell. Hope the vacation was worth it,” Margaret got out all in one breath.  
“Gee, thanks Margaret. Missed you too.”  
She harrumphed and followed Leo into the office.

The day flew by and before Leo knew it the sky had darkened, the West Wing had emptied and once again he sat alone in his office under a stack of files, briefs, reports and polling data. He was now two full days behind on everything and he was plowing his way through a brief on the upcoming summit. He wiggled his hips in his chair and winced when his back pinched. He was getting just too damn old to be sitting in a chair for hours on end.  
He stood up and made a few circuits around his office, stopping to shake his aching right leg after each lap. He was bending forward with his hands on his knees trying to stretch the kink in his back when he heard the Oval office door open and a set of familiar shoes wandered into his field of vision and he heard the President chuckle.  
“One moment sir, Leo said as he stretched his muscles one more time and then slowly stood upright with his hands on his hips. Okay.”  
“What are you doing? And by the way, you look much better Leo. Not so grey and sallow looking.”  
“Why thank you, sir, I think,” Leo said sarcastically as he went over to his favorite chair by the window. The President sat in the chair opposite the coffee table. Leo moaned again as he adjusted his hips in the chair. The President raised an eyebrow.  
Leo’s mouth tightened as he looked away for a moment and rubbed behind his right ear. “I challenged Lewis to a race on Monday on stationary bikes in my apartments gym. I am still paying for it,” Leo admitted as he rubbed his right hip.  
“Exercise? Wow. Where is Leo McGarry and what have you…”  
“Oh knock it off,” Leo growled.  
“But exercise,” the President teased?  
“Well, if you must know, after more sleep than I have had in the last month and being cooped up, banned from my place of employment, for two days I needed to work off some nervous energy or go nuts. So Lewis got the management to close the gym for a couple hours for us. My building has a couple of Senators, Congressman and lobbyists as residents as well and they are very accommodating when it comes to security issues.”  
“So, this new place? When did you move? Why didn’t you tell me?”  
Leo sighed. “I meant to, it just never seemed to come up at the right time. And it was about 6 months ago. Mallory had been bugging me again about getting out of the Watergate. I was just browsing online for available apartments. I saw the listing for this one and I really liked it. So I bought it, also more to shut up Mallory than anything.”  
“Where is it? Close by?”  
“Less than a mile. 22nd St. and P, a few streets west of DuPont Circle. It’s a penthouse apartment, great views, two bedrooms, two and a half baths, sunroom, office, a wall of windows on the east. It’s about two thousand square feet. Now that I am there, I love it.”  
Jed sat back and smiled. He missed just talking with his old friend like this.” I’m glad Leo. You really needed to get a place of your own. So?”  
“What?”  
“C’mon, Leo. What happened? What sent you into what I would call a pretty nasty depression a few weeks ago. Something hurt you, Leo. You muttered something about a she?”  
Leo snapped his eyes to Jed’s. “I did,’ he asked as he fidgeted with the buttons on his suit coat?  
“Yeah, ya did,” Jed said quietly. He drew in a concerned breath when he saw Leo’s eyes grow glassy with unshed tears. “Leo…”  
He shook his head and swiped a hand across his eyes. “I’m not sure I can talk about this right now. I just need a little time…”  
“Is she…”  
“No Jed. Please. It’s over, really almost before it began. I just need time…to process this…” Leo sighed and shrank back in his chair.  
“Okay. Okay. You know…if you wanna talk…I am here for you, Leo.”  
Leo nodded. “Yeah. Thanks.”  
After the President left, Leo went back to his desk and glanced at the clock. It was 11:15. He looked at the pile of files on his desk and then back at the clock. ‘Screw it.’ He closed the file he had been reading and shoved it into his briefcase along with a few others and a briefing book on lumber in the southwest. He turned off his desk lamp, walked over and pulled on his coat, grabbed the briefcase and opened the door to Margaret’s office. He strode out and swept past her and yelled “Go home” over his shoulder as he sauntered down the hall.

A few mornings later when Leo arrived for work, in addition to his briefcase, he carried a small duffle bag. He tossed it on the table in his office, hung his coat and dropped his briefcase next to his chair. Margaret eyed the bag as she walked into the office and over to Leo’s desk with the mornings first messages.  
She put the stack of messages on his desk and then walked over to the bag on the table. “Did you bring spare clothes Leo? I can put them in the closet with your spare suit.”  
“Leave it, Margaret.”  
“Okaaay.”  
“Get Berryhill on the phone. Now, please.” Margaret tossed him a look and went to her office to place the call. Ten minutes later when he ended his call Josh strolled in for senior staff followed by Toby, then CJ and finally Sam.  
“The President is on a call this morning and won’t be available for staff. Anything going on I need to know about?” No one spoke up so Leo shuffled the files around on his desk and handed one to Josh.  
“I was just on the phone with Berryhill about this. Look into it.”  
“But Leo, I don’t do international…”  
“Josh. Just do it. This may have domestic consequences.”  
“A-kay.”  
“CJ? All set for the summit? What about that problem with seating for the international press contingent?”  
“Fixed. No problems.”  
“Okay. Toby? Speech?”  
“Sam and I are polishing.”  
“We need to do a read through later with the President, see how it flows.”  
“Okay.”  
“Okay, then. Go away.” Leo sat down and put on his glasses and opened a briefing folder.  
CJ looked at Toby who shrugged and they shuffled out. Toby followed CJ to her office after she beckoned him with a finger. She sat down in her chair and sighed.  
“God, Toby. What the hell? He is just not being Leo.” Toby sat on her couch. He seems so sad, Toby. That’s what it is. He seems sad and lost. Margaret says he is rested and even left early last night. He doesn’t fight when she brings him food, but he is just, I don’t know. It’s like his light has just dimmed. He’s going through the motions but his heart isn’t in it. My God, Toby. We can’t do this without him.”  
“Are he and the President okay,” Toby asked? You know how Leo gets when they are fighting.  
“Who knows. He keeps everything to himself, all bottled up. It was pretty crazy he took those days off. He was gone all weekend until Wednesday.”  
“I heard the President ordered him home. Something happened on Friday after he blew up all over Margaret.”  
“Yeah. That was bad. Really bad.”  
“Yeah.” “Yeah.”

At 12:30 Margaret flew into the bullpen and grabbed Donna. “We need to talk. NOW,” she whispered as she dragged Donna to the ladies’ room.  
“Oh my God,” Margaret breathed as she grabbed Donna. You are not gonna believe this.”  
“What? What,” Donna gasped as she tried to extricate her shoulder from Margaret’s grip.  
“About fifteen minutes ago Leo came out of his office on his cell phone. He told me to go to lunch and that he would be back in an hour. He was carrying that duffle bag I told you about. Then I heard him say into his phone, and I quote, ‘okay, Lewis. I am free. I will meet you at the gym.’ I almost fell over.”  
“Oh Margaret, you misunderstood. Leo, at the gym?”  
“I could not believe it either, so I followed them.”  
“You didn’t.”  
“I did. And watched until they actually went into the gym,” Margaret said nodding her head.  
“Wow. Well, good for Leo,” Donna said and left the ladies room to go back to her desk.  
“Donnnaaaaaa,” Josh yelled as he walked past her desk. I’ll be in Leo’s office for a few minutes. ‘Be back.”  
“Josh. No. Margaret said he is in the gym.”  
Josh stopped dead in his tracks and slid a few feet further. He turned and looked at her. “What did you say?”  
“Leo’s at the gym. Margaret told me.”  
“No, no. Leo doesn’t do gym. Where is he really?”  
“Go ask Margaret. She even followed him. He really is in the gym. And I say good for Leo.”  
Josh hurried over to Toby’s office. “You are not gonna believe this.”  
“Go away, Josh. I am busy.”  
“Leo went to the White House gym. He is there now.”  
“Josh, get out of…what did you say? Are you nuts?”  
“Swear to god. Margaret confirmed it.”  
“No way.”  
“No way, what,” Sam asked as he walked in.  
“Leo went to the gym.”  
Sam broke out laughing but stopped when he saw Josh and Toby’s faces.  
“No way. Leo doesn’t do gym. Or sweat, or, ya know.”  
“Who’s sweaty,” CJ asked as she walked in to see why everyone was in Toby’s office?  
“Leo.”  
“Well, he will be. Sweaty, that is,” Sam clarified.  
“Leo is in the gym,” Toby said.  
CJ burst out laughing. “Are you kidding me? No way. You’re not kidding. Oh my God.” She headed for the door. “Well, c’mon.” She held up her White House ID. “This gets us into the gym. We all have access. I go all the time.”  
They hurried through the halls until they came to the White House Fitness Center. CJ pointed to a door on the left of the glass double doors at the Center entrance. “Go in there. That’s the entrance to the men’s locker room. I’ll meet you in there.”  
Sam held his ID to the pad on the side of the door and it beeped. He pushed the door open while CJ beeped her way into the women’s entrance. She passed through the room and entered the fitness center proper. She walked over to the door to the men’s locker room and waited for the boys.  
“Do you see him,” Toby asked as they walked over to her?  
“Oh. He is over there,” CJ pointed to the row of stationary bicycles along the back wall. Leo and Lewis occupied the last two bikes in the row in the corner. Leo was up on his feet, pushing hard against the resistance of the belt that connected to the front wheel of the bike. He was pedaling for all he was worth and was drenched with sweat. Dark circles had grown under his arms and a wide swath of dark sweat ran from his neck to his waist. Beads of sweat were dropping from his eyebrows and upper lip.  
Lewis was pedaling just as hard, calling out words of quiet encouragement to Leo. They stood watching from across the room and could see Leo was going all out.  
“Do they have defibrillators here,” Josh asked under his breath?  
CJ whacked him in the back of the head. “From your mouth to…just shut up.”  
A few minutes later Lewis dropped onto the seat of his bike and raised his arms with a whoop. Leo sat down hard on the seat of his bike and let the continued motion of the wheel carry his legs around as it wound down while he sucked in oxygen. Lewis held out his hand and Leo gave him a high five.  
“Nice, sir. Good race,” Lewis said as he hopped off his bike to give Leo a hand. Leo got off the bike slowly and bent forward, hands on his knees, while he willed his heart rate to slow down to something that felt less like he was dying.  
Lewis dropped a towel over his shoulders and Leo mopped his face and head, leaving his hair a mess. He and Lewis talked as they crossed the room heading for the showers. They stopped dead in their tracks when they saw the Senior Staff waiting for them with bemused looks on their faces.  
“Hey Leo,” Josh said as he bounced on his feet. Nice legs.”  
CJ took in Leo and the soggy t-shirt with the White House logo and the gray cotton gym shorts. On his feet he had well used Nike’s with crew socks. She thought to herself he didn’t look half bad, sexy even. ‘Shit. Keep that to yourself’.  
“So, Leo,” Toby drawled. Trying to have a heart attack?”  
Leo glared at Toby and turned to look at Sam. Sam being Sam, smiled and patted Leo’s shoulder. “That was actually pretty impressive, Leo.”  
“What? The fact that I didn’t keel over dead? I know for a fact you all have work to do, so get outta here,” Leo growled as he went through into the locker room with Lewis. Toby, Josh and Sam followed them in while CJ headed over to the women’s locker room. They hung around while Leo opened his locker, grabbed a toiletries bag, kicked off his shoes and socks and went to the showers. Lewis just stood watching them with his hands on his hips until they got the hint and left.

“So Leo,” Admiral Fitzwallace rumbled as he walked up to Leo in the situation Room later that afternoon, I hear you are in training.”  
Leo rolled his eyes and looked over Fitz’ shoulder then back to his face. “Why does the fact that I am getting a little exercise seem to fascinate everyone. Jeez. Just drop it, would ya?”  
Fitz laughed and winked at Nancy McNally who had walked up to them.  
“What’s so funny?”  
“NOTHING,” Leo almost yelled and glared at Fitz. Fitz started to turn away from Leo and just past his shoulder Leo saw a group of people talking in the corner. ‘What? Oh my god,’ Leo whispered as he felt a familiar punch to his gut. He bent over it hurt so much. He had trouble taking in a breath and staggered slightly against his chair.  
Nancy reached out and took his arm. “Leo. Leo? Are you okay,” she asked as she helped him sit in his chair. He wiped a shaky hand across his face and tried to breath. “What’s wrong,” she asked again?  
He shook his head and wiped his hands on his pants. “Sorry, Nancy. I’m okay.”  
“You don’t look okay.”  
He pushed her hand away and stood up. “Nancy, uh. Who…the woman in the gray suit over there, with the yellow shirt, uh, who is she?”  
“What?” Nancy looked over at the group of people Leo nodded his head toward. “Oh. You have never met her? I am surprised. She works at State, under me in fact. She is our Chief Linguist. She is in charge of all the translators and translations we do. Plus, she is our cultural expert on Iran and Iraq. You really have never met her?” Nancy turned toward the group.  
“Nan? Could you come over here, please?” Nancy waved her hand at the woman. “Leo, what the heck,” she exclaimed as he turned his back and bumped his chair over her foot.  
The woman reached them and Leo slowly turned around. “Hi Nan. I just found out that you and Leo have never met. Leo, Nan Gray. Nan, Leo Mc…” her voice trailed off when she saw the looks on both Nan’s and Leo’s faces. ‘What the hell.’  
Leo looked shell-shocked and could not take his eyes off of Nan. She in turn, looked as shocked, and angry, and confused as well. Leo cleared his throat.  
“Hi Nan. I…nice to…uh, are you…” Leo stammered and pulled at his tie. I gotta go,” he groaned and almost ran from the room.  
Nancy looked at Nan and was shocked to see tears on her cheeks. Nancy reached out to touch her shoulder, but Nan turned and left the room as quickly as Leo had.

Nan reached her office in the Truman building just in time to hide behind her office door and burst into tears. She leaned against the door with her head back against it. She let her shoulder bag fall to the floor and didn’t notice when her files slipped out onto the floor. She took a few shaky steps to the visitor’s chair that sat next to her desk and slumped into it, shoulders shaking as she sobbed. ‘Damn…damn…damn,’ she silently swore.  
A light knocking at her door caused her to jump. She grabbed a tissue from the box on her desk and blotted at her tear streaked face. The door opened and Nancy McNally scooted in and locked the door behind her. She walked over and wrapped her arms around Nan’s shoulder and held her as she started to cry again. Nancy helped her up and walked her over to the couch under the wide window on the outside wall. She sat next to Nan and handed her another tissue.  
“Okay, girlfriend. Start talking.”  
Nan shook her head and blew her nose.  
“Come on, Nan. What the hell was that all about?”  
Nan swallowed. “Remember the guy I told you about? A month ago?”  
Nancy nodded. “Yeah the coffee shop guy. You were really liking this guy, a lot. You said you thought he was handsome, funny, smart, and even though he insisted on…oh, wearing a hat and sunglasses…” Nancy stopped and covered her mouth with her hand.  
“NO WAY.”  
Nan nodded and covered her face with her hands.  
“Shit,”  
Nan couldn’t help but giggle. “Yeah. Shit.”  
“What are you going to do?”  
“Nancy, you will not believe what happened. I didn’t tell you all of it, why I have not been back to see him.”  
“Okay, girl. Start talking.”

Leo stormed through the halls to his office, walked right past Margaret and slammed the door to his office so hard a small framed photo on the wall next to the door crashed to the floor and the glass shattered. Margaret jumped about three feet out of her chair. ‘Oh no. Now what?’ She stood and walked to the door and tried the doorknob but it was locked. Now she was worried. Leo’s door was never locked unless he had left for the day. She lightly knocked and called out. “Leo?”  
Leo ignored her and sat at his desk with his head in his hands. When the tears started he sat back in his chair and let his head fall back. Seeing her again brought it all back. The happiness he first felt when they spent time together, the joy of her laughter, her smile and then the horrible guilt and fear and loss when she ran from him. He wished he had not seen her. He could have forgotten…no, tried to forget, how she smiled, how she smelled, how she tipped her head and…’CHRIST.’ He never thought he would feel the way he did when he was with her. The anticipation he felt when he was away from her, the sweet longing and the warm cramp in his gut when he saw her.  
Now all he felt was sadness, despair that he finally blown his last chance. It was his last chance. He couldn’t do this again. He lost Jenny because he couldn’t put her anywhere close to first in his life and now he had lost Nan just because of who he was. No, not anymore. This was the last time he would put himself in the position of being hurt anymore. Call him a coward, but it just hurt too much and he was too old to go through this again.

The knocking on his door was becoming frantic when it invaded Leo’s consciousness. He jumped when it sounded like someone had kicked the door. ‘Shit.’ He dragged his hand over his face and pulled at his tear soaked collar. His head was pounding and he felt drugged as he stumbled to his feet. He limped over to the door and unlocked it. He had to jump back as the door swung open and an irate Margaret stormed into the room.  
“What the HELL, Leo,” she started to yell. Nancy McNally grabbed her arm and pulled her back into her office. Leo could hear whispered angry words as he stumbled over to his couch. He heard the door close and the lock click and Nancy came over and sat next to him on the couch. She didn’t say anything as she sat and watched Leo. He felt like squirming as she stared at him. After too many minutes of silence Leo shifted on the couch and looked at Nancy.  
“What? Why are you here?”  
“You look like hell, Leo.”  
“Well gee, thanks a bunch there, Nancy. What do you want?”  
“It’s nothing you did.”  
“Huh? What are you talking about?”  
“Leo. You didn’t do anything wrong, and it’s not because you are a horrible person, it’s not because you are Leo McGarry or any other reason. The problem is not with you, but with Nan.”  
“What do you know…”  
“Leo. I am her boss, but more importantly, I have been her friend for twelve years. She is one of my best friends. I knew she was seeing someone. Someone who she was becoming very attracted to, but I had no idea it was you. I just found out. I left Nan in her office in pretty much the same state you are in here.”  
“Is she okay?”  
Nancy leaned over and placed an arm around his shoulder. “She is upset. She told me what happened on that last Sunday you were together.” Leo flinched and tried to pull away.  
“Stop. Leo, again, it’s not your fault.”  
“Not my fault? I caused her a tremendous amount of pain. You didn’t see her…”  
“No. But I have been her friend a long time, and I know things you do not. Believe me when I tell you had you been any other public figure with your standing the result would have been the same. She likes you Leo, a lot. A LOT.”  
“Then why…”  
“It’s not my place to tell you. What I can tell you is this. When Nan found out who you were, in that first moment she saw what being with you would mean…Leo, let me finish. You are a public figure, a very prominent figure. Everything about you; your life, your past, the people in your life, is for public consumption. That scared the living daylights out of her. The press, TV, the camera flashes, the digging into private lives, the gossip, all of it. She is a very private person and has had some pretty awful things happen to her. She was so afraid of what her life could become if she were involved with you, she ran. She is still running. You have to help her stop running, Leo. She needs someone in her life and you’re lucky I like you Leo. Because I think you are just the guy she needs.”  
“What has happened to her?”  
“Not for me to tell you. Just do this Leo. She wants to meet you again. She needs to explain. She wants to. And I am hoping you two can work it out. Next Sunday at the coffee shop. Nine in the morning. Be there for her Leo. Do not allow this to fade away.”  
Leo had almost stopped breathing while Nancy talked and he took in a deep shaky breath when she finished. He looked at Nancy and saw she had a smile on her face.  
“Thank you. I will be there. Nothing will keep me away. I promise.”  
Nancy held out a hand to Leo when she stood and helped to his feet. She stepped up and gave him a gentle hug then unlocked the office door and left. Leo went back over to his desk and dropped in his chair as Margaret swooped back into the room. She rushed up to his desk and just stood and stared at him. Leo had to chuckle at the look Margaret’s face.  
“Margaret, I am okay. I’m okay now. I am. How about a coffee and a sandwich?” He smiled to himself knowing Margaret would be more than happy to feed him, and darn it if he wasn’t hungry, for the first time in days


	4. Chapter  IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Margaret, I have to go to State. I’ll be at the Truman building.” Leo walked past her desk as he pulled on his coat.  
> “WHAT? How long? Leo, you have an appointment,” Margaret yelled as she followed him down the hall.  
> “Cancel it,” Leo yelled back at her over his shoulder.

CHAPTER IV

Leo woke up Sunday morning before sunup. He lay in bed watching as the sky slowly lightened, thinking about the last week. He had plodded through every day, getting the job done. He didn’t yell at anyone and tried to be as patient as he could. He even tried smiling and saying good morning, but that had only scared Margaret and made CJ stare at him warily. He was so glad when Friday night rolled around he almost sagged with relief when he finally told Margaret to shut everything down and go home.  
Saturday had been a short day with just a short meeting that ended before noon. Leo went home and decided to visit the coffee shop for an hour or two. He had been way for weeks and missed sitting and reading in the open air. He spent a few quiet hours then went back home. He spent the rest of Saturday pacing the apartment. He finally asked Lewis to go to the gym with him and he felt better after he burned off some nervous energy. He fell asleep on the sofa dreaming of Nan.  
When he could begin to make out detail in the trees outside his window he decided it was time to get up and face the day. Today he would see Nan again and he was both terrified and so excited he was shaking. He heard the front door open and Lewis called out into the apartment softly in case Leo was still asleep,  
“I’m up, Lewis.”  
“Okay sir.” He walked into the room and opened the closets, checked the bathroom and then went back out into the living room. He was speaking into his wrist as he checked the other rooms. “All clear, sir. I’ll be outside.”  
Leo went into the kitchen and started a pot of coffee brewing and then went to shower. By 7:30 he was on his second cup of coffee, even after changing 5 times. He had finally settled on what he started with, a newer pair of stonewash 501 Levi’s and a tucked in pale pink, well-worn Drake’s button down shirt. He rolled the cuffs to his elbows, slid a Brooks’ Brothers braided leather belt through the loops on his jeans and then slid his favorite Tommy Bahama flip flops on his feet. He paced the living room, stopping to look out of the windows to the north and down to the coffee shop on the corner.  
He blew out a breath and walked back into the living room and through to his office. He turned on his laptop and sat down. Maybe if he tried to do a little work the time would pass, ‘cause right now molasses in January would be movin’ faster.’ He opened a folder on his desktop and started to read.  
The knock at his door a little over an hour later startled him. Lewis walked into the apartment and called his name.  
“In the office, Lewis.”  
“Almost 9:00, sir. Would you like to head down?”  
“Whew. Yeah. Uh, gimme a minute.” Leo shut down his computer and rubbed his hands down his face. ‘Okay. This is it. Shit, I am scared stupid.’  
“Okay, Lewis. Ready or not, I guess,” Leo said as he stood up and went into the foyer.  
“Hey, Mr. McGarry. Looking good.”  
Leo smirked and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah. Right. C’mon, let’s go.”

Leo entered the coffee shop right at 9:00, minus the hat. He had tucked one arm of the sunglasses in his open collar. He walked up to the counter where his favorite barista, Liz, looked at him and raised her eyebrows.  
“Mr. M! Wow. What can I say?” Liz smiled as she asked, The usual?”  
“How about just a cup of dark-roast this morning?”  
“Coming up, Mr. M.” Liz turned to pour a cup of coffee into a heavy bottomed mug. She started to walk toward him as he dug out his wallet, then she stopped and turned back around. When she came back she had two mugs of coffee. Leo raised his eyebrow and Liz nodded her head toward the front of the shop. He looked and saw her, pulling out a chair at their usual table.  
Leo gazed at her through the window, taking in the light blue linen pants she wore with a matching light-weight deep blue V-neck sweater. Her hair seemed to shimmer with more red-gold than ever in the sunlight.  
“Coffee’s on the house, Mr. M. Enjoy,” Liz smiled. Leo took the mugs and headed outside.  
Nan didn’t look up as he walked outside to their table and set the coffee mugs down. He pulled out the chair next to her, then just stood looking down at the top of her head. ‘God, she is beautiful.’ After a moment, she lifted her head and looked into his eyes. Her eyes were wide open and glassy with tears and Leo’s legs gave way as he dropped into the chair and scooted closer to her.  
“Nan? You gotta tell me you are okay with this. If you don’t want to do this, I will leave. I won’t be the cause of your pain. Tell me now.” Leo held his breath as she gazed into his eyes. Leo could hardly stand her silence and dropped his head and pushed back his chair to stand. He felt her hand on his, barely touching, a feathery brush of her fingers on the back of his hand. It took his breath away. He settled back down and raised his eyes to hers.  
“Stay,” she whispered.  
“I will.”  
“Thank you for the coffee,” she spoke softly and picked up her cup and sipped.  
“You’re welcome,” Leo said as he sipped from his mug.  
They sipped coffee, not talking. Leo’s eyes never strayed from hers. She wiped a single tear from her cheek as her eyes locked with his. When the coffee was gone, she set down her cup and took his from his hand and moved them to the edge off the table so she could lean across the table and take his hand in hers.  
“First, I wish you would put your glasses on. You could be recognized.”  
“I want to see your eyes, your face without…”  
“Leo, please. I do not want us to be recognized. Nancy told me she had told you part of my fears.”  
“I’m sorry. Okay,” Leo put on the glasses and reached out to take her hand again.  
“Leo, I, uh…I’m so sorry,” she whispered. I didn’t mean to make you think, you know, what you thought, about…darnit.” Nan stopped and pulled her hand from Leo’s and sat back in her chair.  
“Just say it Nan, whatever you need to. Just talk to me, please. Just be honest with me, tell me what troubles you, so I can tell you what troubles me…Yes, I am scared too. You have no idea…” Leo’s shoulders slumped.  
Nan took his hand again, this time with both of hers and she squeezed. “Leo, I have so much to tell you, but I am…uncomfortable, like this. Out in the open. Where we could be seen, or over heard.”  
“I understand. I agree.” Leo looked her in the eye and took a breath. I hope you do not think that I am being pushy, or planned this, or trying to…I don’t know…shit. But I live over there, the top floor apartment facing us.” he nodded his head back down the street toward the six story building a half block away.  
“If you are okay with it, if you trust me, we could go there to talk. At least we would have privacy. Lewis will right outside the door, so you could yell for him if…” Leo grinned when she giggled.  
“Yes, I am sure your agent would come to my rescue.”  
“I can guarantee he would. He would probably love to whoop my ass,” Leo couldn’t help but laugh.  
Nan dropped her head and watched her fingers fidget with the hem of her sweater.  
“Okay.”  
“You trust me, Nan? I promise we are only going to talk.”  
She nodded. “Okay.”  
Leo breathed a sigh of relief and looked over to where Lewis was standing on the curb across the street. He inclined his head and Lewis walked across the street and stepped up to the table.  
“Ms. Gray,” he tipped his head.  
“Lewis, Is it?”  
“Yes, Ma’am.”  
“Lewis, we are going to my apartment.”  
“Sir.’ Lewis spoke into his wrist and Leo saw Cruze acknowledge him and stand up. Cruze then walked to the corner and up P street a bit, then came back down and headed up 22nd toward the apartment building. Lewis nodded at Leo a minute later.  
“Clear, sir.”  
Leo stood and took Nan’s hand. She stood and stepped to his side. When he went to let go of her hand, she gripped it tighter, looking at him. In response he took her arm and entwined it with his. She leaned into him lightly as they walked down the street behind Lewis. Nan turned to watch as Cruze fell in behind.  
Leo was almost light-headed with the sensation of her hip lightly bumping his as they walked, her arm nestled up against his side. He wished he lived further away so he could have her arm in his longer, her hip brushing his for blocks as they walked. But, it was over minutes later when they went up the steps to his building. Nan stood slightly apart from Leo in the elevator, but took his hand when he offered it when they got to the top floor and exited the elevator.  
At his apartment door, Lewis opened the door with a key of his own key. He pushed the door open and spoke into his wrist mic, “Entering the apartment.” He stepped into the foyer. Nan started to follow and Leo stopped her. “Wait here. He has to clear the apartment before we can go in.”  
“Every time you come home.”  
“Yeah. Even if it has been 15 minutes,” he shrugged.  
“How…why, how do you put up with the intrusion, I mean, you have no privacy.”  
“Believe it or not, you really do get used to it. And Lewis and Cruze, they try very hard to be as low key and unobtrusive as possible. And I trust them implicitly. The Secret Service is very adamant that an agent never discusses his or her protectee. Ever. It erodes the trust. No one will ever find out a thing about you or me or us from Lewis or Cruze. Unless, it is a matter of my life and safety. That is their job.”  
“When that man, Butter something came to my apartment…”  
Leo whipped his head around and Nan jumped. “Butterfield. Ron Butterfield? When?”  
Nan was nervous now, like she had done something wrong. Leo saw this and squeezed her hand. “No. It’s okay. I am sorry. Just, what did he want?”  
“The day, the last time we were together, I was at home, and he came to my house. He came to tell me that I was going to notice that he had placed an agent to follow me. That if we were over it would not be for long, just to insure that I did not, I don’t know, bother you? He told me you had no idea who I was and it was not the place of the service to do so.”  
Leo was fuming. ‘Butterfield will be hearing from me, soon.’  
“How did you feel about that? My not knowing.” Leo saw her indecision and squeezed her hand again. No, it’s okay. It doesn’t matter now.” He smiled when he saw her relax a little.  
“Okay, sir. All clear.” Lewis opened the door all the way and let them enter. I will be at the door, sir. Ms. Gray. If you need me…?” Nan nodded her head and smiled at Lewis. He stepped into the hall and shut the door.  
“Can I give you a quick tour, so you know where things are? Ya know, like the bathroom?” Nan nodded her assent.  
“Okay, this is the grand foyer,” Leo swept his arm to indicate the grandness of the small space and Nan laughed. Leo had to stop for a moment and catch his breath. Her laugh left him breathless. “Okay, maybe not that grand.”  
He indicated the hallway to the left. This way is the opulent master suite,” Leo continued to exaggerate the grandness of his somewhat modest apartment. Here on the left, is the master bath, and then two walk ins,” he indicated left and right, past the bath. And this is the master bedroom.” She saw the king size bed flanked by night stands. A tall chest sat next to the window on the far wall and a low dresser stood alone on the wall to the right. A padded bench sat at the foot of the bed with the same black finish as the other furniture.  
He led her from his room back to the foyer, where he showed her the powder room by the front door and then led her through into an open area with the living room to the left and to the right a dining room. He led her through the dining room, past the cherry wood table with six chairs, and opened a door on the right. He let her enter first and she saw it was an office. He had a desk in the middle of the space with book shelves behind. A laptop sat on the desk along with a lamp. In the corner to the right a wing backed chair faced the desk. The he took her to the second bedroom and let her look in. “Not much here. It has a private bath, but I have put nothing in here but the extra bed. My daughter stays over occasionally, but otherwise it is just unused space.”  
“My place has four bedrooms. I never use the other three at all. One is nothing but storage.”  
“Wow. Four. Big place,” Leo asked?  
“Big enough. 3800 square feet. A lot more than I need.”  
“That is pretty big. Do you like it?” Leo realizes they are making small talk, getting comfortable, getting used to being in the same space together, plus he gets to learn more about her in the bargain. Nan smiles when she too realizes what they have been doing.  
“I do. It’s a federal style brick, three levels with a patio and a small pool. I love the kitchen the most and the family room at the back. It is peaceful and cozy. It is my home.” Leo sees that that is very important to Nan, the idea of home. A cozy peaceful place.  
He walks Nan into the living room. “Oh,” she says when she sees the wall of windows facing east, extending from floor to ceiling. A fireplace connected the living room and dining room to her right and to her left was the kitchen, open to the living room through a wide pass through. Leo has placed four stainless steel and leather high stools with backs against the counter. The far side of the living room had wide doors that opened onto a short Juliette style balcony with a heavy wrought iron railing. The furniture in the room was simple. The sofa was eight feet long and deep, upholstered in a deep teal blue plush fabric. On either end of the sofa, sitting at right angles, were two matching deep club chairs. The huge, six-foot coffee table was made of stainless and heavy glass and was covered with magazines and coasters.  
“Wow. I love this room. It looks lived in. Comfy. The view is just breathtaking,” Nan says as she strokes the plush back of the nearest chair.  
“Thanks. I like it. Like your home, this has become my home. I lived in a hotel for almost two years before I got this place. I wish I had done it sooner,” he admitted. Let me show you what sold me on this place,” he said as he took her hand and led her further into the living room. To the left she could see another doorway to the right down a short hallway and beyond that the laundry room. Leo led her to the doorway on the right.  
“I spend a lot of time here. They call it the sunroom. I call it the thinking, reading, just staring outside, room” The room was small, barely five by nine feet but Leo had placed a love seat, a smaller twin to the sofa in the living room, facing the doors that spanned the width of the wall. A smaller version of the same coffee table from the living room sat in front of the love seat. It too was covered in magazines and coasters, but also a stack of books. Liz recognized his copy of Yeats and the Churchill book.  
“So. This is my home. Welcome,” Leo gave her a courtly bow that made her laugh.  
“Thank you, Leo,” she smiled and curtsied and Leo felt like a weight had been lifted from his soul.  
He led her back to the living room and gave her the chair to the left of the couch. “Can I get you anything to drink,” Leo asked and then remembered something he wanted to tell her. “Nan? Remember when we were talking that first day and you asked if I had a beer when I got home? I was kind of abrupt with my answer. I recall that.” Leo dropped his head to stare at the floor. I assume you know I am a recovering alcoholic?” Leo was afraid to look her in the eye, but when he got no answer from her, he raised his eyes to hers in question. She was smiling.  
“I know that, now that I know who you are. I also know about the valium. It does not change the way I am beginning to feel about you,” she said when she saw the look on his face and was rewarded with a hopeful smile when she said she had feelings for him. I have to confess to a substance abuse problem of my own, Leo. I am clean five years and have a sponsor.”  
Leo looked at her, his eyes wide. “I will tell you all about it. I promise. I hope you will tell me about you?” Leo swallowed hard. This was something he was no good at, in fact rotten at, telling people about himself, talking about the wreck he had been, revealing the low points in his life. But seeing the look in her eyes, he knew he had to try, or he would lose her, that was a given. He nodded.  
“So. A drink? Iced tea, hot tea, tonic with lemon? Soda?”  
“Tonic and lemon,” she answered.  
“My favorite,” he smiled as he went into the kitchen. She heard the refrigerator open and the hiss of a bottle opening. She heard a drawer open and the rattle of silverware. He brought out two tall glasses full of ice with a lemon wedge in each, nestled amongst the bubbles. He handed one to her, then sat on the sofa next to her chair and dug a coaster out of the mess on the table to put his glass on. He dug around and found another coaster that he placed before her on the table. “Sorry about the mess. I keep the place pretty clean and tidy, but I can’t seem to keep this table clear. It’s always a mess.”  
She nodded in understanding as she took a sip of the tonic and lemon. She raised her eyebrow in appreciation. “Nice. And I know what you mean about the table. My messy spot is my dining room table. Living alone, I never use it. I eat in the kitchen usually, so the dining table has become the Bermuda Triangle of papers and stuff.”  
They chatted about nothing and everything as they sipped their drinks, then the conversation stilled. Nan set down her glass and wrung her hands in her lap. Leo stood and took her glass and his to the kitchen. He came back and sat facing her on the sofa. He waited. He gave her time. The minutes became heavy and seemed to slow to a crawl, then Nan took a deep breath and set her shoulders. She looked into Leo’s eyes, his patiently watching her.  
“I have to get this out in one fell swoop, as they say. Please do not interrupt me. Do not ask me any questions until I am done. This will not begin to explain everything, but I need to get this off my chest. Okay?”  
Leo just nodded, afraid to breath, afraid to move, afraid she would run again.  
Nan looked down at her hands again. “When I found out who you were, it really hit me hard. Scared the hell out of me. I know Nancy told you some of this already. I am a very private person, Leo. Perhaps, some would say, almost reclusive. Nancy is my best, and really only friend. I do not go out, socialize, party. I am not shy. I used to be the belle of the ball. I loved to dance and be with people. Something happened to change that. I don’t know if I can tell you about that today. Maybe. But anyway, when I found out who you were, I was terrified. You are a very well known, if not the most well-known figure in Washington, even more than the President. People recognize you on sight. You have been called the second most powerful man in Washington, if not the world. Where you go, the press goes. People follow, want to be near you, in your circle. What I saw in that first moment, when I knew Mack, was Leo McGarry, was what would happen if I was with you. The press, camera flashes, questions, the papers, the magazines. Gossip, Capitol Beat, the digging into my past, and yours again. The privacy I have used to hold my life together would be gone. They would know everything about me. The shame, what happened to me and how the press and the world had to know every detail of my pain and shame and agony. I can’t do that. Not again. I am not strong enough. Not now, maybe never. Not yet. I have been in therapy for five years, after I realized I had a problem and needed help. I was told I was suicidal. Not overtly, I didn’t think to myself ‘I want to die’, but I became very reckless. I drove fast, went on mountain biking trips on trails that were as difficult as you could find, I took up bungee jumping, rock climbing and base jumping. Subconsciously, I was trying to die, hoping that I would lose control, of the bike, the climb the…” she sighed deeply and seemed to shrink in on herself.  
Leo was shaking he was trying so hard not to move, not to take her in his arms, not to whisper into her hair that it was okay, he was here. He kept his promise to her and she continued.  
“And I took pills. Anything. To sleep. To wake up. To feel numb. To feel anything. To get through the days and to get through the nights. I woke up one night in abject terror. My heart was beating so hard I couldn’t breathe. My throat pounded. I was dizzy and disoriented. I didn’t know where I was, in my own home, I was lost. I staggered from the bed, my legs so weak, I fell every few steps. I went into the hall, not seeing where I was going, my sight on something, I don’t know what, and I fell down the stairs. All the way down. I couldn’t move, I was in so much pain. I laid there while I hallucinated, in and out of consciousness. For a day, until Nancy came over and found me. I broke my arm, my collar bone and my ankle. I was dehydrated. I spent almost two weeks in the hospital. When Nancy brought me home, she told me that this was it. She couldn’t take it anymore. She had tried to help. It was now up to me. She couldn’t stay and watch me kill myself. She would never have left me on my own, but I didn’t know that at the time. So, I began therapy. Five years later I still don’t know if I will ever be the Nan I once was. The Nan I liked. I have what is called Uncomplicated PTSD. Caused by a traumatic event and the reliving of that event and then exacerbated by substance abuse, panic attacks and depression. In other words, I am a bit of a mess.”  
“I don’t know how this will end, if it will end, if it will go anywhere. After I started therapy I tried dating. It was dismal, to say the least. Then one guy decided that no was not an acceptable answer to his advances. I broke his jaw and that was the end of my dating life. Leo, I have not been with anyone on a date for five years. It has been seven years since I have had sex. I…don’t know if I will ever trust anyone enough, get over the terror enough to be with someone. That makes me a pretty dismal catch. Ya know…”  
Leo gently reached out and took her hands in his. He held then firmly, but not tightly, and caressed the backs with his thumbs. He watched her face, waiting for her to make eye contact with him. Finally, she raised her head and looked into his eyes. He smiled, the full blown Leo smile, and she had to smile back. How could you not respond in kind when he smiled like that and his face lit up.  
“Nan, my god. I…uh, I understand. God, do I understand. I was diagnosed with PTSD years ago. My addiction was, as you know, alcohol. I followed that up with Valium, but it was and is alcohol that was my obsession. I am an alcoholic and always will be. My trauma, the PTSD, is related to my service in Vietnam. What almost no one knows is that I was shot down twice. The second time got me sent home. The first was eight months before and I was captured and held for almost three months before I managed to escape. Then recent events have not helped.”  
“I know about the Rosslyn shooting…”  
“And the Presidents daughter’s kidnapping, some information that I never knew that was brought to me. It’s a lot of things. The worst part is the one no one knows about. It happened in Nam, and there are records, but I have told no one. Not my family, not the President, no one. I have nightmares. I wake up screaming. I am back there again, I can’t…get, I can’t escape. People died because of me, I am…” Leo gasped as he pulled his hands from hers and sat back on the sofa. He dragged his hand over his face and shuddered.  
“Nan, I am so sorry. That is not about me. This is about you. Nan, what happened? Can you tell me?”  
“NO, Leo. This is about us. Can you tell me? Can you share with me what happened to you? Can you bare your soul to me, your naked soul? That is what you are asking of me. I don’t know. Do you,” Nan whispered?  
Leo sat forward and took Nan’s hands in his again. He gazed into her eyes, her sad lovely green eyes. “I don’t know if I can. I do know I want to try. I want to get to know you, I want to be with you. I am beginning to…I feel, uh, Nan…damn it. I’m sorry. I care about you; I have feelings for you. I want to kiss you and hold you. I want to tell you my deepest darkest secrets and I want you to trust me with yours. That’s what I know. Can you, do you, want to try?”  
Nan squeezed his hands and breathed a soft shuddering breath. She ducked her head and stared at their hands linked together. She marveled at the strength in his hands, his long slender fingers, the perfectly trimmed nails. He had warm, sexy, poetic hands. She looked back up to his face.  
“For the first time, in a very long time, I want to try. I do. I am terrified Leo. This won’t be easy. There are still things you need to know, things that may still scare you away.”  
“I don’t scare easily Nan. I know it won’t be easy. I still have more to tell you about me too. But if we don’t do this, if we do not take this chance, I don’t think I will ever find peace, find someone to love before I am too old. Please. Let’s give this a chance.”  
“I want to try. Yes.” Nan smiled and reached out to touch Leo’s check. He cupped his hand around hers and then kissed her palm. “Come sit with me.” He scooted over and made room, so she could stand and shift over to the sofa. When he started to lift his right arm around her shoulders she shied away and drew in a breath. He lowered his arm and grabbed her left hand and settled their hands on his thigh. She leaned into his arm and laid her cheek on his shoulder. Leo laid his head lightly on hers. They sat without speaking, holding hands and breathing for almost an hour. They both jumped when Lewis knocked once on the door and entered.  
“Mr. McGarry?”  
“Living room, Lewis.”  
“Sir. Sweep and shift change.”  
“Wow. It’s 7:00?”  
“Ten ‘til sir.”  
“Okay.”  
Lewis walked through the apartment from room to room and came back into the living room. “All clear sir. Anything you need?”  
Leo looked at Nan, then back to Lewis. “Could you get Eddie? To give Ms. Gray a ride home?”  
“Leo, I can walk…”  
“Not at this time of night. I know, you have probably done it before. But please, allow me. Ease my mind. Let my driver take you home.”  
“Sir. I am off now. I can drive Ms. Gray home. It is actually on my way and I know her address.”  
Leo looked at Nan and smiled. “Please?”  
She blushed and nodded. “Okay.”  
Lewis, can you give us ten minutes?”  
“No problem. Have to finish filling in the night crew. I will be outside in the hall.”  
“Thanks.” Leo turned to Nan and very slowly touched her cheek. “Thank you. Are you okay? I didn’t even feed you. Where are my manners?”  
Nan smiled. “I am really not hungry. And I am okay.” She paused and gazed into his eyes. “You know? I really am okay. Honestly, I am.”  
“Good.” Leo stood and held out his hand and helped her up from the sofa. They walked to the door hand in hand. Leo handed Nan her bag from the foyer table and took her hands in his again. At the door, Leo reached to open it, and stopped. He faced Nan and dipped his head, then looked over her shoulder and finally back to her face. Decision made, he leaned in slowly and brushed his lips over hers so lightly, she wondered if he had touched her at all. All she felt was his breath. Then he opened the door and nodded to Lewis.  
“When? When can we be together again?”  
“Next weekend? I will call you tomorrow, I want you to meet with Nancy again. I will tell you why and when. Is that okay?”  
Leo squeezed he hand. “Whatever you want. Lewis will give you my cell phone number. And thank you, Nan. Sleep well, tonight.”  
She blushed and smiled. “You too, Leo.” And then she was gone. Leo stood in the open doorway long after the elevator doors had opened and then closed. He stared at the doors until Goodson cleared his throat and Leo started.  
“Geez. Sorry Goodson. Thanks. Goodnight.” Leo closed the door and went back into the living room. He opened the doors to the balcony on the north wall and looked out over the city until the sky had darkened and the air had cooled. Closing the doors, he turned off all the lights and went to his bedroom and sat in the chair by the window, staring into the night until he fell into a restless sleep.

Monday and Tuesday were a blur and he had slept a total of five hours and now on Wednesday morning at 5:15 he was back in the situation room again. Columbia was rearing its ugly head again. They had just dealt with a hostage crisis there, Qumar and Shareef, the MS things was winding down, but they were taking all of Leo’s time along with at least another dozen urgent matters. Leo hadn’t been in bed three hours when the call came in that he had to return to the Situation Room.  
A few months ago, a drug shipment bound for Indonesia was intercepted by a combined Ranger/Seal operation off of the coast of Columbia. Chatter now indicated the FARC was going to try it again. They were desperate for money and needed the sale of a shipment to fund arms purchases.  
“God damn it, how many times are we going to have to do this? They didn’t get the hint the first time?”  
President Bartlet sat to Leo’s right as always. “Miles, are we able to put together another response again? Can we intercept another shipment?”  
“Yes. I think we can. We don’t have as much information as last time. They are really keeping this quiet. The chatter is sparse, but, we have a guy in Maracaibo who is on it and thinks they are going to try to get out of Punto Fijo, head north to Haiti and the word is, fly the shipment to Mexico. From there can go anywhere. We have to intercept them between Punto Fijo and Haiti”  
“I want to see a plan and I want to see numbers on probable losses and casualties, in an hour. Fitz? Can we do this on this short a timeline?”  
“It will be close. We will get you that assessment and we will have to go sometime today.”  
“Leo, anything else?”  
“Nothing now, Mr. President.” The President stood and left the room with Leo following.  
“Leo, what’s on your plate the rest of the day?”  
“Meetings on the hill that I will probably cancel. Subpoenas are coming in right and left for the hearings. I expect mine any day. I also have to meet with Nancy McNally later.”  
“About the FARC problem?”  
“Yeah, probably.”

“Nancy McNally is here Leo,” Margaret said from the doorway.  
Leo nodded at Margaret and called out, “Hi Nancy. C’mon in. Margaret, shut the door.”  
Nancy came and Leo motioned her over to the couch. He sat in his chair by the window. For the first time in days he allowed himself to think of Nan. Nan had called and left him a message on Monday that Nancy would like to see him on Wednesday. He agreed and promptly forgot about it until he had seen her in the Sit Room a few hours ago.  
“So Nan told me you both had quite a talk on Sunday. That it went pretty well.”  
Leo sat back in his chair and sighed. “Yeah. We talked for hours, literally, I think it was 7 hours we were together. We didn’t talk through all of it, of course. Yeah know, we sat…”  
“Leo. I don’t need to know all the details,” she smiled.  
“Yeah. Yeah.”  
“So Nan asked me to talk to you about what happened to her seven years ago. Leo, she wanted to, but she has a really difficult time talking about it, even to her therapist. I know everything because I was actually here at the time and we were friends then. So you know what her job entails, right?”  
“Well pretty much. She is a translator so obviously she must speak several languages, right?”  
Nancy laughed. “Forty-nine. Second only to Ziad Fazah who claims fifty-eight. She is a linguist, Leo. She not only can speak the languages, she can tear them apart, deconstruct them and decipher and pull meaning from the most complex phrase. She is also an expert in Semiotics and cultural Islam. She is indispensable to the State Department.”  
“Why have I never heard of her?”  
“Most of her work is translating documents and books and messages. She oversees the whole translation department. You have most certainly read her translations and her briefs, but never knew who it was that wrote those briefs.”  
“So this thing that happened to her, was it work related. I am getting the feeling it was.”  
“It was. Last administration, seven years ago. She was sent on a mission to Iran. Shortly after the U.S. imposed oil and trade sanctions over Iran's alleged sponsorship of terrorism a series of documents related to this Iranian terrorism surfaced. They required authentication. They were to meet a group in Tabriz that had possession of the documents. From Tabriz they would make for Turkey, but they never got to Tabriz. Halfway between Tehran and Tabriz their convoy was attacked. Everyone but Nan and three soldiers were killed. IED’s took out the first two vehicles. Nan was in the last. She was taken prisoner along with the three soldiers.”  
“My god. I remember this. You mean…”  
“If you remember the details you remember what happened to the female US government official captured in Iran as a spy and a terrorist.”  
“No. Nancy? That was Nan? I remember them saying she was…god no.”  
“Held and mercilessly raped, beaten for 21 days. Mostly just raped, used by these so called religious fanatics as a toy. The three soldiers were tortured to death. When the Seal team sent in on the recovery got to her she was practically comatose with injuries besides those that related to the rape.”  
Leo dropped his head into his hands. It was impossible for him to even imagine what had happened to Nan, and yet she appeared to have survived it, at least on the outside. She was beautiful and healthy and fit. Inside was probably another matter.  
“They air-lifted her to Ramstein and almost immediately flew her to Bethesda. She was dehydrated, in severe shock, had lost a lot blood, had a broken collar bone on the left and a broken right arm. Her jaw was broken, she had lost four teeth and her patella was dislocated on the left leg. The worst damage though, Leo, would require three different surgeries to repair. They basically had to repair and rebuild her vagina, and …and her rectum.”  
Leo looked up at Nancy in shock and groaned. “Oh my…how is she even…how has she gone on…I am in awe.”  
“The surgeries were tough, physically, on her. Dealing with the aftermath, she is still struggling Leo. She is in therapy dealing with the flashbacks, the fear, the shame…”  
“Shame? Why?”  
“Leo, most people, most men, think when a woman is raped that she asked for it. She was a tease, she was a flirt, she used her body to… whatever. Do not look at me like that. It is true and you know it is. Women deal with so much guilt and shame when this happens. Regardless of the fact that she was captured in a foreign country and held by terrorists, there was still that kind of talk going on. You cannot even imagine how that destroys a woman. How it came close to destroying Nan. She almost lost the battle Leo, almost lost her sanity. How she has made it to this point and still has managed to be the kind, caring, smart successful woman she is astounds me.”  
“Nancy, my god, how can I even hope to be worthy of her, how…”  
“You can’t. Not in my mind, Leo. I do not think there is a man out there worthy of her, who can walk side by side with her, be what she needs him to be. She wants to let you into her life. She wants to try to find some peace, some normalcy, some hope for the future. Why you, I have no idea. But she sees something in you Leo.”  
“I want to be what she needs, I want to be with her, I want to walk with her…”  
“Leo. Do you have any idea what is ahead of you both? You know, she told me you kissed her. The last guy that tried that got a broken jaw. She has not been with anyone since the incident. The doctors have told her that she can have sex, she should be able to have a normal, physical relationship with a man. She is terrified. She can’t stand to be held, especially tightly. It all comes back, when she was restrained and held down by those men that, in her mind, defiled her. She is terrified that intercourse will be painful, no matter what the doctors have said. She is afraid she can never be held without reliving the terror again and again.”  
Nancy sat back on the couch and sighed. “Are you that guy Leo? We all know, Leo, that you have had problems. You have your own demons to fight. Do you want to take on hers too?”  
Leo looked Nancy in the eye and smiled. “Yeah. I want to be that guy.” ‘God help me; I want to be that guy.’ 

After Nancy left Leo sat in his chair and thought about all she had told him. He couldn’t stop the tears that fell down his cheeks, tears for Nan, and yeah, if he admitted it, for himself too. Could he be strong enough to battle her demons and his own as well? Could he be the one to help her find herself again? Could he find himself again too? Could they, together, find something they had both lost and in doing so, become a healthy whole? Could he finally, for once and for all, put his past behind him? Could he help her put her past, where it belonged, in the past? Suddenly he had to see her. He knew he couldn’t wait another second before he had to lay eyes on her, hear her voice, just watch her breathe. He jumped up and grabbed his coat.  
“Margaret, I have to go to State. I’ll be at the Truman building.” Leo walked past her desk as he pulled on his coat.  
“WHAT? How long? Leo, you have an appointment,” Margaret yelled as she followed him down the hall.  
“Cancel it,” Leo yelled back at her over his shoulder.

He got to the Truman building in record time, walking the three-quarters of a mile in ten minutes, with Lewis trailing behind him talking nonstop into his wrist mic. He was angry that Leo swept out of the building and headed down the street without even telling him where they were going. He left by way of the West Colonnade and walked out onto the South Lawn Road, headed right and left the grounds by way of the EEOB entrance that let him out onto 17th St. He crossed onto New York Ave and walked down the left hand side of the street. He crossed 18th street then 19th street and hung right to E St. NW. At 21st street he went left and walked to the 21st street entrance to the Truman building. A security guard stopped him, but he waved his White House ID, and behind him Lewis flashed his Secret Service ID.  
In the lobby of the building Leo asked the Security guard at the desk where Nan Gray’s office was. He was told to wait while the guard got on the phone and moments later another guard arrived and told Leo to follow him. Leo looked at Lewis who shrugged and followed. They went up in an elevator several floors and wound up a handful of turns later at a desk in front of glass double doors. Inside Leo could see rows of desks occupied by people on computer, many of them with headphones on.  
“I am sorry sir, but I do not believe you have an appointment, Mr.…” asked the middle-aged secretary at the front desk?  
“McGarry. Leo McGarry,” Leo informed her impatiently.  
As the secretary was raising an eyebrow Leo felt a hand on his arm. He looked up and saw Nancy McNally’s scowling face. He swallowed and nodded at her. She took his arm and walked him several feet away from the desk so they could not be overheard.  
“What are you doing Leo?”  
“I don’t know. I just needed to see her. Just for a minute. Just, uh, Nancy…I just wanted to…I needed to see her.”  
Nancy smiled and shook her head. “You got it bad, McGarry.”  
“Yeah. The worst,” he admitted with a wan smile.  
“Okay,” she said as she motioned him to follow her. “Ms. Banks, I will take Mr. McGarry to see Ms. Gray. They have an informal meeting pertaining to a document translation.” The secretary nodded, her look letting everyone know she was none too pleased with the break in protocol. Lewis followed as they crossed the large room full of desks and went to a door in the corner.  
“Lewis, you can wait here by the door,” Nancy said and then knocked on the door. Leo heard Nan call out, “Come in.” Nancy smiled and walked away as she told him, “Go on in. Be good.”

Leo turned the knob on the door and walked into the office and closed the door behind him. Nan was seated at a desk angled 45 degrees into the far corner in front of a window. She was writing on a document with her right hand as she held up her left hand. She then finished writing and put down the pen and looked up.  
Nan gasped in surprise and sat back in her chair, hand at the throat. Leo walked slowly over to stand in front of her desk, his hands buried deep in his pant pockets. When he reached the desk he looked down, took a deep breath and then looked into her eyes. They didn’t move, barely breathed and waited. Leo spoke first.  
“Hi.”  
Nan giggled. “Eloquent, Mack.”  
Leo smirked, his impish little boy smirk. “Yeah. Well, ya know.”  
“No. I don’t know. Leo, what are you doing here?”  
“Nancy told me.”  
Nan looked down, suddenly finding her hands fascinating. She couldn’t look at him. She drew in a ragged breath. “Everything?”  
“Yeah, I think it was everything that you wanted her to tell me. Gotta tell you, it was a lot.”  
Nan didn’t say anything, and Leo waited, wishing he could sit down because his knees were feeling a little wobbly, especially after his sprint from the White House. Leo willed her to look at him, to say something, to ask him anything. ‘Just look at me.’  
She lifted her eyes to his and he smiled his full on Leo smile, not the Chief of Staff smile, or the campaign smile, or the gee, glad to meet ya smile, but the Leo smile that came from his heart. She couldn’t help but smile back, but she still didn’t understand why he was here.  
“So. Now you know. Why are you here, Leo?”  
“Because I had to see you. I had to make sure you were real and not some amazing figment of my imagination. I had to see your face and hear you breathe. I had to tell you…I had to…I am your guy, Nan. I wanna be that guy. I wanna be with you. I don’t know how; I didn’t know I could fall so fast…I love you. I want to love you and …shit.” Leo stumbled to the chair beside her desk and sat down hard. “Nothing Nancy told me makes me love you any less. In fact, I admire you, your strength, your smile, that you carry on...”  
Nan held her trembling hand over her mouth as tears fell down her cheeks.  
“God, I am sorry, Nan,” Leo moved to her side and squatted beside her chair and took her free hand in his. “Please don’t cry. I don’t want to hurt you. I might at some point, it’s what I do, but I will never do it on purpose or with malice. I can be a jerk sometimes.”  
She reached out and stroked his cheek with her damp hand, leaving her tears on his cheek. “Leo. It’s okay. These are not sad tears. Thank you. I don’t know what to say. I want you to be that guy, I really do.”  
Leo stood up, reached out and took her hands and pulled her to her feet. He stepped as close to her as he could without his body touching hers, only holding her hands. He leaned forward slowly and gently kissed her cheek. Nan leaned into the kiss then pulled back. She looked into his eyes then she leaned in and kissed Leo’s mouth. He held his breath and didn’t move a muscle as she leaned in and deepened the kiss. Leo leaned back when he couldn’t hold his breath anymore and gasped.  
“Wow. I was starting to get dizzy,” he laughed.  
“You’re supposed to breathe, Leo.”  
“You take my breath away. You rob me of oxygen and all sense, Nan Gray.” He leaned in again and kissed her firmly and pulled back. He raised her hands and kissed the back of each hand.  
“I have to go. I am AWOL. I just walked out of the White House without telling anyone where I was going. Well, I might have told Margaret. I don’t remember,” he laughed. I feel giddy. I usually don’t do giddy.”  
“You also ramble on when you are nervous.”  
“Yeah. Got it. Okay. This will last me until Sunday.” He leaned in and kissed her once again.  
“Sunday. That seems like a long way off,” Nan said.  
“I may be able to get a half day on Saturday. I will let you know.” Leo didn’t want to let go of her hands. He wanted to stand here for the rest of the day, kissing her. But he had to go. He made his way to the door without breaking eye contact with her until he left and closed the door.  
Lewis walked over talking into his mic. “Yes sir. Well, Mr. McGarry, what a fine pickle…”  
“Shit. We in trouble?”  
“Not me sir. You though have an irate President wondering where in the hell you are in the middle of a work day. Apparently you are supposed to be in the Sit Room right now.”  
“Oh shit. We better make tracks Lewis,” Leo said as they headed for the elevator.  
“Sir, I don’t know why you keep saying ‘we’.”  
“I am not going down alone Lewis. Buckle up, gonna be a rough ride.”  
Lewis sighed and spoke again into the mic. “Irish on the way back to the nest.”

 

Leo took his time getting back to the White House, his limp was pronounced and his hip was screaming in pain. He rubbed it as he walked but that didn’t help. ‘Note to self, old man. Speed walking down the street; not a good idea.’ He went straight to the Situation Room without taking off his coat and sat next to the President.  
The President raised an eyebrow as Leo dug a white handkerchief out of his pocket and mopped his face and tried to slow down his breathing. Leo looked at him. “What?”  
President Bartlet just shook his head in a ‘not now’ motion and indicated to Admiral Fitzwallace he should continue. Fitz had a map put up on the large screen at the back of the room. “We have confirmation. It’s a positive confirm. The shipment is being readied in a small town that is FARC held outside of Medellin. They will have a small convoy of 2-3 trucks taking back roads to Maracaibo, crossing into Venezuela at Tres Bocas where they can catch the route or road just numbered six. That road goes right into Maracaibo where there are hundreds of places where they can board a boat.”  
“How can they cross into Venezuela undetected?”  
“They will most likely abandon monitored roads and cross at night, then get back on the main road after they have covered their tracks. The Venezuelan government is working on this with us and are providing troops to monitor possible crossings. They will not interact with the convoy, only keep it under surveillance.”  
“I am sorry Fitz, but isn’t that kinda like putting the kids in charge of the candy store. Venezuela has its own drug problem and might love to get their hands on a large shipment of drugs,” Leo said as he shrugged out of his coat.  
“Not too many other options,” Hutchinson said. They will not allow our DEA agents into the country, our Ranger team will be allowed only conditional access in Maracaibo and then only to make an arrest in the city proper. If they make it out to sea, our Navy Seal team cannot act until they are out of Venezuelan waters.”  
“That’s cutting it awfully close. Fitz? Why are they being so restrictive on this?”  
“We think they really might make a move on the shipment themselves.”  
Leo turned to the President. “Sir? What about the ambassador. Have you spoken?”  
“We have, which you would know if you had been there…”  
Leo shook his head, looked down at his hands and grumbled under his breath.  
“What’s that, Leo?”  
“Nothing. We need to talk to him again. We have to make sure that the government stays out of this. They should be worried that the FARC are crossing into their country.” Leo looked to Miles. We need him on the phone again. Now. Let’s do it here.”  
“Okay. Set it up.”  
Leo stood up. “I need to run to my office. I’ll be right…”  
The President grabbed his arm and pulled him back down into his seat. “Oh no. I am not letting you out of my sight until this thing is over.”  
“Sir. This could take days to resolve. DO you really…”  
“If I have to have the Secret Service chain you to the foot of my bed, Leo…”  
Leo sat back in his chair with a harrumph. “Yes, sir.”  
In the end the whole situation crumbled like a house of cards seven hours later when the Columbian government stepped up and raided the FARC camp and seized the shipment. Lord knows where the drugs will end up, Leo had mussed, but it was out of their hands now. All he wanted to do was go home and take his hip to bed.


	5. Chapter V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So Nan, how do you know Leo?”  
> Nan looked down at her trembling hands. She hated to do this without Leo, but they were asking questions now and she didn’t think blowing them off would work. The cat was literally out of the bag and running amok.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MATURE/ADULT - this chapter has explicit sexual situations.

CHAPTER V

 

Leo waited for Nan to call. She should have called hours ago and he was starting to get a little nervous and maybe a tiny bit pissed. They had so little time as it was that any delays, his or hers, took away from them. This late on a Friday she should have been home, here, with him. He tried her cell again and it went straight to voicemail. ‘Damn’. He wasn’t pissed at her but at circumstances beyond their control.  
It had been four months since Nancy McNally had told him about Nan’s, incident, he still didn’t know what to call it. Four months in which they had spent every minute together they could find. Sundays were a given and some Saturdays in the evening after Leo could escape the West Wing. Weekdays, or nights, were hit and miss. When they could manage a weeknight it was usually already the next day and they gave up sleep to talk softly in the night. All in all, they had spent little more than an actual month together in the last four months. The time they spent was quality time though, hours spent talking and talking and talking. Learning about each other, likes and dislikes, fears and hopes. Talking about the past and future, about the nightmares and the pain and in the process they were both not only getting to know each other, but were slowly, so very slowly, healing.  
Leo wanted to talk to Nan about splitting their time between their two homes. Weeknights at his apartment since it was so close to work and weekends at her larger home with a kitchen they could cook in and a pool. He had already asked Ron Butterfield to begin vetting her neighborhood and decide what security upgrades were necessary. He would pay for the upgrades himself if he had to.  
They needed more time together, more hours talking, learning about each other, just being together and getting comfortable with each other. The first month they had both been tentative, nervous, not wanting to step on toes, but it was getting easier. For the last three months, on the weekends and the occasional weekday, Nan had stayed at Leo’s, sleeping in his spare bedroom. Before he asked her if she would like to stay he had gone shopping.  
He chuckled when he remembered Lewis’ face when he told him he wanted to go to shopping for housewares so he could fix up the room with a rug in the bathroom, sheets and a comforter and a pile of pillows for the bed, a new lamp for the nightstand and curtains.  
When Nan was there they would cook dinner then after they would cuddle on the sofa, talking, touching, kissing while the TV droned in the background. Leo was patient and gentle and restrained, knowing that he could ruin everything if he pushed her too hard too fast. She still had nightmares and one episode was a full blown flashback. He was woken by her screams and when he ran to her bedroom he found her in the corner cowering and clawing at the wall. He tried to hold her and she fought him, hitting and kicking. All he could do was sit and touch her leg while she slowly came back to herself. She saw him finally, and sobbed for what seemed like hours and finally she crawled into his lap on the floor and allowed him to wrap one arm about her shoulders. The next night Leo had his first nightmare in months, kicking in his bed, shouting, until Nan had come to him and sat up against the headboard with his head and shoulders in her lap stroking his face until he slept, and then she had crept back to her room.  
In the last few weeks, they had become more physical, more adventurous, lying on the sofa side by side, touching and stroking and kissing. Last Sunday after a dinner of stir fry they cleaned up and went to the sofa. Leo turned on the TV to CNN and muted it. He sat on the couch against the arm, his left leg straight out against the back and his right foot on the floor. Nan curled into his chest between his legs and lay her head on his shoulder. He rested his cheek on her forehead and stroked her arm as they watched the soundless news updates.  
Nan tipped back her head and looked at Leo. He leaned down and touched his lips to hers then drew back and looked at her. His breath caught in his throat when he saw the smoldering look in her eyes. He had seen many things in her eyes, but never a look of such naked desire. He leaned down and took her mouth with his, parting her lips and gently, tentatively probing her mouth with his tongue. He stroked the roof of her mouth, wrapped his tongue around hers, opened up his mouth to her and their tongues tangled. Leo held her mouth hostage with his, tongues probing and thrusting until they both pulled away gasping for breath. Leo took a deep breath and dove back to her mouth, kissed her, sucking on her lower lip, then kissed again and sucked her tongue into his mouth.  
They were both gasping and trembling as Nan backed away and laid her forehead on his chin. Leo raised her chin with a finger and kissed her nose. “That was amazing. We can stop, we can wait. If you are not ready for anything more right now we can stop.”  
Nan didn’t speak. She shifted on the couch so she was facing him and reached out to touch his face, then dropped her hands and unbuttoned the first few buttons of his shirt. She dipped her head to his throat and kissed him, alternately kissing and licking, then finding the spot just under his ear that drove him crazy, she bit and sucked the flesh. Leo moaned and reached out to hold her without thinking. Nan backed away quickly.  
“Oh. God Nan. I am so sorry. Damn, I didn’t mean to…”  
She stopped him with a finger on his lips. “Sshhh. It’s okay. I am okay.”  
“We don’t have to…”  
“Leo. I want to. But let me…please…let me touch you”  
He nodded, dropping his arms to the sofa and leaned back. He surrendered to her, letting her run the show. Whatever she wanted he would allow, would give, would relish. Nan stood and had him bring his other leg up on the couch and she straddled his thighs. Leaning forward she pulled his shirt from his jeans and finished unbuttoning it. He leaned forward to help her as she removed his shirt and dropped it to the floor. She ran her fingers through his chest hair, splayed her fingers as she ran them over his chest, stopping to tease his nipples, pinching and rubbing. She leaned forward and lightly licked his left nipple, then took it into her mouth and sucked hard. Leo thrust his hips forward and moaned, “My god, Nan. Harder, suck harder.”  
She took the other nipple and licked and sucked until Leo groaned deep in his chest. He wanted to touch her, crush her to his chest, take her mouth. He clenched his fists in his effort to not reach out for her. Nan moved her attentions from his nipples to his stomach, licking nibbling down until she ran into his belt buckle. Leo lifted his head from the sofa arm and looked down at her as she teased the flesh there and nipped at the hairs than ran down under the waistband of his jeans.  
She raised herself up and leaned forward, taking his mouth again. She grabbed his face with both hands and made love to his mouth, probing, biting, licking until Leo thought he could just die right then and there.  
Nan kissed his eyes, his nose, his ears, running her hands through his fine sandy hair. “God, Nan, that feels…ahhhh…so good. Can I..please…Nan…”  
“Shut up McGarry. Just be quiet…no, just moan. I like that, I like to make you moan…”  
“Oh, God, Nan…aahhh.”  
She moved back down his body, neck, shoulders, chest, nipples, navel; licking and kissing and biting as she moved down to the belt buckle again. “Oh Leo,” she moaned when she palmed the bulge straining the front of his jeans. Leo gasped in response, Nan rubbing and scratching the fabric that restrained his penis. She leaned down and nibbled him through the fabric as Leo whispered her name.  
She unbuckled his belt with trembling fingers and pulled it from the belt loops dropping it on the floor. She fumbled with the top button on his jeans and then frowned when she ran into another button. “Oh jeez, McGarry. 501’s? Jeans with a zipper would be helpful here,” she whined as she struggled with the next button.  
Leo couldn’t help but laugh. “Nan? Can I,” Leo asked as he brought his hands up to the front of his jeans. Nan nodded as Leo unbuttoned the jeans quickly and dropped his hands back to the sofa by his sides. She pulled his jeans open and reached her hand in to caress him through the sexy black silk boxers he wore. “Ohhh, Nan, my god. Yeah…,” Leo squirmed as Nan worked open the small button on the fly of the boxers, then reached in and pulled his hardening erection into her hand.  
“Wow, Leo,” Nan whispered as she looked up into his eyes. She stroked her fingers up the bottom of his shaft, using her nails to scratch the vein from base to head, and then twirled her fingers around the straining head. Leo’s hips thrust gently into her hand, his butt muscles clenching. Nan grabbed him firmly with her hand and worked him up and down, rubbing her thumb hard over the tip of his cock on the upstroke. She stroked him slowly, leaning in to take his mouth again, thrusting her tongue in, battling with his tongue, her left hand rubbing, then pinching his right nipple until it was a hardened nub. Leo could barely breath and didn’t care, pushing into the kiss until their tongues caressed the smooth palate at the back of their mouths.  
Leo fell back on the arm of the sofa, gasping for breath as Nan dropped her mouth to his neck, nibbling his Adams apple, then up to his earlobes and the flesh beneath and then the dip in the top of his sternum, nipping, biting, licking and all the time pumping his cock, working it so slowly Leo thought he would expire. God he wanted to touch her, knead her breasts, rub his finger over the nipples hard, grip them and twist, he wanted to run his hands down her sides, under the waistband of her sweat pants, he wanted to clutch at the globes of her perfect ass and pull her to him.  
“God, Nan, please…”  
“Please…what do you want me to do, Leo,” she asked as she shifted her body and moved down on his thighs so she could bend forward and oh so slowly, softly, gently, lick the tip of his penis. Leo’s hips bucked almost toppling Nan from the sofa. Almost unseated, she changed tactics and moved down to his knees and then reached up and tugged his jeans down to mid-thigh. “Oh Leo, I love these boxers,” she said as she licked her lips and stroked his balls through the silk fabric, one then the other, then softly caressing them. Leo was squirming and thrusting his cheeks off of the sofa as he fought to keep his hands at his sides.  
“Nan, please…do something…”  
“I have been Leo. What more could you want?”  
“Suck my cock, Nan. Take me in your mouth, suck me, bite me, swallow me…ahhhhh.”  
Nan stopped and stood. “Gahhhh, where are you going?”  
“Nowhere Leo. Lift your butt,” Nan said as she grabbed his jeans and pulled them off of his legs. She knelt by the side of the sofa and leaned forward and nibbled and bit the flesh of his hips and groin through the silk boxers. Then she pulled the boxers down over his feet and tossed them on the pile of Leo’s clothing. She sat back on her heels and raked her eyes over his naked body. She lightly ran her hands over his thighs, his hips and stomach, teasing the hairs. “Leo, you are magnificent,” she breathed as she used her tongue to rim the rigid head of his cock and lick the pre-cum from the tip. Leo groaned an asthmatic, wheezing deep sigh from his core when Nan suddenly leaned forward and took half of his cock down her throat and then sucked hard as she pulled back up to the tip.  
“JESUS fucking…Nan,” Leo yelled as his hips came up off of the sofa. Nan lowered her mouth again, taking in even more of him and again sucked hard, her tongue bathing the shaft of his cock as she pulled back up to the tip. “Oh god, oh god…” Leo breathed over and over as she took more of his cock with each pass, sucking harder and harder as she pulled on him. Then she stopped and climbed onto the sofa, yanking his legs apart. She settled on her arms between his legs and reached under him to grab his ass cheeks in both hands. She took him in her mouth again, now in a position to massage the vein of his cock with her tongue with each stroke and then bathe her tongue up and under the head while all the time squeezing and massaging Leo’s ass.  
Nan picked up the pace, going deeper each time until Leo’s pubic hairs tickled her nose. She sucked and pulled and massaged, pulling longer and harder. Leo tore his eyes open and looked down and almost came when he saw Nan’s mouth on him, taking him all the way. He thrust up into her mouth with each stroke, trying to hold on for as long as he could until Nan shifted her arm under him, spread his cheeks and slid her finger into him and jammed it into his prostate. Leo screamed her name as he came, hot semen bursting from him, ripping him inside out. He came in pulsing waves, bucking, humping her throat as she took him in all the way and sucked until he had nothing left to give. Nan gently licked his softening penis, and kissed the tip before climbing up to lay on his chest. She listened to his heart as it slowed from its maddening pace to a steady strong beat. She absently rubbed his shoulder as he slowly came back to himself and groaned.  
“I think I am blind…and paralyzed…yeah…I can’t even move…” Nan laughed softly and tilted her head to place a soft kiss on his chin. They lay there not moving, just breathing. “My god, Nan, that was…thank you…” Leo lifted his head and kissed her forehead. “I want to touch you, Nan. I want to give you what you just gave me. I want…”  
“Soon Leo. Not yet. You have been so patient, so understanding. I wanted to…give you some release…I wanted to make love to you…  
“That was the most unselfish thing I have ever been a part of, my dear. God, your mouth is…I have no words.”  
“I love being with you Leo. I cherish our time. But now, it is time for bed and no,” she kissed his chin and sighed, not together. Not tonight. I need to do this part slowly, Leo, and right now, if I went to bed with you, I don’t think I could take this slowly. I want you so much I ache, but if we rush this, I…I don’t know...I don’t have control yet, not enough control, to subdue the demons, Leo.”  
“Nan, please let me hold you, one arm, just one arm, please.” Nan sighed and nodded her head. Leo sighed and brought his left arm up from between them on the sofa. He gently reached around her back and rested his hand on her hip and gently stroked her. Nan sighed into his chest and Leo felt wetness on his skin.  
“Please, don’t cry. I will never, EVER, ever hurt you. I will not let anyone hurt you again.”  
“You can’t promise that Leo, that you can keep me safe from pain, from hurt. But I believe you will never hurt me. I do. Just give me more time. Just time.”

 

Then things changed again last night. It was a dark, stormy evening, rain whipping against the wall of windows in the living room, thunder rattling them. Flashes of lightning lit the room like strobes. Nan was edgy and didn’t eat much and couldn’t seem to get comfortable. Finally, at 10:30 she yawned and said she was just tired and was going to go to bed. They had an early morning planned and she wanted to be rested. Leo walked her to the bedroom door, kissed her gently and wished her a good night.  
He paced the living room for an hour wondering what was wrong, what had he done, before giving up and going to bed. He curled up on his side and opened up his current book on Winston Churchill and fell asleep reading while the storm raged outside.  
He was abruptly awakened by a violent series of thunderclaps that sounded like they were on top of his apartment. Moments later he felt a cold draft as his bedcovers were lifted, the mattress dipped and a warm body was suddenly plastered against his back. Arms snaked around his waist and Nan breathed a warm ‘hi’ into his neck.  
“Hey,” Leo said as he groggily tried to turn around to face her.  
“No. Don’t turn around. Sorry, but please just let me, just, I want to stay. I am...”  
“Afraid of the storm,” he teased?  
“No. Maybe. Shut up. Can I stay?”  
Leo grinned in the dark and wrapped his arms over hers as she hugged him from behind, “Of course you can stay. Pull the covers up, yeah, there you go. Just don’t drool on my back, okay.”  
In response she licked his shoulder blade then snuggled close and rested her head on his pillow. Leo lay awake, afraid to move, until he heard her breathing deepen as she fell deeply into sleep. Only then did Leo allow himself to sleep. 

Leo woke slowly in the wee hours of the morning aware of a weight on his chest and hip. He opened his eyes slowly and smiled we he saw Nan snuggled up against him, her left leg thrown over his, her head rested on his chest and her breath teased his nipple. Her left arm lay across his stomach. In her sleep she tensed and groaned softly. Leo gently raised his left hand to rest on her back between her shoulder blades and moved his hand in soft slow circles. She quieted and snuggled deeper into his body. Leo closed his eyes and willed himself back to sleep.

When Leo woke for the day he opened his eyes and looked into a pair of smiling green eyes inches from his own. The laugh lines in the corners of Nans eyes, that he had grown to love, were crinkled up as she smiled at him. She was curled on her side and had propped her head on her right arm. “Jeez McGarry, gonna sleep all day?”  
Leo stretched and moaned and curled on to his side facing her. He reached out and cupped her cheek with his palm. “You okay,” he asked and she nodded and shrugged. What was up with last night? Not that I am complaining that I have this gorgeous creature in my bed this morning, but you were pretty scared last night.”  
Nan unconsciously backed away from Leo slightly, putting just enough distance between them that she no longer leaned into his side. “The storm, I was having a dream, a nightmare…a bad one again and then …I woke up and didn’t know where I was at first. I didn’t, I uh…alone, I…”  
Leo pulled her back against him and kissed her, lips soft on hers, insistent, parting her lips as he deepened the kiss. She pulled back and sighed. “It’s okay. I don’t mind. I’m glad you came to me.”  
Nan sighed and leaned into him again and laid her head on his chest. “Thank you.”  
“Nan, you do not need to thank me for that, I should thank you, that you trusted me enough to come to me. That means the world to me.”  
“And to me Leo. SO, get over it and Thank You.”  
He grinned and nodded his head. “Any time.”  
“So,” Nan said as she sat up on the bed and faced him cross legged, where are we going on this special trip you had planned that you refused to spill the beans about yesterday. I only have so much patience McGarry. I may have to employ my interrogative skills to pry the information from you.”  
“Yeah,” Leo got into the spirit of the exchange? You and what army?”  
“Don’t need an army. McGarry. Not when I have these,” she held up her perfectly manicured, long fingers.”  
“And what do you propose to do with those?”  
Nan jumped him and dug her fingers into the soft flesh around his middle. “Tickle you relentlessly until you give.”  
Leo squirmed to get away from her, laughing like he hadn’t laughed in a very long time. But Nan was not going to let him off easy and she sat on his legs as she moved to tickle his sides and then his neck. Leo was gasping for breath and finally yelled ‘Uncle’ when he couldn’t escape the tickling. She jumped off the bed and did an arms-raised-in-the-air Rocky dance. “Undefeated again. Gray, one. McGarry, zip.”  
Leo was still laughing when he jumped off the bed and grabbed her hands and leaned in to give her a kiss on the cheek. She stilled and looked in his eyes. “The defeated can very carefully hug the victor, McGarry”  
Leo dropped her hands and gently placed his arms around her shoulders. He kissed her cheek, and whispered, “You will pay for that Gray. One day. Beware.”  
“I look forward to it, McGarry,” Nan said as she kissed his cheek.  
She backed away. “Now. Give.”  
Leo laughed again as he headed to the bathroom. She heard the toilet lid hit the tank and seconds later the flush as he finished. He stuck his head around the corner of the door. “If you must know, I have been in negotiations with Lewis all week while he has taken care of all the details. We are going to spend the better part of the morning biking the C&O Canal Towpath.”  
“Oh, wow, Leo. How did you talk Lewis into that?” She ran up and hugged him. Leo shrugged. “I am not without my own skills, missy. Negotiations are what I live for.”  
“Wait, I don’t have a bike, not a working one at least…”  
Lewis retrieved it from your basement and took it to a repair shop and picked it up Friday. Good as new. Actually, per my orders, better than new. It is at your house waiting for us. Lewis took my bike over yesterday.” Leo bragged.  
“You, sir, are a gentleman beyond par. I bow to your greatness…”  
“You are so full of shit,” Leo laughed. Now shower. Lewis also went through your drawers and found your biking stuff. It’s all in the sunroom in a duffle…” he barely finished as she ran from the room and left Leo chuckling and happier than he could remember being in far too many years.

Nan was bursting with excitement as Lewis sat them down to go over the details for the day. Leo just couldn’t stop smiling as he watched her bubble over and clap her hands. “Okay, Lewis. Give.”  
Lewis looked at Leo and rolled his eyes and Leo rolled his eyes back.  
“Knock it off you two. C’mon, Lewis.”  
“Okay. Sit still for fifteen minutes and listen. I am serious.” Lewis pulled out a map with the route marked on it and smoothed it out over the coffee table. “Okay, we will five agents on this today including me. Three on bikes and two in cars. Cruze and I will be shadowing the path along side streets in cars, in constant communication with the three agents on bikes. One agent, Tom McCarty, will ride ahead, scouting the path out before you approach. We will have Agents Bill Keith and Laura Miles on bikes with you, one in front and one behind. They will stay with you at all times. You will ride down 34th to the river front, go over the footbridge to the other side and down onto the path. There are restrooms along the way and I have designated several end points. The first is to Great Falls at the Visitor Center. That is about thirteen miles. There are restrooms there and one before that at Carderock. At that point you can turn around and head back for a twenty-six-mile total. I want to keep to a pace between ten miles and twelve per hour. No faster. We need to be able to anticipate and react if necessary.  
The next stop is Lock 21 and that is about fifteen and a half miles. Depending on how you are doing and the pace, we could turn around to head back or call it and load the bikes and drive back. The furthest I will allow on this trip is Riley’s Lock at twenty-one and a half miles. No turning around at that point. The first stop at Great Falls should take around and hour and a half, a three-hour round trip. To go to Riley’s Lock will take two hours or more with stops and I do not want you out for four hours. Not on the first trip. I have no idea how well you both ride…sir,” Lewis stopped. I know you do okay in the gym, but this is different and you admitted to me it has been over three years since you have ridden out on a path at all.”  
“These are not my conditions. They are the conditions of Agent Butterfield and the Director. No changes. Accept it as is, or you are not going.”  
Nan and Leo looked at each other and smiled. “Okay,” Leo said. Let’s go.”  
“Okay. And just a thought, sir before we go, padded bike shorts, sir? Not a good look.”  
“Very funny Lewis,” Leo said as Nan giggled and checked out his posterior in the padded shorts. “I don’t know. I kinda like it.”  
Leo gave Lewis a ‘see, she likes it’ look and headed for the front door.

At Nan’s house they mounted their bikes along with Agents Keith and Miles. Leo rode a vintage red and white 1984 Cinelli NOS 56 cm bike that he had found on eBay for a mere $3100 dollars. He had new rims and tires put on it and had upgraded the older shifters and derailleurs to modern. New brakes and cables and the bike was like new. It was steel and heavy but he loved the solid feel of the bike on pavement and gravel.  
Nan rode a much newer red 1994 Trek 5500. The two agents rode white aluminum Trek 1200’s. All wearing helmets, gloves and racing jerseys with padded shorts, they took off down the street. Agent Keith took the lead, then Leo followed with Nan behind him and Agent Miles in the rear.  
At the bottom of 34th street at the river they rode down to a metal and wood foot bridge that crossed the Potomac and led down a ramp to the towpath and headed west. The beginning of the trail was pretty open, riding along with the canal on one side and the Potomac visible through the trees to the left, but at the Georgetown Reservoir, the land to the left widened and the trees thickened and they could only see the canal as they rode through thicker and thicker woods.  
They kept a good pace as Leo and Nan rode side by side and talked. Bill in front and Laura behind, as they insisted they be called on the outing, kept a vigilant eye on the surrounding woods.  
Just past the Little Falls Reservoir, the path opened up as it got closer to the Potomac for a short distance, but past Sycamore Island, the path ran back into heavy woods again. At least the trees kept the sun from baking them in the August heat. It was in the high 70’s but the humidity was a brutal 80% and the air was stifling.  
An hour later they approached Great Falls and by consensus, agreed to stop for a bit to pee and hydrate. They found the snack bar on the path just past the visitor center and bought more water while Leo and Nan shared an ice cold can of Coke and an order of fries.  
While they fueled up on carbs, Bill walked over to Leo while keeping his eyes on the trail. “Gotta say, Mr. McGarry, I am pretty impressed with how well you doing today. When Lewis told me what we were doing, I was not expecting you to keep the pace. We’ve been riding around eleven miles per hour almost the whole way and it is slightly uphill.”  
Leo opened his mouth to speak but Nan beat him to it. “I am going to take partial credit for that Bill. I am a vegetarian, probably 80 percent vegan. Leo has been following my diet for the last three months. Almost no dairy at all, no meat, no fish. Occasional eggs and cheese. No snacks, no fried foods. Although I suspect he sneaks a banana nut muffin every now and then.” She looked at him pointedly.  
“Okay, I admit to two muffins. It is an addiction. I am not proud,” he said with a smirk.  
“Well, keep doing what you are doing. It’s working.”  
“Nan is a great cook. I love to cook, but have to admit I have no experience with tofu, so I am learning.”  
“I have no idea what those are,” Bill laughed, and they don’t sound good at all.  
“You would be amazed at how good vegan food is when you have someone who knows how to treat those ingredients.”  
Bill shook his head. “’Afraid not, sir. I will stick to my steak.”  
Laura, who had not joined in the conversation interrupted. “Time we should be moving. Bill nodded and spoke into his wrist mic. “Irish and Babel with detail, on the move.”  
Hydrated and feeling energized, they got back onto the bikes and continued on. They were cruising along at twelve or so mph as they approached Lock 21on the curve just past Lock Island. As they came up on the lock they were following a gentle left hand curve. They couldn’t see beyond the curve because of the heavy growth of trees, and that meant they did not see the two young bikers coming the opposite direction round the curve at a high rate of speed, faster than their twelve miles per hour.  
The first biker flew past Bill, missing him and plowing into Leo’s bike almost head on. They tangled together and started to fall to the ground when the second biker ran into Bill, knocking him from his bike and sending it into the air. The bike landed on top of Leo and the first biker. Nan swerved to avoid the twisted pile of bikes and bodies and ran into Laura who was coming around her on the right also trying to avoid the mess. They plowed into each other and their bikes twisted together and they went down too. For several minutes it was deathly quiet while everyone lay there stunned. Then moans and groans filled the air along with an ouch and from Leo a ‘holy shit.’  
Bill staggered to his feet, limping and leaving a trail of blood in the dirt from a long gash in his shin. Nan bounded to her feet and ran over to Leo who was laying under two bikes and the young man who had nailed him. Laura ran up to Nan and took a moment to check her over. Nan had a gash on her cheek and some scrapes on her right knee and thigh, but said she was fine. Bill muttered into his mic and a few moments later agent McCarty who had been the lead biker, came flying up on his bike to help.  
Bill and McCarty lifted the young man off Leo and then had to yank apart the twisted bikes to get at him. Leo was curled on his right side groaning and holding his right shoulder. His nose was bleeding profusely along with a huge gash on his right forearm. Bill went to turn him over and Leo let out a shout of agony.  
“God damn, Bill. Be careful. I think my shoulder is dislocated, maybe broken.”  
Bill and McCarty carefully moved him onto his back and Bill took off his helmet and the sunglasses which had gouged into the bridge of his nose. He then unzipped his jersey and with Nan’s help pulled it over his head and then off of his arm.  
Leo’s shoulder was very obviously dislocated and badly. A large rounded lump was pushed up in front of his shoulder and his arm hung useless. “That’s the head of his humerus,” Bill explained when Nan brushed her fingers over the lump. Leo groaned again and tried to turn on his side.  
“Sir, lay still…”  
“It hurts like hell in this position. Please let me lay on my left side,” Leo begged.  
“Sorry sir. I need you to stay on your back. I am immobilizing your head also in case of a spine injury.”  
Leo started coughing violently and sprayed everyone with blood. “Leo,” Nan cried. “Nan, sorry. It’s okay. I think I just have blood running down the back of my throat. “  
Bill looked at his nose. “I think his nose is broken too. Just keep swallowing sir.”  
“Shit, Bill. That’s easy for you to say,” as he coughed again.  
Bill took Leo’s jersey and wrapped it around his arm to try and stop the bleeding. “This is gonna need a few stitches sir.”  
Leo groaned again. “Great. Just bloody…”  
“Sir, please. Stop talking and do not move your head.”  
A few minutes later sirens approached and Lewis’ car skidded to a stop in the parking lot by the white metal building that housed rest rooms. Lewis flew down the short road and over the bridge that connect to the trail. As he knelt in the dirt next to Leo more sirens approached and a helicopter appeared overhead. Two ambulances arrived along with numerous police cars and unmarked Suburbans from which Secret Service agents piled out of fanning out into the woods and down the trail in both directions. One set of paramedics rushed over to the two young men who had caused the crash while another team headed for Leo.  
“Lewis put his hand on Leo’s forehead and his eyes flew open. “Oh, god, Lewis. Hey, I fell off my bike.” And his eyes fluttered closed again. Lewis looked at Bill. “I think he’s in a little shock and a ton of pain.”  
Lewis took in the blood soaked jersey on his arm and the protruding lump on his shoulder. Leo coughed again and blood trickled from his mouth. He ran his hands over his arms and legs and then his chest. “Do you hurt anywhere else, sir? Any pain?”  
“I don’t think so, Lewis.”  
“Okay. We need to move him. That shoulder will need to be reduced quickly to avoid damage. The helicopter cannot land here so we get him on a gurney, then the ambulance can drive up the road here to the main road where the house at the intersection has a large enough yard for the chopper to land. They have a driveway which leads right to the back yard.  
Lewis walked over to Nan who was being held by agent Miles. “Ms. Gray, he is going to be okay. How are you? That’s a nasty gash.” Nan nodded that she was okay as he held her by the arm. “Laura, get her over to the ambulance. She can ride in with Mr. McGarry on the chopper. Remember, we need to provide anonymity for her. We should make it to GW before the news crews hit. That is your priority.” Miles nodded and walked Nan toward the bridge and to the waiting ambulance.  
Paramedics pushed a gurney over the bridge and rushed over to Leo. They put a C collar around his neck to immobilize his head. They discarded the jersey and quickly wrapped a pad and gauze around his forearm and then strapped his arm to his chest with a wide Ace wrap. The two paramedics and six agents gathered around Leo and lifted him onto the gurney. Leo screamed in pain when his shoulder moved and almost blacked out. Once on the soft gurney he felt better and opened his eyes.  
He saw Nan sitting inside the ambulance when they slid him in. “Nan. Baby. Are you okay?”  
“Yes. Just a gash on the cheek. Some scratches.” She reached out and held his left hand. He squeezed hers and held on tight as one of the paramedics jumped inside the ambulance and the doors slammed. “Take it slow,” he yelled up to the driver as the ambulance started back up to the main road. Minutes later, the doors opened and Leo saw a helicopter landing on the grass.  
His gurney was pulled out of the back and a mass of agents carried it to the waiting chopper. As the gurney was locked into place in the chopper several agents lifted Nan into the chopper and strapped her in a seat next to Leo. Lewis jumped into the chopper and the door was shut as it lifted into the air. The paramedic that had treated him on the path was taking his pulse and checked the bandages around his arm. The gauze was almost soaked through, so he wrapped more around it.  
He saw Nan staring at the blood soaked gauze. “Ma’am. It’s not that bad. It’s deep. That’s all.”  
She just nodded and tightened her grip on Leo’s hand.

CJ Cregg sat at her desk and finished the last email she had to send out. She shut down her computer and realized she might have the whole afternoon of her Saturday left. She stood and grabbed her bag and stepped into the bullpen on her way out when she saw Ron Butterfield heading through the lobby, with a contingent of agents in tow then head down the hall toward the Oval. She went through the lobby to Toby’s office. She knew he was still in.  
“Hey, Toby,” she said as she walked into his office.  
“Why don’t people knock before they just come waltzing into my…what?” He stopped when he saw CJ’s face.  
“I don’t know what’s going on Toby, but I just saw Ron trailed by at least five or six agents heading for the Oval.  
“God, now what,” he muttered as he jumped to his feet and headed toward the Oval with CJ right behind. They came to a halt in Debbie’s office and could hear voices and then an outburst from the President.  
“GW? How bad is it?” The door opened and an agent came out to use Debbie’s phone. President Bartlet saw Toby and CJ standing outside the door and waved them in. “Ron? How bad?” Ron was holding his hand to his ear piece listening.  
Bartlet walked over the CJ and Toby. “Leo is being choppered to GW as we speak. CJ gasped and Toby looked grim. “What’s happened?”  
Bartlet started to speak and stopped when Ron came over. “Okay. Preliminary word is he is gonna be okay. Badly dislocated shoulder. Broken nose and a pretty bad wound to the forearm. They are also concerned about a possible head and neck injury. They will triage him and let us know his status as soon as they land.”  
“What the hell happened Ron,” the President demanded?  
“Biking accident sir.”  
The President, Toby and CJ didn’t say anything for a minute and then the President said, “Biking accident? Really? Leo?”  
“Sir. I approved the trip. He had five agents with him. They could not foresee two young men, racing each other, coming around a blind curve. They plowed into Leo and the agents. It was pretty violent as Leo and his team was apparently cruising at twelve miles an hour and the two boys were probably cruising at twelve or thirteen, so the combined speed of the collision could have been as high as thirty miles per hour. Ever been hit in a car going thirty? Think about that happening on a bicycle with no protection but a helmet.”  
“What the hell was Leo doing on a bike…where the hell were they,” Toby demanded?  
“One of the reasons we were okay with this was they were on the Chesapeake and Ohio towpath. No vehicle traffic, not a lot of people, should have been perfectly safe. Mr. McGarry has taken up an exercise program involving biking, some free weights and light boxing. He has been working with a couple of agents in the gym under my supervision. This was just an unfortunate accident.”  
“Ya think.” Toby grumbled. Exercise. Leo. Next you’ll tell me he is a vegan health nut.”  
Ron raised an eyebrow. CJ laughed. “Leo? Vegan?”  
“Well perhaps not vegan, but he has amended his diet and has given up meat and dairy.” Ron stopped to listen to his earpiece. They are getting ready to land at GW. I will update you shortly.  
“Sir, CJ and I will go to GW. It might help to have someone he knows there.”

CJ and Toby arrived at GW just minutes later courtesy of a Secret Service ride. The agents at the door to the ER let them in. They saw a crowd of people around a cubicle straight ahead and then they heard the McGarry roar.  
“God damn it all to hell,” they heard him yell as they ran up to the doorway. He was being transferred to a stretcher from the gurney and the motion jarred his shoulder. CJ could see his right side and arm covered in blood. They laid him flat and the movement stirred up the blood in his nose and throat and he started to cough again, spraying blood over the people around him.  
“What the hell. Is he bleeding into the lungs?”  
CJ grabbed onto Toby as the ER staff swarmed over Leo. “No. It’s blood from a broken nose. He’s on his back. He’s bleeding down his throat. Pack his nose. Try to stop the bleeding.”  
A nurse came up to CJ and Toby and whisked them away to a waiting room on the other side of the ER. Twenty minutes later Josh and Sam burst into the waiting area. Josh ran up to CJ as she stood and hugged her. “What happened to Leo? They just told us he was being helicoptered to GW.”  
Toby smirked and rubbed his beard. “A bicycle accident.”  
Josh paused, opened his mouth to speak, closed it, looked confused and then just sat down. Sam gaped at Toby and slumped into the chair next to Josh.  
“A bicycle accident? What the hell, we thought he was really hurt, or shot or had a heart attack or something.”  
CJ sat next to Sam. “He is hurt, Sam. When we saw him there was blood everywhere, he was coughing blood and spraying people. He was writhing on the stretcher, his shoulder looked awful. They said it was dislocated. All the blood came from a horrible open wound on the inside of his forearm and his nose is broken.”  
“How the hell do you get that injured on a bike? Was he hit by a car,” Josh asked as he ran his hands through his hair?  
“We don’t know a lot. Just that they were on the C&O towpath…” CJ started to explain.  
“What the hell is the C&O towpath,” Josh half yelled?  
“Josh, c’mon, settle down. It is a path that goes along the C&O canal which runs beside the Potomac. I have jogged it more than a few times. It’s actually kinda nice. Anyway, they were riding along up by Seneca at a pretty good rate of speed when two young guys, racing, came around a blind curve and plowed into them. The first guy nailed Leo head on and they went down as their lead agent got hit by the second guy. His bike flew up in the air and landed on Leo along with the guy that hit him and their bikes. That’s all I know. He was helicoptered in within twenty minutes of the accident.”  
“Was anyone else hurt?”  
“Leo took the brunt of it, apparently.”

Leo was doing his level best to stay conscious as the ER crew worked on him. The pain in his face almost overshadowed the pain in his shoulder when they packed his nose with gauze. “Holy hell, that hurts,” he yelled as the young doctor on his left packed a strip of gauze into his nostrils. “Sorry, sir.”  
Leo shifted his butt on the stretcher, trying to get a little more comfortable and felt a stabbing pain in his left groin. He sucked in a breath and shifted again. ‘What the hell. Probably pulled something,’ he thought.  
“Okay, Mr. McGarry, we need to get this shoulder reduced. The longer we wait the more damage to the muscles and tendons. We need you relaxed for this…”  
“No drugs,” Leo moaned.  
“No sir,” said the older ER doc in charge. Not at this moment. I know your history. We are gonna give you a few healthy shots of nitrous oxide, better known as laughing gas,” the doctor explained as a facemask was placed over his face. The anesthesiologist on ER duty tightened down the mask and pulled Leo’s chin back a bit. The oxygen flowing through the mask was cold on his face. He smelled something metallic and then he could taste it on his tongue. “Take a deep breath, Mr. McGarry…that’s good, another one…and another.”  
As soon as Leo’s head fell to the side the ER doctor and an intern moved to his shoulder and with one good pull, Leo’s shoulder popped into place with a loud click.  
“That was easy,” the intern said. “Yup, put ‘em out and you can reduce it just like that. When they are awake, they fight it and are too tense. Okay,” the older doctor said. While he is out let’s debride and irrigate that forearm wound and see what we got going on. It’s still bleeding. I want to get that all stitched up while he is out.” He turned to the anesthesiologist. “Joe, keep him under until we finish.”  
Joe nodded and adjusted the flow of gas from the workstation at his side. He double checked the leads on Leo’s chest and side and looked at the EKG monitor. The blood pressure cuff on his arm inflated automatically as it took his blood pressure.  
While the nurse and intern were working on Leo’s arm the head doctor walked over to Lewis who had never moved from his place by the door. “Is there anyone here with him I can update? Family?”  
“His…um…sir, can I count on your discretion? This is not for any public consumption. His girl…um lady friend, girl friend is here. She was on the ride with him. They just finished suturing her cheek. She…we…would appreciate an update.”  
“No worry. Where is she?”  
Lewis pointed to the room across the hall from where Leo was. The doctor waked over and knocked on the door. “Ma’am? Are you with Mr. McGarry?”  
Nan looked over at the doctor in the doorway. “Yes. I am,” she said as she slipped her feet to the floor and stood. She held out her hand to stop him when he reached out to help her. “I am fine. How is Le…Mr. McGarry?” “He is doing okay. We have him sedated. I reduced his shoulder, put it back in place, and they are cleaning up the arm wound and will stitch it up.”  
“Thank you, so much.” Nan sat down in the chair next to the stretcher and pushed her hand through her hair. I really…” she began but stopped when the doctor turned as his intern yelled for him to get back in the room. She watched him run across the hall and followed him to the doorway where Lewis stopped her and held her by the door.  
A flurry of activity erupted around Leo.  
“What the hell,” the head doc yelled as they pulled off Leo’s biking shorts. How did we miss this?”  
The anesthesiologist was hanging another bag of saline as the doctor prodded at the lump that even Nan could see on the front of Leo’s hip. “SHIT. There is something in there. He is bleeding into the groin. I feel something sharp in here. Get a c-arm in here STAT. I need to see what’s going on.”  
Moments later a portable fluoroscopy machine was wheeled in and the doctor pulled on a lead apron as everyone else but the x-ray tech moved away from the table. The tech slid a pedal across the floor to the doctor while he centered the cylindrical top of the machine that housed the detector and sent the image to the TV monitor on the cart next to the x-ray tech. He stepped on the pedal and an image of Leo’s hip bones filled the monitor. A black thin object about five to six inches long angled across the image. The doctor then probed Leo’s hip again and the tip of a long metal wire was visible.  
“Shit. I think this is part of a broken spoke.” Leo’s hip was swelling even more and was beginning to darken and change color. “I think his Iliac artery has been compromised.”  
The anesthesiologist was squeezing the saline bag that he had hung. “His pressure is dropping. The accident was almost 45 minutes ago now. He has been bleeding into the groin for at least that long and I may need to start a transfusion.” The EKG monitor started dinging like crazy and a bell on the anesthesia machine stated dinging too.  
“We gotta get to the OR. Call up and get a suite ready. Tell them we are on the way. Now. Stop with the arm. It can wait. We have a possible, likely, Iliac artery tear.” The room erupted with as more personnel ran into the room and started preparing Leo for a trip to the OR. The head doctor saw Nan standing there with Lewis and called over.  
“This is bad, but he is gonna be okay. We found it. We can repair the tear easily. You,” he nodded at Lewis, “need to take her to the waiting room. The nurse will show you. I will have someone bring you up the OR waiting area as soon as possible.”  
Nan was trying desperately to believe the doctor and not break down sobbing, but she was not having much luck. Lewis held her around the waist as he walked Nan down the hall behind the nurse to the waiting room. When they walked in Lewis was surprised to see the Senior staff huddled around a table. They watched with curious expressions as they saw the bandage on her face and he sat Nan on a couch near a window and grabbed a box of Kleenex her saw on a table. He put it in her lap and sat next to her. She grabbed a fistful of tissue and held it to her face. Her shoulders were shaking as she cried and Lewis could just sit by her and wait. Moments later she lifted her head and nodded at Lewis.  
The door opened again and agent Miles, from the bike ride, still in her jersey and shorts, stepped into the room. “Sir,” she said to Lewis and held up a hanger with clothes and a bag.  
“Thanks. Did you leave an agent on the door?”  
“Yes sir. Should we have gotten some clothing for Mr. McGarry too?”  
That made Josh yank his head around to watch the scene on the other side of the room. Now CJ, Toby and Sam were watching to. At that moment Lewis did not care.  
“No. He is probably going to be here longer than we thought. Look,” he said as he stood and looked over at Josh and crew. Help her change, okay? There is a restroom across the hall.” Agent Miles helped Nan to her feet and walked with her out of the waiting room. Lewis walked over to the table and nodded at the four.  
“Ms. Cregg, Mr. Ziegler, Mr. Lyman, Mr. Seaborn. Hs anyone updated you yet on Mr. McGarry’s condition?”  
“No,” CJ spoke up. “Who is the woman you came in with Lewis?”  
Lewis ignored the question. “They are rushing Mr. McGarry up to surgery right now. It is urgent but I am told not critical at this point.”  
They all tried to talk at once but CJ won out. “Surgery? What the hell Lewis? He fell off a bike.”  
“Ms. Cregg, it was a pretty violent collision. His shoulder has been fixed but while they were working on his arm, his blood pressure and pulse started dropping. They started going over him again. Looking for another injury and discovered what appeared to be a six-inch chunk of broken wheel spoke in his groin. It must have punctured and then broke off during the crash. There was no bleeding and he did not indicate that he felt pain anywhere but his shoulder and arm.”  
“How bad is it,” Toby asked?  
“Well he been bleeding out into the groin for almost an hour. His Iliac artery is damaged and they have to go in open him up and repair the artery. Then there is the shock and blood loss issue, but overall the doctors are optimistic.”  
“Wow. All this from a biking accident,” Sam exhaled shaking his head.  
CJ looked over at Nan who had come back into the room with Laura Miles. She helped Nan to sit and then sat beside her and placed the tissue box close by. CJ looked her over. noting the change of clothing from biking gear to dark slim jeans and a navy long sleeved tee with a state department logo on it and sneakers. She looked to CJ to be in her forties and was pretty… no, striking, in a wholesome and natural way. The gauze on her cheek could not take away from her beauty. Her shoulder length brown hair had hints of red-gold in it. She was lithe and trim. Athletic.  
Lewis saw her looking at Nan. “Who is she, Lewis? She was in biking gear. Was she involved in the crash with Leo?” Lewis didn’t answer but jumped up and walked over as Ron Butterfield came into the room trailing agents behind him. Ron looked around the room and winced slightly when he saw the Senior Staff. The agents spread around the room and another female agent sat next to Nan. Ron stepped up to her and squatted own before her.  
Although he spoke softly, they could all hear him speak. “Ms. Gray. I am so sorry. I have spoken to the doctor, and they are very optimistic about his recovery. So try not to worry too much.” “Thank you Agent Butterfield. And I never got the chance to thank you when you came by to see me after Leo and I had our…problem. I was very pissed with you at you at the time, but I really appreciate you coming to me. Thanks.”  
Ron just nodded his head. “The reason I am here is we have a situation now.”  
The four staff were almost falling out of their chairs eavesdropping on the conversation between Ron and Nan. “The young man who ran into Leo has been found to be more seriously injured than we thought. His neck was broken in the accident and he is at this time paralyzed. He was taken by ambulance to Holy Cross Germantown Hospital as it was the closest to get to on the roads by ambulance. They believe the paralysis may be temporary from the nature of the injury and he is being taken to surgery. His father is irate and is irrationally threatening Leo and anyone who was involved. It turns out he is with the Iranian embassy. As a precaution we are assigning you a detail that will be with you 24/7 and will work in concert with Leo’s detail when you are together.”  
“But why is he doing this. His son ran into us. He was the one at fault.”  
“He seems to think his son should have been helicoptered to the hospital and not Leo who only had a dislocated shoulder. Anyway, they will be moving you up to the recovery waiting area shortly. Leo is now in the OR suite.”  
“Thank you. Thank you for everything.” Ron nodded and went to talk with Lewis and the other agents. They huddled together for a few minutes and then Ron left. Lewis went to sit with Nan. “Can I get you anything?”  
“No,” Nan said as she hugged herself and shuddered. “I am okay.”  
“Let me know if you want to go home, or to Mr. McGarry’s apartment. I suspect you will be hanging around here for a while though, huh?” Lewis smiled and touched her shoulder. He stood and walked over to talk to Cruze who had entered the room while he was talking to Nan.  
Toby stood up suddenly and left the room. He returned fifteen minutes later with a tray holding a carafe of coffee, Styrofoam cups and assorted sweeteners and a bunch of those little plastic containers of cream. He set the tray on the table he, CJ, Sam and Josh were using. He then walked over to Nan and cleared his throat. “Coffee,” he asked when she looked up at him?  
She gazed at him for a moment, then nodded. “Yes. Thank you.”  
Toby held out his hand to her and helped her stand. He walked her over to the table where Sam pulled up a another chair and held it for her to sit. She watched while Toby poured her a cup and placed it before her. He handed her a container of cream. “No thank you. But I will take a packet of sugar.” Toby handed it to her with a red plastic stirrer. The whole time Josh, CJ and Sam just watched. Nan picked up the cup and sipped. She grimaced and put down the cup.  
“God, that’s awful.” Her comment seemed to break the ice and they all laughed. Toby sat next to her and leaned on the table.  
“Hi. My name is Toby Ziegler…”  
“I do know who you all are Mr. Ziegler. Ms. Cregg, Mr. Lyman. Mr. Seaborn,” she nodded at each as she spoke their name.  
“Okay. Well, you have us at a disadvantage then. We do not know who you are.”  
Lewis had come over to the table and stood behind Nan. “That is not information that you have to know, Mr. Ziegler. Ms. Gray? Do you want to come sit over…”?  
“No, Lewis. It’s okay. Leo and I have been talking about who we would tell and when. Now seems to be as good a time as any. But Lewis, we only meant to tell Leo’s closest staff, so…”  
“Ma’am.”  
“Thank you, Lewis. So Mr. Ziegler. You feel at a disadvantage. I am sorry about that. You had a question?”  
Toby cleared his throat and fidgeted, pulling at his beard under Nan’s frank gaze. “I did. You were in biking clothing when you first came in the room. You have an injury to your cheek. And after the visit from Ron, I am confident in assuming you were with Leo when he was injured.”  
Nan nodded. “Yes. I was with Leo. He had planned this bike trip as a surprise for me. We have been wanting to get out and ride. So he planned this with Lewis. We rode out from my house this morning. I never thought the day would end like this.” CJ reached out and held her hand.  
“Nan, right,” CJ asked?  
Nan nodded. “Nan Gray.”  
“So Nan, how do you know Leo?”  
Nan looked down at her trembling hands. She hated to do this without Leo, but they were asking questions now and she didn’t think blowing them off would work. The cat was literally out of the bag and running amok.


	6. Chapter VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Secret Service was still on the job though. Two agents stood outside Leo’s door and four more lined the hall from Leo’s room to the elevator. Four agents also watched the lobby, checking all who entered the elevators. For now, Leo and Nan were safe.

CHAPTER VI

Nan took a deep breath and turned to face CJ, hoping this might be easier with a woman. Toby Ziegler glared at her while Josh Lyman stared at her with a confused look on his face and Sam Seaborn would not look her in the eye. Only CJ made her feel comfortable.  
“Well, we have been wanting, Leo has been wanting, to tell his friends, you, the people he works with most closely, about our relationship.”  
“So it’s a relationship,” Toby said still glaring at her. Nan swallowed the lump in her throat.  
“Stop it Tobus. She is going through a lot right now.” CJ touched Nan’s knee. “He’s more bark than bite. Go ahead.”  
“Yes, Mr. Ziegler, it is a relationship.”  
“How long?”  
“Six months.”  
“SIX MONTHS. How the hell did you…”?  
“Josh,” CJ yelled when Nan jumped.  
Nan bit her lip and looked at CJ. Now or never. “Leo and I met at a coffee shop near his apartment…”  
“Apartment? He moved out of…”  
“Josh…”  
“Ah’kay”  
“Uh, yes, a coffee shop. He used to spend his Sunday mornings off, when he had them, drinking coffee and reading, sitting outside and enjoying the weather. We met six months ago, by chance.” Nan paused and took a breath. “I did not know who he was. He told me his name was Mack. Before you ask, he always wore a baseball cap low over his face and dark glasses. He dressed down almost to the point of scruffy. So you can see that even if I suspected he was the famous Leo McGarry, I would never believe he would be seen in public the way he was dressed. He told me later his agent insisted that if was going to be sitting in public like a target he had to be in disguise.”  
“But I did not know this, and when I asked him to take off the hat and glasses, he declined and when asked for more information, now on our third ‘date’, he also declined. I told him I might not even show up the next week, if he was unwilling to be more forth coming, and I left. The next Sunday, I went and he finally removed the hat and glasses and had dressed up more. I freaked out and Lewis freaked out because he exposed himself. I panicked, for reasons I will NOT go into now. I was terrified and I threw his book at him. Lewis and Cruze grabbed me and Leo got upset and there was screaming and I grabbed my stuff and ran.”  
“I thought it was over. I was upset… But I couldn’t be with him, with Leo McGarry. Not ‘Leo’ the person, but Leo mthe persona, the White House Chief of Staff. The public, well known, powerful persona. I didn’t go back to the coffee shop. I didn’t see him for a month, then I ran into him in the Situation Room, Nancy McNally introduced us, and I felt like it was happening all over again.”  
Nan stopped and held her face in her hands. She rubbed her temples and faced CJ again. “Nancy is my best friend and my boss.”  
“REALLY,” CJ exclaimed.  
Nan smiled. She knew the kind of reputation Nancy had and it didn’t conjure up images of best friend-ness and sisterhood. “Yes.”  
“So you work at State? What do you do there?”  
“Anything and all to do with language. I am a linguist and I run the translation department. We translate foreign documents, provide translators, break down the nuance of diplomatic language…look, what I do there is not important. Anyway, Nancy watched as Leo and I almost imploded again and we both ran from the sit room, in opposite directions. Nancy followed me to my office in the Truman building and made me come clean. She knew I had been seeing someone, but not who. She convinced me to meet with Leo and explain my fears to him. Tell him why I ran. She convinced me to give him another chance.” Nan breathed hard through her nose. She was not comfortable with this. She didn’t want to be doing this. Not now. Not without Leo.  
“Then she went to Leo and told him to get his ass to the coffee shop the next Sunday and to shut up and listen to what I had to say.”   
“We got back together, more or less started over, back at the coffee shop just over four months ago.”  
“So this is secret. Why? You are obviously two consenting adults, you don’t work together, how old are you Nan?”  
“Forty-five.”  
“So you are ten years apart. Respectable. He is not robbing the cradle. Why keep it a secret?”  
“Because of me. Because I can’t…right now I can’t handle the publicity. Being in the public eye. I am still working through a…coming to terms with…” Nan rubbed her face again. “I can’t go into that right now. Please.” Nan stood abruptly and went over to sit on the couch were Lewis was standing. The door opened and a nurse walked in. “I am here to escort you all to the recovery waiting room. Please come with me.” The nurse walked to Nan and took her elbow when she stood. “They told me to tell you that Mr. McGarry is doing well. The surgery is proceeding as they planned and he is stable.”  
Nan touched her hand and thanked her.

In the recovery waiting room Nan sat on one side surrounded by agents and CJ, Toby, Josh and Sam sat on the other side. Donna, Margaret and Charlie were now there sitting with the senior staff, quietly talking. Donna and Charlie threw curious glances toward Nan, but she didn’t notice. She sat staring at the large window by the door, watching but not really seeing the hospital staff walking by.  
A flurry of activity in the hall got everyone’s attention. The door to the waiting room opened and Ron Butterfield walked in followed by the President and his detail. Ron looked around the room, noticing and then ignoring the staff in the far corner. President Bartlet nodded at them then turned to look at Nan. He shoved his hands in his pockets, unsure what to say. He was, if he was honest with himself, pissed that Leo had kept this secret from him.  
Ron pulled the President to the far side of the room and called Lewis over. They talked in hushed tones for almost ten minutes, the President asking questions and looking over at Nan as they spoke. Finally, he held up his hands and stopped them and walked over and sat next to Nan. Nan started when she realized someone had sat next to her then jumped to her feet when she saw it was the President.  
“Mr. President. I am sorry.”  
“Please. Ms. Gray. I am sorry. Sit. C’mon, sit down,” he sat and patted the couch cushion next to him. Nan sat with her hands clenched, trying to stop them from trembling. “So. From what Lewis and Ron have told me you and Leo have been seeing each other for some time.”  
“Yes sir. Six months.”  
“Six months.”  
“Yes.”  
“Well, I assume this is a serious thing then, huh?”  
Nan lips quirked into the beginning of a smile. “You could say that, sir.”  
“I understand you work at State and you are friends with Nancy McNally.”  
“Sir. I have been at State twelve years. Translation, linguistics. You have in all likelihood read many of my reports.”  
“I realize that now, although I would not have had any idea who you were.”  
“Yes sir. Just a nameless cog…”  
“Obviously a very talented cog, from what I have learned in the last hour. Nancy came to see me, she sends her thoughts and prayers, by the way. She cannot get away at the moment.” Nan nodded. “Three doctorates, 50+ languages, you teach at Georgetown and you have published 5 books. I don’t know how you have escaped my knowing you. I have one of your books. I have not read it, but I realized I have a copy.”  
He reached and took Nan’s left hand and held in both of his. “I am aware of what happened to you in Iran seven years ago. Can I say I am so sorry? You endured quite an ordeal and I am very glad that you appear to have overcome it quite well.”  
Nan pulled her hand from his rather abruptly and clasped her hands in her lap as she moved away from him, almost imperceptibly. But move she did, putting an extra inch between them. “I won’t discuss this now. Or here. This is personal…” Nan turned away as tears formed in her eyes. She took a deep breath and steeled herself. She sat up straighter and looked at the President.   
“I am not here to be questioned and grilled. I am here because the man I…the man I love has been injured. Leo is the only reason we are here. Not me. This stops, now, or I will leave.” She stood and looked at Lewis. He headed for her, bringing the agent who had been on the ride with them, Laura Miles.   
“Ms. Gray, Agent Miles is going to be your personal agent. She will be with you at all times.” Laura nodded and Nan smiled, but she didn’t want this. At all. She turned to Lewis and spoke quietly. “Lewis, is this really necessary? I don’t need this. Really.”  
“Ms. Gray, did you get everything that Agent Butterfield told you earlier? About the young man who hit Leo?”  
“Yes, I think so. His father is upset and is angry. I get that.”  
“Ms. Gray, the father is a career diplomat. He is a high level assistant to the Ambassador…of Iran.”  
Nan continued to look at him, not understanding…until it hit her. Lewis watched as all the color drained from her face and her mouth fell open. He grabbed her by the elbow and led her back to the sofa and helped her sit. “Now, do you understand?”  
She watched him with wide eyes and nodded her head. Her hands trembled as she held them to her mouth. Laura Miles sat on her left, not touching her, respecting her space, but there, close by, if she needed it. Nan sat back onto the couch and rested her forehead on her hand and concentrated on breathing. One breath after the other. Just breathe.  
The President walked over to the table to sit down between Josh and CJ. They all exchanged glances and shrugged. “What the hell, sir? Why the secrecy? Who the hell is she anyway…”  
“Knock it off Josh. Just drop it for now, would ya? She is right. This is not about her. This is about Leo. Besides, this is none of our business.”  
“Whadaya mean, none of our business…of course it is our business. Leo works with us…we don’t know if she…”  
Toby hit the table with his fist, causing everyone in the room to look. “No. NOT our business. Their business. This is Leo’s and her life. Not ours. Theirs. Private. There must be a reason they kept this private and we should respect that.”  
Bartlet agreed with Toby. Toby was sometimes remarkably able to understand a situation, understand the people and get to the heart of it.  
“Toby is right…”  
“Nahhh,” Josh protested. “Look, she could be dangerous…”  
“Really? It looks to me like the Secret Service is more than aware and better informed than we are about the relationship between her and Leo. You can bet she’s been vetted every which way since Sunday. She even has a sympathetic Ron on her side. I don’t think we have to worry about that.” Toby sat back down. “Drop it Josh. When Leo wants us to know, we will.”  
Everyone sat quietly absorbed with their own thoughts when the door to the waiting room opened and a doctor in OR scrubs stepped in. He was taken aback by the six agents in black suits in the room and came to attention when he recognized the President. “Sir? I am Dr. Severn, Paul Severn. I performed the surgery on Mr. McGarry. He is…”  
Bartlet held up his hand to stop him. “I think you need to be talking to Ms. Gray.”  
He looked around the room and Agent Miles stood up beside Nan. “Dr. This is Nan Gray, Mr. McGarry’s partner. She was also involved in the accident.” Dr. Severn eyed the gauze on her cheek, and turned to face her, reaching out to take her hand.  
“Ms. Gray. Forgive me, I was not told Mr. McGarry’s partner was here. As I was going to say, I performed his surgery. He is recovery and should be awake very soon.”  
“The surgery went well,” Nan asked?  
He smiles. “Yes ma’am, it went very well. We had to make a rather large incision, to assess the damage, but do not worry. It will be fine. The bike spoke that broke and punctured his groin actually damaged the external Iliac artery which becomes the femoral artery. The spoke entered his upper thigh near the groin and proceeded up and at an angle that mirrored the anatomy of the internal iliac. If it had just punctured and gone through and through, it would have been better, but the spoke skimmed the artery and tore a two-inch gash in the artery. Along the gash, not all of it went through to the lumen…the inside of the vessel, but at two places it did, and this was where he was bleeding from. The repair of the vessel took some time as we had to be sure it was completely closed without compromising the lumen. We then opted to do a visual exploratory to make sure his bladder and bowel were not compromised. We are satisfied no other damage has occurred.  
“We then also opted to close the wound in his arm while he was under. That required some time and over 100 sutures. He may have issues with that arm in the future. There was some damage to the muscles and specifically to one of the flexor tendons that run medially. He may lose functionality of the ring finger and fifth finger. We will have to see how he is after he heals. Physical therapy can help a lot. We sutured the tendon but it was pretty damaged. So that is pretty much it. Are you okay? I am sorry, that is kind of a lot to take in.”  
Nan nodded. “Thank you doctor. I am relieved the surgery is over. Over all though, he is going to be fine?”  
“Oh, yes ma’am. He is in really good shape, great muscle tone, heart and lungs are strong, he should heal up fast and be riding again soon.”  
Nan frowned at that. “Thank you doctor. When can I see him?”  
“The nurse will be in to get you when he wakes up and they check his vitals a few times. Really, he is going to be fine.” He turned and left the room.

Nan stood at the foot of the bed, unsure if she should wake him. She was afraid to approach the bed, to bump it, to reach out, to touch him. There was an icepack secured to his right shoulder and his right arm was encased in gauze dressings from elbow to finger tips and was resting on a pillow. A heavy strip of tape covered the bridge of his nose which was still packed with bloody gauze. Heavy bruising was beginning to color his face around the eyes and cheekbones.   
His left leg was also raised on a pillow and she could see a large lump under the hospital gown, over his hip where the surgical dressings had been applied. He breathed easily though and that gave her comfort. A nurse came in and looked at the monitors above the bed and then injected something from a syringe into his IV.  
“Isn’t he cold,” she asked, concerned that he was uncovered, exposed in the bed but for the gown laying over him.  
“I can get some blankets, but he is okay.”  
“Please,” Nan asked softly. The nurse smiled and came back quickly with a stack of warm blankets. She took the time to cover Leo, leaving his leg exposed, and his right arm, but tucking the blanket in to cover the rest of him.  
“Thank you,” Nan whispered.  
“He is okay,” the nurse, observing her reluctance to get closer. “Why don’t you sit here and hold his hand,” she moved a chair close to the bed on Leo’s left side. She held the chair for Nan, and settled her as close as the chair would go. “Go ahead. He has asked for you.”  
Nan gently took Leo’s hand in hers and caressed the back of it with her thumb, watching his face, watching his breathing. After several minutes he began to stir, turning his head and lightly moaning. He tried to shift his hips and hissed in pain and opened his eyes. “Leo, lay still. Try not to move too much.”   
He turned his head to look at her, confused for a moment, searching her face, trying to remember. Then recognition dawned and he raised his head, wincing in pain.  
“Nan. Oh my god. Are you okay,” he asked, his breath harsh and his voice gravelly? Where am I?”  
“GW. I am okay,” she took his hand as he reached out to touch the gauze on her cheek with the back of his fingers. “Just a small cut. A few stitches. How do you feel, besides like a truck ran over you?” She smiled and kissed his fingers.  
Leo smiled and sighed. “You are okay, so I am just fine. And yeah, did you get the plate number of the truck?”  
Nan giggled, always amazed at Leo’s ability to take any situation and inject a smart ass remark and humor into it. She sighed with relief. This was her Leo, and he was okay.  
“Oh, hey, was anyone else hurt? That was crazy,” he closed his eyes remembering the crash. I barely remember what happened. It was so fast.”  
“Bill has a pretty nasty wound on his shin, but he is already back in his suit and on duty. Laura was uninjured. The young man that hit you is apparently paralyzed with a neck injury.”  
“No,” Leo whispered. She could see the pain in his eyes. “Not your fault, so don’t even go there McGarry. The accident was his fault, and although I am distressed he is injured, we, you, none of us is to blame. He was reckless. I hope he is okay, but do not take any blame for this.”  
“Yeah, I know. Okay.”  
Nan sat back down and held his hand with her left while she stroked his face with her other hand. His eyes fluttered closed and his breathing deepened as he fell asleep. She didn’t know how long she sat there, gazing at him, holding his hand, thanking god he was okay, when the door opened and someone stepped up to her side. She looked up and saw the President. His eyes were on Leo. She turned her eyes back to him and continued to lightly stroke his cheek.  
“I am really sorry. I had no right, no right to push you. Forgive me.” The words were simple and spoken easily. Nan looked up at him. “Thank you. I am not trying to keep anything from you. It was the wrong time. I was upset and I got angry at you.”  
“You were right to do so. So, how is he doing,” the President asked with a wry smile, looking at Leo lovingly.  
“He was awake for a bit. He was concerned about everyone. I told him about the young man who was hurt. I shouldn’t have…”  
“He blamed himself,” Bartlet said.  
“He tried.”  
He smiled, “Good for you.”  
“Jed,” Leo said softly from the bed. Jed turned his eyes to Leo with a smile. “Slacker. What ya won’t do to get a pretty lady to hold your hand and moon over you.”  
Nan blushed and squeezed Leo’s hand. “Beautiful lady, Jed. I take it you have met?”  
“Not properly and not under the best circumstances, Leo,” he admitted.  
Leo looked at them both and knew something had occurred that was bothering them both. “Okay then. Jed, meet Nan Rose Gray, the most amazing woman I have ever met, whom I love with all my heart.” Nan’s eyes filled with tears and she fought to keep them from falling. “Nan, my love, this guy, god help me, has been my best friend for forty years, Jed Bartlet. There, formal introduction. Now, Jed, kiss her cheek and tell her you didn’t mean it.”  
They both looked at him amazed. “You both looked kinda guilty, so I figured you had to open your mouth and insert your foot, Jed. So apologize.”  
“I have already, and I have been forgiven,” Jed smiled at Nan and bent down to kiss her forehead. She blushed and Leo laughed, then coughed. “Ow, shit, that hurt,” he moaned.  
“That’ll teach ya,” Jed laughed. “Why don’t you get some rest Leo. Nan, I assume you are going to stay with him? Good. I am going to ask the staff to make you more comfortable in here. This straight back chair will kill you. I am sending everyone home.”  
“Everyone?”  
“All your children are here Leo; Josh, CJ, Josh, Toby and Sam, plus Donna, Margaret and Charlie. You need rest. They can come by in a day or two. I will fill them in.”  
“Thank you,” Nan said as she stood. Jed kissed her cheek and turned back to Leo who was grinning. “Watch it there, Jed. Keep your lips off my girl.”  
“Then get outta that bed soon and make me, Leo.” He leaned down and gave Leo a kiss on the cheek too. “Sleep.”  
Leo sighed and closed his eyes. “Okay. I don’t have…to be told…twi…”  
“You rest too.”  
Nan nodded and sat back in the hard chair and took Leo’s hand.

Back in the waiting room everyone stood up when the President entered. He walked over to his Senior Staff. “He was awake and joking. Nan is with him, but he is exhausted and sleeping now. Everyone go home. He is going to be okay. You can visit in a day or two. The nurse said he will be here at least three or four days before they release him to go home. No…Toby, no visitors tonight. Come back tomorrow.”  
In minutes the waiting room was empty of people. The Secret Service was still on the job though. Two agents stood outside Leo’s door and four more lined the hall from Leo’s room to the elevator. Four agents also watched the lobby, checking all who entered the elevators. For now, Leo and Nan were safe.


	7. Chapter VII

CHAPTER VII

Warning: Strong sexual situation

 

Toby knocked lightly and opened the door to Leo’s room. During the night he had been moved from the recovery area to a room on med-surg floor. They put him in a private suite at the end of a long hallway that was easily guarded. The room was bright with sunshine and he was startled to see Nan up on Leo’s bed, sitting cross legged between his legs, holding a bowl with what looked like oatmeal in it, hand feeding Leo from a spoon. She was laughing at something with her head back, golden-auburn hair falling from her face, the sun coming in the window shining on her. Toby felt a twitch in his gut and grunted. ‘Stop it.’  
Leo saw him enter the room and smirked at him with a raised eyebrow and a ‘what are ya gonna do’ shrug.  
Toby cleared his throat. Nan turned and smiled at him. “Mr. Ziegler, hi.”  
“Toby,” he stated as he walked up to the bed and touched Leo’s hand briefly. “Wow, you look like shit.”  
“Don’t sugar coat it Toby, tell me how I really look.”  
He grunted. “Well, it’s the truth. Holy cow. All this from a bicycle accident. Go figure.”  
“How are you, Ms. Gray?”  
“Nan,” she said and spooned up another glob of oatmeal for Leo. “I slept a bit last night after they got Leo moved here. They brought that nice recliner over there, so I feel pretty good. I need a shower and a change of clothes, but I am good.”  
“Nan, please,” Leo turned his head at yet another spoonful of oatmeal. “You know I hate this stuff, especially plain. Yuck.”  
“You need to eat. Fuel to heal. Fuel to get better.”  
“Toby, god, help me. Get me outta here. Before I kill her and have to hide the body.”  
Toby actually laughed and Leo joined in. “Sorry, Leo. But I think you are going to have to suffer through this like a man.” Toby took a good look at Leo and grimaced. He really did look like shit. His face all around his eyes and on his cheeks was turning dark blue and purple. His right arm was encased in gauze that showed several spots where he was bleeding through the bandages, his right shoulder was padded and his upper arm was ace bandaged to his chest. Leo leaned into it, his head listing to the right, favoring it. He was slightly elevated in the bed and his left leg was elevated on pillows and his hip was heavily bandaged and padded with gauze.  
“So, really, how are you?”  
Leo’s smile faded and he leaned back and moaned. “Honestly? Sore, everywhere. My groin is throbbing, and not in a good way. My shoulder feels like glass and if the throbbing in my arm doesn’t stop soon I am going to scream. And Nan insists on feeding me the nutritional equivalent of wall paper paste.”  
Toby chuckled along with Nan. He liked her already and it looked like she was good for Leo. “Well, it looks like you are in good hands here. I gotta get back.”  
“We need to do a conference call this afternoon, senior staff. We cannot let this make it look like we are weak at the moment. I want to keep on Haffley, we keep pushing, do NOT let…” “Leo. It’s okay.”  
“No Toby. This afternoon. I mean it.”  
“Okay. See ya later. Nan, get some rest.”  
“Thanks Toby.”

Leo fell asleep shortly after Toby left and Nan went into the hall to talk to Lewis who was standing guard outside the door. “Lewis. How are you?”  
“Fine, Ms. Gray. How are you doing?”  
“Well, Lewis, I could use a shower and a change of clothes. Is it possible for me to go to the apartment and do that? I want to bring some things for Leo too.”  
“When would you like to leave?”  
“As soon as possible. He is sleeping now. They gave him a pain shot, so he is likely to be out for hours.”  
“Yes ma’am. I will arrange it now. Within the next 30 minutes?”  
“That’s good Lewis. Thank you.”  
“Ma’am.”

After a thirty-minute shower Nan felt almost human again. She didn’t bother with any make up, just dried her hair and pulled it up into a short pony tail and dressed in flip flops, soft worn pale blue chinos and an MIT t-shirt. She grabbed the tote that she used to carry clothes back and forth from her house and Leo’s apartment, and stuffed in another shirt and underwear for herself. She went into Leo’s room and grabbed a few pair of boxers, a pair of his pajama pants, a few t-shirts and some crew socks. Then she grabbed a crossword puzzle book from the coffee table, his glasses and the second volume of the Churchill book he had been reading.  
She opened the front door where Laura Miles was waiting for her. “All set.” Laura muttered into her wrist, “Babel on the way to GW.” She led the way as the rest of the detail joined them in the lobby and then moved as a until to the two black Suburban’s on the curb. 

 

When Nan arrived back at Leo’s room she opened the door and found the place crowded with people. She recognized Josh and CJ and Sam right off, and Donna and Margaret too. The young black man, she remembered, was Charlie and there were a women and a man she did not know. Extra chairs had been brought in and were all occupied by the women. Josh was spread out in her recliner, Charlie leaned against the wall and CJ sat at the foot of Leo’s bed.  
“Hi Nan. How are you?” CJ called out as Leo mouthed a silent hi to Nan and rolled his eyes. “I think you know everyone here except the orange head over there. His name is Danny Concanon and he is a reporter, but is here as a friend and the young lady is Zoe Bartlet, the President’s youngest.”  
“Hi Nan. I am so happy for you and Uncle Leo,” she said as she bounced up and wrapped Nan in a hug. Leo beamed at them both and Nan grinned.  
Danny came over and held out his hand to Nan. “Hi Nan. Congrats to you and Leo. I am happy for you both.”  
Nan looked at CJ with a worried frown. “Just how many people know about us now? I really was hoping this would be kept low key and out of the press for a while yet. Leo?”  
He held out his left hand for her and she worked her way through the maze of chairs to his side. She leaned down to kiss his cheek, but Leo turned his head and captured her lips with his. He grabbed her hand with his and pulled her down onto the edge of the bed. Nan moaned softly and leaned into the kiss, opening her mouth to him, accepting the gentle intrusion of his tongue.  
“Jeez, get a room,” Josh called from his recliner and everyone laughed. “We have one,” Leo scolded, but it seems to be occupied.”  
Leo looked about at everyone in the room. “She is right. This has to remain out of the press for a while longer.”  
“Leo, can I ask why you feel the need to keep your relationship a secret? Honestly, I think it would be a great story for the administration. You are two consenting adults, single, no age issues, no party issues, no job issues. What is the problem? Not that I am asking for an exclusive or anything. I am just wondering,” Danny assured Leo.  
CJ spoke up before Leo could answer. “I think I know. I am sorry Nan, but I did a little research after we left the hospital the day of the accident. Your name kept creeping back into my thoughts and I knew there was something I had read or known or learned. It was not recent, but it kept bugging me. I found it almost immediately.” She looked at Nan and then Leo and back to Nan, silently asking if she should continue. Nan hung her head and Leo grasped her hand again. He whispered something to her no one heard and she nodded her head. Then she squeezed his hand and lifted her head and looked at each person in the room with her head held high and a grim smile on her lips.  
“Go ahead CJ.”  
CJ nodded and stood up from the bed and faced the room. “I found out that Nan was involved in a situation seven years ago that took place in Iran…”  
Danny suddenly gasped and his eyes flew to Nan. He knew. She flinched as if he had hit her and Leo wrapped his arm around her waist. She looked at CJ and urged her to continue.  
“Seven years ago, Nan was sent to Iran with a team to extract some documents that could positively confirm a specific act of Iranian terrorism. The documents needed expert translation. It had to be impeccable. That’s why Nan was sent; she is an expert. When they got the documents they were on their way to …was it Turkey? when the small convoy was attacked. Everyone was killed but Nan and three soldiers, they were captured, the rest of the team killed. Eventually the three soldiers were killed.  
CJ took a deep breath. “Nan was held by this terrorist cell for 21 days.” CJ stopped, looking at Nan. Nan sat up next to Leo, his arm still around her waist. She hugged her arms to her chest and began to speak, staring down at the bed.  
“I was held in this cave at first and then moved to a building on the edge of the village of Sojas. I was gagged and my arms were tied behind my back at all times. I was also blind folded.” Her hands were shaking and she licked her dry lips. Leo’s hand stroked her side. “I was…used. I was ra…raped multiple times. They beat me but mostly used me…  
“I was rescued by a Navy SEAL team. From the time they burst into the room and shot and killed the men holding me until I realized I was in Bethesda, I remember nothing. My memories of the time I was…held, are fragmented. Mostly I don’t remember details, just terror and fear. I have flashbacks and nightmares. Still. I am still in therapy.” She turned to look at Leo for a moment, then looked back down at the bed again. “Leo is in therapy getting help for his addictions and PTSD and I am getting help for MY addictions and PTSD. We see a couple’s therapist who specializes in addiction and PTSD and in helping people when one or both of them have these issues.”  
“The reason I need this to be quiet is I when I returned from Iran, when the news hit about what happened, it was awful. They wanted details I didn’t remember, details buried in my subconscious that were tearing me apart. I was hounded by reporters. They demanded to know all that had happened. They wanted all the disgusting, sordid details. I was accused of things that were disgusting. The details of my surgeries were sought out. It was a circus and I was the main act. I developed a bad pill problem that resulted in me falling down my stairs and hallucinating until I was found.  
“When the press finds out about me and Leo and they find out who I am, I fear it will again be a media circus. I don’t know how I will handle that. Leo and me, two addicts…yes, I am an addict, he is an addict, two people plagued by PTSD, two people who only want to be together, to fall in love…” Nan stopped. The room was as silent as a tomb. Donna and Margaret were silently crying, Josh’ mouth hung open and Toby vibrated with rage. Everyone else was just struck dumb.  
“I just wanted more time. We need more time. We are both…healing, learning to live with our pasts, beginning to see a future ahead of us that we neither thought we could ever have. I don’t want our lives played out in the media.”  
Several pairs of eyes in the room turned to look at Danny. He stood up and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Okay. I am going to leave now but Nan, Leo. Nothing said in this room will ever come from me. I swear. Personally, I would never stoop that low, especially knowing Leo as I do. I don’t want to hear any more, now. Not in this way. Leo, get better. Nan, take care of him.” Danny left the room before anyone could say anything to him.  
Toby spoke first. “I think we should give them some alone time. Let’s go. We have work to do.” Donna and Margaret got up to leave and they each reached over and rubbed Leo’s foot and smiled at Nan. Charlie dipped his head and sighed while Zoe went to the side of the bed and hugged Nan and leaned over her to kiss Leo’s cheek. They left together. CJ leaned over and her height gave her an advantage, she hugged them both and kissed Leo and then Nan on the forehead. Josh climbed out of the recliner and ambled over to the bed. He just gave them both his goofy Josh smile and tipped his head. “See ya later.” Toby stood at the foot of the bed rocking on his heels, his hands deep in his pockets. The anger on his face made Nan nervous, but Leo seemed to accept it. Then Toby just nodded and left.  
Nan curled into Leo’s side. He felt her trembling and the soft shake of her shoulders as she cried. Tears filled his own eyes as he yearned to take away all her pain. He wanted to hold her and protect her but he feared he couldn’t protect her any more than he could protect himself from the pain that was sure to plague them. 

 

It was a Sunday, one week after the biking accident. Leo woke up in his own bed. The room was sunlit even though the window was north facing and he could he hear music coming from the living room. He snuggled down into the down covered mattress and pulled the comforter up to his neck with his good arm. He turned his head toward the door and waited. He was rewarded a few minutes later when Nan tip toed in and peeked around the doorway. She smiled when she saw he was awake and waiting for her. She went around the foot of the bed to the left side and climbed into the middle where Leo lay. She laid her head and on his good shoulder and wrapped her arm around his waist.  
“Crawl under the covers with me.”  
“Oh, I think not mister. You are still on complete bed rest. If I get under there with you, god knows what will happen,” she teased. “I promise to be good,” Leo said as he rubbed her back.  
“You promised last night and look what happened.”  
“That was entirely your fault, my dear,” Leo groaned as he moved his hand down to her waist, dipping his fingers just under the elastic of her sweatpants. You zigged when you should have zagged.”  
Nan wiggled away from him and moved his arm from around her. “Whatever, Leo. You could have really hurt your shoulder, and you needed meds after that to get the pain back under control. So,” she said as she stood up next to the bed and smoothed the comforter back around his hips, “Relax and I will bring you coffee and the paper.”  
He growled under his breath and wriggled under the weight of the bed linens, trying to get comfortable, despite the erection that was driving him nuts. “You are an evil, wicked woman.”  
Nan burst out laughing and headed for the bedroom door. “Yes, yes I am. And don’t you forget it.”  
She came back in a few minutes later carrying an oak bed tray with a huge mug of steaming coffee, tomato juice, toast, cut up melon and a stack of newspapers. Leo groaned when he saw the table. “Invalid, much? I can make it to the living room ya know.”  
“I know, and the doctor also said you need to keep the hip straight, not bent sitting on the couch.”  
“Aw, c’mon. I can do that on the…”  
“Shut up, McGarry. Remember I am evil and wicked. Ya don’t want to push evil.”  
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he grumbled as she placed the tray over his lap and dropped the stack of papers on the bed. She went around the bed to the left side, reached over and pulled his leg straight.  
“God, you are so going to pay for this woman. If it’s the last thing I do…”  
“I have a healthy bank account, McGarry. Bring it on,” she glared with her hands on her hips.  
Leo’s mouth twitched into his trademark smirky grin. “Dear lord, you are one sexy evil woman,” he breathed.  
“I know.” Nan left the room with a seductive smile.

Nan was in the midst of household chores when she heard the front door open. She stuck her head into the living room and saw Lewis coming in. He saw her and took a few more steps into the room. “You have a visitor. Can I send her in?”  
Nan tried to think who it could be, then shrugged. Send them back here okay? Laundry room. Don’t bother Leo.” She heard Lewis giving directions as she pulled wet sheets from the washer and stuffed them in the dryer. She threw in a softener sheet and started the dryer. She pulled clothes from the basket at her feet, filled the washer, poured in the cap of detergent and started it. She was startled when she turned around and ran into the slender chest of CJ. She stepped back and looked up at her. CJ had a grin on her face as she held Nan’s arm to steady her. “Sorry about that.”  
Nan laughed. “Oh, no, that’s okay. No worry. So, why are you here CJ? It is the middle of the day.”  
“I took a long lunch. It’s Friday. Take out the trash day and it is a slow day. So I thought I could get away and see how you both are doing.”  
“Well, welcome then. Let’s, uh, go back out to the living room. “CJ turned around and went back down the short hall to the living room followed by Nan.  
“Have a seat, CJ,” Nan waved her hand at the sofa. Can I get you some coffee, tea, soft drink?”  
“Coffee, if you have it made.”  
“With Leo around you always have coffee ready,” Nan laughed from the kitchen. What do you take in it, CJ?”  
“Just some cream and sugar is fine.”  
Nan came back out with two mugs and sat them on the coffee table. She sat in the big club chair to the right of the sofa while CJ settled into the corner of the sofa. “Hmm, nice sofa. Nice room. So this is Leo’s place. We didn’t even know he had moved out of his hotel. This is really nice. Very tastefully decorated too.”  
Nan smiled settling into her chair with her legs curled under her, sipping her coffee. “I love this place. The décor? That’s all Leo. I have done nothing here, except move in,” she laughed.  
“Wow, Leo has good taste. Good coffee too,” CJ said after taking a healthy sip.  
“So, Nan, how is he doing?”  
“Good. He is chomping at the bit about the rest and relaxation. Wants to get back to work. But it’s mostly bark, and not a lot of bite. He hurts, a lot. His shoulder is really giving him a lot of grief, and then he exacerbated that last night. And his groin, the incision, is still pretty painful.”  
“What did he do to hurt his shoulder?”  
Nan blushed and looked down at her coffee cup. CJ grinned. “Nan…?”  
“Oh. Nothing really, CJ. Well, darn, Mr. Frisky decided to get…well…frisky, and he leaned too hard on his shoulder while grabbing for me and really caused the pain to flare up.”  
CJ’s shoulders shook while she tried not to laugh out loud. “Mr. Frisky?”  
Nan was laughing too trying not to spill her coffee. “Yeah, well…”  
“Yeah,” CJ paused. You know that you are the best thing that has happened to him in a really long time?”  
Nan looked at CJ. “How do you know that? I don’t know that. At least I am not sure of it, yet. I, we, have a lot of baggage we are working through CJ. It has not been a walk in the park. This has been one of the hardest things I have ever done”  
“Hard things are worth it. Look at the prize at the end, Nan. You two, together, the world at your feet.”  
“Wow, CJ, you are a poet.” Nan smirked.  
CJ grinned back. “I know, we know, you are good for him. The change in him has been amazing, once we all realized what we were seeing. I knew something had changed for him, but not one of us ever considered he had fallen in love.”  
“Sometimes I wonder if we should have ever started this. Sometimes it feels like it takes too much effort, too much of your soul, too much pain, to keep going. Part of that is what comes from being an addict, CJ. We look for reasons to fall back on the drugs, or in Leo’s case the alcohol. We want the drugs or the booze, because we are addicts. We need a reason to let go and crawl back into the oblivion.” Nan sighed. But then I look at him when he laughs, when he smiles, when he looks at me with that expression on his face, that smoldering in his eyes, when he tells me he loves me and I know he does because he just doesn’t say it, he whispers it to my soul. And I know I would crawl through fire to be with him.” Nan set down her coffee and rubbed the tears from her eyes with a shudder.  
CJ set down her coffee and reached over to Nan and put her arms around her shoulders. They sat quietly for a few minutes, then both sat back, wiped their eyes, smiled and each realized in the other a budding friendship.  
“Okay then. Hey. Hungry? I have all the making for a salad, prepped and ready to go.”  
“That sounds good. I will take you up on that.”  
They went into the kitchen and put together the two salads. Nan whipped up a fresh Italian dressing and poured some iced tea. She showed CJ into the sun room and they ate on the sofa with the doors open. After they cleaned up Nan asked CJ, “Do you want to check on Leo. He has been pretty quiet this last hour and a half.”  
“That is why I came by in the first place,” CJ laughed.  
CJ followed Nan through the living room into the foyer and down the hall to Leo’s room. Nan stopped in the doorway and smiled, holding her hand to her heart. She looked back at CJ who was peering over her head into the room and smiling too. Leo was sound asleep, his head back on the pillows, his left arm out to his side, gently snoring. Nan crept into the room and lifted the tray table from the bed, noting that Leo had only drank the coffee and juice and left the food behind. She handed it to CJ and gathered the papers from the bed and put them on the bench at the foot of the bed. She pulled the covers up over Leo’s chest to his neck and lightly kissed his cheek.  
In the foyer she took the tray from CJ. “I know you have to get back. Can you come back later? Have dinner with us.”  
“I will. That sounds great.” CJ leaned in and kissed her cheek. “Hang in there,” and she left.

 

When CJ arrived back at Leo and Nan’s it was just past 7:00 pm. When the evening agent Goodson opened the door Nan was in the foyer. “Hi CJ. Who else did you get to come?” She peered into the hallway around Goodson’s shoulder.  
“Toby, Josh and Sam, Donna, Margaret and Mallory and Zoey.”  
Nan stepped around Goodson and put her arms around Mallory. “Mallory. When did you get in? We thought it was going to be next week?”  
Mallory hugged her back and kissed her cheek. “I pushed up my flight and got in a few hours ago. I went to the west wing to speak to Margaret and I saw CJ and she just grabbed me and said you were all coming here. Dad doesn’t know?”  
“I just told him CJ was going to drop by. I wanted to surprise him. He is just going bonkers here, confined to bed. He needs a room full of people to make him stop feeling sorry for himself. Come on in.”  
As she led them into the living room they all ooohhhh’d at the view of the night lights beyond the full wall of windows. “Oh my gosh, what a beautiful place,” Donna gushed. Everyone took in the room, the breakfast bar with four stools, the kitchen past that. The huge inviting sofa and chairs.  
“Everyone grab a seat, except the one on the left. That’s for Leo.” Donna, Margaret, Josh and Sam all spread out on the sofa. Toby took the club chair to the right of the sofa and Zoe sat on the floor in front of the sofa, sliding her legs under the massive coffee table. “Wow. You could sleep on this thing, it’s so big.” Mallory followed Nan into the kitchen and gave her another hug. “Are you okay?”  
“I am Mal. I am okay. And your dad is doing really well, if I don’t kill him before he gets back to work.”  
“Being difficult, is he?”  
Nan just looked at her from under scowling eyebrows. Mallory grunted in sympathy. “Okay, Mal. Help me here.” Nan went into the fridge and pulled out six beers and a cola. “Take those out and see if we need any substitutions.” I’ll bring chips.”  
Nan brought out two huge bowls, one with chips and the other with pretzels. Everyone but Toby was fine with beer and Zoe with her Coke. Toby eyed the beer and held it out to Mallory. “Got any bourbon?” Mallory shoved the beer back at him. “Remember where you are Toby? Be thankful you got a beer.”  
“Fine,” he mumbled and took a swig of beer. They all sat, Mallory squeezing onto the sofa between Donna and Margaret., and chatted for a few minutes when Nancy McNally walked into the living room from the foyer. “Oh, wow. Hi all,” she said at the ‘just as surprised to see her there’ group. “Had to give Leo a security briefing and get his thoughts on a few things.”  
Nan had hopped down from the bar stool she had perched on and went over to Nancy. “Wanna stay? I am going to order from Paradiso later.”  
“Oh, I wish I could. But I have to get back to State. I will come by this weekend though.” She caught Nan up in a big hug and smiling said, “hang in there girlfriend. He is doing okay.” Nan walked her to the foyer and saw her out.  
“I still can’t get over Nancy McNally being anybody’s best friend,” Josh quipped. He was actually scared to death of her, but would never admit it to anyone, ever, no way.  
Nan gave him an exasperated look. “Well then, Josh, that stupid remark means you put down your beer and come help me.” He got up with a sheepish shrug of his shoulders. Donna hit him in the leg. “Go. Help.”  
Josh followed Nan into Leo’s bedroom, where he pulled up short. Nan breezed in and kissed his cheek. “Okay, Leo. We have company this evening. For dinner and general chat and relax,” she busied herself pulling back the covers and helping Leo to sit. “Josh, come over here and grab those sweat pants on the chair. He picked up the pants and walked over. “Help me get them on his legs.”  
Leo smirked at Josh who was looking everywhere in the room but at Leo’s exposed legs and boxer shorts. He reached out, feeling for Leo’s legs, found his knee and jumped.  
“Oh good lord, Josh. I am not naked.”  
“Well you almost are…” Josh whined.  
“Grow up,” Leo growled at Josh and he looked at Leo, then down to his legs.  
“Josh help me swing him around,” Nan said as they each grabbed a leg and turned Leo so his legs bent over the side of the bed. Josh knelt and slipped the sweatpants over his feet. “Okay, Josh, stand him up, but watch the right shoulder.”  
Josh stood before Leo and grabbed him by the waist and pulled him upright. Leo grabbed his shoulder with his good arm while Nan pulled the pants up his legs. He hissed in pain when the pants slid over his groin. “You okay, Leo,” Josh asked in alarm.  
“I…I’m okay.”  
Nan tied the string on the pants and pulled Leo’s shirt down.  
“Okay, Josh, walk him into the living room.”  
Leo put his left arm over Josh’s shoulder when he moved to his side. “Josh, I am gonna put all my weight on you, okay. Keep me off of this leg as much as you can. And go slow, for god’s sake.”  
They started a slow, painful walk to the living room while Nan collected the bed pillows and the knitted throw from the bench at the foot of the bed. She followed behind them with her hand on Leo’s right hip, ready to help Josh if he needed it. When the they got to the foyer and turned into the living room conversation stopped. Sam and Toby jumped to their feet to help.  
“Nah. It’s okay. I got him,” Josh said as he concentrated on moving slowly and holding Leo. Nan went over to the empty chair and tucked two pillows against the back and dropped the rest on the floor. “Over here Josh.”  
Josh got Leo around the coffee table and before the chair, turned him and then slowly lowered him into the chair. Leo fell back against the pillow breathing heavily. He scrunched his face in pain as he wiggled to get comfortable. Nan picked up the pillows from the floor. “Josh, carefully life his legs while I put the pillows on the table.” Josh lifted, Nan tucked the pillows under his legs and Leo let out a big groan.  
Josh sat back on the couch next to Leo and patted his arm. Leo reached out and ruffled Josh’ hair. “Thanks, kid.” Josh beamed, grabbed his beer and sat back while everyone started talking and asking Leo how he was.

Two more bowls of snacks, four pizzas and all the beer later, the conversation had slowed, gotten quieter and more intimate as Margaret, Donna and Mallory chatted together, Josh, Sam and Toby were arguing and Zoey sat with Nan and Leo. A few hours later Donna and Margaret stood up and said they were calling it a night. “Mallory?”  
“I am going to stay the night, if it’s okay Nan?”  
“We love to have you stay, Mal. You never have to ask.” That settled Josh, Sam and Josh decided to head down to DuPont circle and find a drinking establishment. Zoe’s detail would return her to the White House. Leo had fallen asleep and was snoring in the chair.  
“Nan, we need to get him to bed,” Josh asked?  
“Don’t worry about it. When it’s time, I can get Goodson. He can carry Leo to bed. Or Mal is here to help me. We will be fine. Have a good night,” Nan said as she kissed Josh and then all her and Leo’s friends’ goodnight. “Thanks for coming. He really needed that.”  
Later, after Mallory had gone to bed, and Goodson had picked up Leo like a baby and deposited him in bed, Nan showered, put on a t-shirt and panties and then crawled under the covers. She slid up next to Leo and snuggled up close. She leaned in and kissed his neck. He moaned low in his sleep but didn’t wake. Nan closed her eyes and it was not long before she finally slept.

 

“Mr. McGarry. I am not going to argue with you. I am the one who decides when you go back and under what conditions. There is no bargain to be reached here. I decide. You do as I say. Clear?”  
Leo glared at the orthopedic doctor who was evaluating him. He sat on the exam table as the doctor slowly manipulated his shoulder assessing the range of motion. His shirt was off and the doctor was watching as well as feeling his shoulder as he moved his arm around.  
“Damn,” Leo gasped during one particular motion. The doctor moved his back into a neutral position and Leo sighed when the pain stopped.  
“I am scheduling eight weeks of physical therapy to start on Monday. If you are cleared by the vascular doctor you can go back to work next Monday, mornings only. Four to five hours. Therapy in the afternoon, then home to rest. The therapy is going to kick your butt. Understand? You are only two weeks out from these injuries. Give yourself some time.”  
“Yes,” Leo ground out the word and continued to glare at the doctor.  
“Look, if you do not give this shoulder time to heal properly, and do the required therapy, you are going to have problems down the line. Do it now, do it right and can guarantee a good outcome for the long term.  
“Right. Okay,” Leo conceded, only because he knew that he would have Nan and Jed on his back if he didn’t. They had much more power to make his life hell than the doctor did.  
“Good. Get your shirt back on but stay here. Dr. Nguyen will be here in a few minutes. He is going to remove those staples from your groin, check your arm and give you the same talk I just have.”  
“Great. Thanks.” The nurse in the room helped Leo put his sweatshirt back on. He had to wear button shirts or loose pullovers that could be pulled up his right arm and then stretched over his head. She then helped him to lie back and pulled his sweatpants down and off his legs and covered him with a sheet. “The doctor will be here soon,” she said as she left him alone in the room.”  
Leo heard the door open and turned his head. Nan slipped into the room and came over to Leo. “The nurse said I could come in until the doctor came.” She pulled the rolling stool over and sat next to the table. She leaned over and gave him a kiss. He kissed her back and groaned.  
“I just wanna get out of here and go home. I need to kiss you for a couple of hours.” He waggled his eyebrows at her and got the giggle he was trolling for. Nan smiled at him and traced her finger down his cheek and rubbed it over his lips. “Soon,” she promised.  
Dr. Nguyen breezed into the room with the nurse at his heels. She went to the other side of the room and wheeled a covered tray back with her. The doctor stepped up to the table.  
“Mr. McGarry. How are you today?”  
“Just fine.”  
“Good. We are going to remove those staples today. I bet it has been a long two weeks.”  
“Yeah.” Leo was not in the mood for breezy conversation right now.  
The doctor looked at Nan. “Not squeamish are you?”  
Nan laughed and shook her head. “No. I am okay.” She stood up and put her hand on Leo’s right leg, letting the doctor know she was not leaving.  
“Good.” He pulled back the sheet and then motioned to the nurse. “We have to lower these boxers, sir. Lift your hips,” the doctor said as the nurse pulled the boxers down to his thigh. Leo blushed as the doctor brushed his penis to the middle and tucked the sheet over him, exposing the incision in his groin. “Okay, this device we use to remove the staples may pinch a bit of skin. Try not to jump.”  
Leo winced when the cold metal touched his skin, and again when he felt the tug as the staple was removed. His incision was five inches long and the staples had been placed about every quarter inch so it took a few minutes to remove the twenty staples. The doctor then inspected the incision. “Looks good. This healed well.”  
He moved up toward Leo’s head and looked down at him. “Now. You still do have to take it easy. Another three to four weeks before you begin any exercise. No running, no stairs, no lifting. The internal repair of the artery went very well, and healing should be right on target. But, you need to be aware that vigorous activity could be a problem. At six weeks you should be able to resume light exercise, stairs, etc. I would forego biking for three months. Now these are my recommendation for the vascular repair. Your ortho guy will have other guidelines. Okay?”  
Leo nodded. “Good. Now let’s look at the arm.” The nurse removed the dressings from Leo’s arm and the doctor carefully moved his arm out onto the exam table extension. “Can you handle that for a few minutes?”  
“Not for long. That hurts my shoulder.”  
“Okay, this won’t take long. This looks good. I am going to snip these sutures out. Same as the groin, take it easy. You have a lot of internal sutures in here from the tendon repair. Don’t do anything crazy. Three to four weeks more and you should be clear to resume some exercise. Therapy for the arm and to help with function compromised by the tendon injury will done concurrently with your shoulder therapy.”  
“Any questions?”  
Leo looked at Nan and blushed. “Uh, what about…can I... we…I mean is it okay to…ya know…”  
“Sex?”  
Leo blushed again. “Yeah.”  
“Again, take it easy. There should be no reason not to.” He looked at Nan. “You should not be on top, yet. Too much weight on the groin area. And with your shoulder you probably won’t be able to put any weight on it. I guess you will have to get creative.” Now Leo and Nan blushed. “Just take it slow.”  
“Yeah. Easy for you to say,” Leo groused under his breath and this time the nurse blushed.  
The doctor finished taking out the sutures, patted Leo on the shoulder, nodded to Nan and then left. The nurse washed down both Leo’s groin and arm with an antiseptic solution and then lightly bandaged both. She pulled up his boxers, removed the sheet and Nan helped to get his sweatpants back on. They helped him sit up and then slide down off the table.  
“Wait here a minute. I will bring back your next appointment time and some post suture removal wound care instructions.”  
Ten minutes later they were on their way out. Lewis walked at Leo’s left side holding his arm to help steady him. Nan was on his right. Two agents lead the way and three more trailed behind. They took the elevator to the ground floor and walked slowly across the lobby, the entourage eliciting curious glances from visitors and staff alike.  
They exited through the main lobby doors to the street where three black Suburban’s sat on the curb. Cruze opened the back passenger door on the middle car. Leo looked at Cruze with a smirk on his face. He knew they were going to have to lift him into the car. At the best of times he had to climb into the damn things. Being a shorter guy had its disadvantages. Cruze smirked back and with the help of another agent they lifted him into the back seat like he weighed nothing. Nan climbed in over him and slipped into the back seat. She knew Lewis had to sit next to Leo. Her agent, Laura Miles, slid into the back seat with her. Cruze went to the driver’s seat and another agent rode shot gun.  
Nan reached up and squeezed his shoulder from behind. “Are you tired Leo?”  
He looked back at her. “A little. Why?”  
“Well, I did ask the first doctor, when he came out of the room before I came in, if it was okay for you to go on a small trip. As long as you promise to sit and behave, you wanna go pay the President a visit?”  
Leo smiled his megawatt ‘you bet your ass’ smile. “Yeah. That would be great.”  
“Lewis,” Nan asked?  
“Let me check in.” He spoke quietly into his sleeve and waited a few minutes for the response. “Okay. We are a go. Irish and Babel on route to home base. ETA five minutes.” 

“Mr. President? Your 1:00 with the Vice President has been cancelled,” Charlie said as he stepped into the Oval office. “Mrs. Landingham asked me to tell you. She is substituting another meeting. He will arrive in a minute or two.”  
“OK Charlie. Good. I didn’t want to meet with him today anyway. Not in a mood for him.”  
“Yes sir,” Charlie smiled.

The President lifted his head from his briefing book when he heard a commotion in the outer office. People were talking with raised voices, he heard a welcome home and a ‘so good to see you’, before his door opened and he saw Leo on Charlies arm slowly walking into the Oval followed by the senior staff and assistants. He jumped to his feet and ran over to help.  
“Hang on there, Mr. President. Charlie has me,” Leo looked at Charlie who nodded with a serious, “Yes sir. Mr. McGarry. I got you.” Charlie held onto Leo as he led him around the to the front of first sofa and then held his hands as he sat down.  
“Thank you, Charlie.”  
The President moved to the sofa and sat next to Leo. He put his hand on his shoulder and almost hugged him, but he stopped. Time for that later. “Leo. How are you?”  
While Leo and the President were talking, CJ noticed Nan standing in the doorway looking in. She walked up to Nan noting the uncertain look on her face. “Never been in the Oval before, have you?” She took Nan’s arm and walked her in.  
“No…it’s…”  
“…something, isn’t it.”  
“Yeah,” Nan looked at CJ. “I know what Leo does. Who he is in this administration. But just now, being here, seeing him here, really makes it real. I know I work in government and have for years, but I am removed from this seat of power. I mean, the Leo that I know loves to cuddle on the sofa in the evening, whips up amazing breakfasts, is so sexy in the morning reading the papers in his pajama’s with his glasses on the end of his nose. I am not sure I know this Leo, the powerful Leo. Kinda scary, in a way.”  
CJ reached out and hugged Nan. She chuckled. “Nan, he is still Leo. But I do have to tell you, he can be a scary man. He has been known to figuratively behead and/or dismember people who he feels need it. Leo is a demanding boss, but we also all know he would take a bullet for any one of us, and us for him.”  
Nan shuddered. “I can’t say I appreciate that analogy, CJ, but I understand. Thank you.”  
“Nan, come over here,” the President shouted from the sofa. He pulled her down to sit beside him and gave her a huge hug. Nan turned deep red and rolled her eyes at Leo over the Presidents shoulder. “How are you? Has it been awful dealing with this cranky old man?”  
“No sir,” Nan laughed. He is a very good patient. All I have to do is threaten and he toes the line.”  
“She with holds food from me Mr. President and even worse,” Leo whispered loudly, so all could hear, to the President.  
“And what could be worse than no food, Leo?”  
Leo’s mouth twitched as he tried not to smile and again in a loud whisper said, “Kisses. She withholds kisses, Mr. President. Now what kind of woman would deny a wounded man kisses.” Everyone in the room was laughing as Nan picked up a pillow from the sofa and lobbed it at Leo. He caught it and slipped it under his right elbow.  
Nan noticed and immediately became concerned. “Leo?”  
He shook his head. “Shoulder is just a little sore. I probably should put the sling back on.” Another pillow was handed over and Leo rested his forearm on it.  
Adopting a more serious tone, the President asked, “So when do you see the doctor? Do you know when you might be released to come back?”  
“We just came from GW. I saw the vascular surgeon and the Orthopedic guy. They remove the staples in my groin.” Leo grinned when Toby groaned in sympathy. “Also,” he pulled up his shirt sleeve, “they took out these sutures too.”  
“They said I could return to work next Monday. But only mornings. Four to five hours. I will have scheduled physical therapy for my shoulder and my arm. I still have almost no function in my ring and fifth finger.”  
“From the injury to the tendon,” the President asked?  
“Yeah. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but I am right handed and it is making some things a little difficult to do. It should improve over time.”  
“Well that is great news, Leo. We can’t wait for you to be back. Nan? He looks a little tired. Take him home.”  
“Yes sir. I think that is a good idea,” she looked at Leo who did not look happy. She shook her head with a smile. He smirked back. “Okay. I am kinda tired.”  
Charlie came back in and helped Leo to stand and stood behind him, supporting him with a hand on his back while everyone stepped over to say goodbye and give him a hug. Charlie then walked Leo back onto the portico and to the waiting Suburban. Charlie waved goodbye and went back to work.

The trip home was quick and Leo was settled on the sofa with the papers and the TV remote. Nan made coffee and poured them each a mug and settled on the sofa with Leo’s legs in her lap. She moaned when she swallowed her first gulp of coffee. “Oh, god, I needed that.”  
“Wow, I wish I could make you moan like that,” Leo grumbled with a smirk.  
“Oh you do McGarry, you do.”  
Leo reached out and took her hand. “The doctor did give us the all clear. As long as we were creative. He couldn’t know we have not…uh, had intercourse, yet, but we can certainly get creative in other ways,” he waggled his eyebrows at her.  
“Are you okay,” he asked when he only got a wan smile from her instead of the expected response of a laugh and a slap on the shoulder. She leaned forward and put her mug on the table and shifted so she was facing Leo. She took his mug and put it next to hers and took both of his hands in hers.  
She looked down at their hands for a moment then looked into Leo’s eyes.  
“Nan…what?”  
“No, Leo, it’s nothing bad,” she reassured him. He breathed a sigh of relief. “It has been six months since we first met. Almost five months now that we have been in this relationship. I know we have made so much progress, I have made progress, I…love you, Leo. I never thought I would say that again in my life. I never thought someone would mean that much to me again. I didn’t think anyone would ever make me feel again, anything but fear and disgust and shame and guilt. The accident has made me realize that life is really too short to let fear run it. I could have lost you. I could have lost you at Rosslyn and never known you. I don’t want to wait anymore, I love you and I want us to be together, I want to love you and I want you to love me…”  
“Nan…”  
“Leo, I love you and I want to be with you, love you, completely. I want you to make love to me, I want you all the way Leo.”  
“Nan, stand up,” she did but looked confused for a second. Then Leo spread his legs and pulled her down to him on the sofa and hugged her to his chest. “God, Nan, I love you, I love you so much, I love being with you, laughing with you, touching you, kissing you…” he tipped her head back and took her mouth with his, opening her lips with his, reaching with his tongue to gently, at first, stroke the roof of her mouth, twist his tongue around hers. They kissed until they had to breathe, both panting, foreheads touching. Leo leaned back to look in her eyes and fell. Fell headlong into the desire he saw there; the love he saw there. He took her mouth passionately, forcefully, not holding back anymore. No gentle touching of lips and careful kisses. He thrust his tongue into her mouth, stroking, probing, reaching deep to touch the smooth flesh of her palate. Sucking her lower lip into his mouth, nipping, stroking and then drew her tongue into him, into his mouth, twisting her tongue with his, until they were shuddering with desire, drawing in ragged breaths. They pulled away, chests heaving and kissed again.  
Leo held her in his arms, holding her to him, pinned, unable to move. This should have frightened her, sent her into a panic attack, but it didn’t. Not this time. This time she wanted more, she pushed her body into Leo’s, wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him to her, thrusting her body into his, trying to get closer, trying to climb inside him, if only she could merge her body with his. Leo tightened his arms, his hands gripping her back then rubbing down her sides and back up to her shoulders, again and again. All the while making love to her mouth, fucking her mouth with his tongue.  
Leo groaned into Nan’s mouth, holding her tightly as never before. He ran his hands down to her buttocks and squeezed her ass, pulling her up against his erection. She thrust her hip into him and he groaned. “Oh god, Nan. I am so sorry,” he pulled away a little. “My groin, the incision…”  
Nan jumped back and straightened his leg, gently laying her hand on his groin. “Can I look?”  
Leo smirked and leered at her. “Sure baby. Pull my pants down. Here let me help,” Leo lifted his hips a bit and Nan pulled the waistband down just to the top of his thigh. “Whoa, slow down lover boy,” Nan laughed as he tried to pull them down further. “Let’s make sure you didn’t hurt anything before we continue this.” Nan ran her hand over the five-inch scar lightly, checking just to be safe. She rested her hand on his hip and could feel the pulse in his groin beneath her fingers. Leo took her hand and placed it on his hardening erection. “This is fine too, baby,” he moaned as he rubbed her hand over his cock.  
Nan smiled as she grabbed the waistband of the pants and pulled them back up to his waist. “Ahhh, c’mon baby, that was cruel.” Leo squirmed on the couch, grabbing himself and pulling on his cock.  
Nan leaned back into him, wrapping her arms around his waist, rubbing his erection with her body. “I think, lover boy, that we should move this somewhere more comfortable and less dangerous. What do you think?”  
“I am having some serious trouble here thinking anything at all baby. Yeah, where…the bedroom. Okay, yes, now. Let’s go,” Leo pushed Nan away and swung his legs onto the floor.  
“Leo, slow down.”  
He took a deep breath. “Okay. Yeah. Sorry, but…good lord, you drive me crazy.” He leaned over and kissed her again, lightly, gently. Nan sighed against his lips and jumped when a hard knock at the apartment door announced Lewis’ appearance in the foyer. He took in Nan and Leo on the sofa and turned his head away. “Sorry, sir, ma’am. Three-hour sweep, done in a minute,” Lewis said as he went back into the foyer and into Leo’s bedroom, then into the dining room and second bedroom. He pointedly did not look at them as he went through the living room and into the sunroom and laundry. “All clear,” he said into his wrist as he glanced at Leo and grinned. “You have three hours…until the next sweep,” he told Leo, knowing full well that Leo knew that.

Leo stood up and held out his hand to Nan. They walked slowly to the bedroom arm in arm, hips bumping lightly. Just inside the door to his room, Leo stopped and turned to Nan, wrapping his arms around her tightly, brushing his lips over hers, reaching down to grasp her hips and pull her into him, his hands moved to her ass, grasping, pulling her into his now semi hard erection.  
She moaned when he let her go and went into the walk in closet. He came back out holding a white athletic sock from the hamper and went back into the foyer. He opened the front door, slipped the sock on the doorknob and slammed the door. He could hear Lewis’ bark of laughter out in the hall and he grinned. Nan was watching from the hall. “You are impossible.”  
“Just making sure we are not interrupted, baby,” he growled as he grabbed her and walked her into the bedroom. He stopped a few feet from the bed and held her out at arm’s length. He looked down at her feet and slowly caressed her with his eyes, up her thighs to her trim waist, her breasts beneath the snug t shirt, to her throat, her lips, her eyes. He touched her face, took her face in his hands and leaned in, barely touched her lips, breathed on them, then ran his tongue over her bottom lip. She opened her lips, her mouth to him, again, inviting him in, sucking his tongue in. She reached for him and he held her arms. “No.”  
“Why,” was her strangled cry.  
“Slow down. Let me touch you. I want this to last, I want to cherish this.” She moaned into his mouth again, searching for his tongue with hers, grinding her teeth into his. He broke the kiss and leaned down, held her head, then kissed the spot, just below her ear, that made her gasp. He sucked and licked that spot until she whimpered, then traced his lips down further to kiss the throbbing vein in her neck, and then down to nibble on her collarbone, licking, tracing a path from neck to shoulder and back. Nan’s hands were wound in the fabric of Leo’s sweatshirt, grasping, trying to pull him closer.  
He let go of her head and backed away, unwinding the fabric of his clothing from her hands. He moved his hands to her hips and slid them up her sides under the t-shirt and splayed his hands across her back, pulling her tightly to his chest. He rubbed her back, playing with the outline of her wing bones, his fingers dancing on the flesh, teasing, sensual. Nan’s arms wound around his neck, her fingers tangling into the hair at the base of his head. She tongued his mouth, thrusting as deeply as she could, pushing into his mouth harder. He opened his as much as he could, his jaw straining, urging her on with his tongue.  
He drew back sharply, gasping for air, Nan moaning at the loss of contact. Leo lifted his hands along her sides, then up and over, throwing off her shirt in one smooth movement. He dove into her cleavage, sucking on the rounded tops of her breasts, damning the lacy fabric that kept him from her nipples. She pulled him into her chest, thrusting her breasts into his face. Leo licked, and nibbled, he bit then sucked the soft flesh. He fumbled with the hooks at her back, moaning as he tried to release the bra, then giving up he pulled the straps down her arms and pushed the bra to her waist, capturing an erect nipple in his mouth, flicking his tongue hard over the nub, licking and then sucking it hard into his mouth. He kneaded the other breast, twirling the swollen nipple with his thumb and fore finger.  
Nan’s knees threatened to give way as a bolt of desire screamed down her body from her nipples to her core. She whimpered and grabbed Leo’s head, forcing him onto her breast, demanding his attention. When Leo drew back to take a much needed breath, Nan grabbed the hem of his sweatshirt and pulled him to her. “Take this off, now.” They had to slow down for a moment, and carefully pull the sweatshirt over Leo’s head and then down his injured shoulder and arm.  
“Are you okay,” she asked, worried suddenly?  
“Yes,” he groaned and pulled her naked breasts to his chest. Nan gasped when his wiry chest hair scratched her swollen, sensitive nipples. She rubbed her nipples into his chest, wanting to feel the almost too painful sensation over and over. Leo reached down and cradled her breasts in his hands, lifting the engorged nipples to his mouth. One soft breathy kiss on the left and then the same on the right. Then he licked one nipple hard, flattening the nipple with his tongue and then the other. Then suddenly sucking the nipple as far into his mouth as hard as he could, then the same again. Nan cried out, “God, Leo, my god…HARDER…” and he complied.  
Nan pushed him away and bent her head to his chest. She assaulted his nipples as he had hers. Sucking the tiny buttons of engorged nerve endings, licking, then sucking, then biting hard. “Leo almost fell over when his knees buckled. She grabbed his waist and moved to the other nipple, biting and licking, flicking the flesh with her tongue in hard, rapid bursts of sensation.  
“Nan…dear god…suck me harder. Oh god…” Leo lifted her head and took her mouth again, pulling her hips, crushing his cock into her pubic bone. Thrusting, rubbing through his sweatpants into the layered fabric of her jeans. He needed to feel more of her, he needed to feel her flesh, her skin, her skin on his, sliding over his. They both frantically grasped at the others clothing. Leo pulled her jeans down without undoing the button or zipper while Nan slid her hands into his sweat pants and pushed them down his thighs. Leo went down on one knee, wincing slightly at the pull in his groin. He placed Nan’s hands on his shoulder and he lifted one leg, pulled off the jeans and then lifted the other. He ran his hands up the backs of her calves, to her thighs, held her ass cheeks in his hands and kissed her through her lace panties. He pushed his mouth into her, biting through the cloth, feeling the dampness of her on his tongue.  
Nan helped him stand then bent down to push his sweatpants to the floor. He stepped out of them and kicked them to the side. Nan stood and wrapped her arms around him and pushed her hips against his, his hard cock tenting the fabric of his silk boxers. Nan rubbed herself against the silk, loving the feel of Leo’s hardness beneath the soft, slick cloth. Leo moaned and thrust his hips into her, reaching for her mouth with his, again, swallowing her cries, her moans, caressing the roof of her mouth, sucking her lower lip gently.  
Leo walked them to the bed, mouths and hips never breaking contact. When the backs of her legs hit the mattress, Leo stopped and lowered her to the bed then pushed her onto her back and scooted her back from the edge. He hooked his thumbs in the sides of her panties and slowly dragged them down her hips, her legs and over her feet, the whole time never breaking eye contact with her. He leaned over her, hands on either side of her on the mattress, holding him up as he bent his head to her neck, licking and nibbling his way to her nipples, one then the other so sensitive now that Nan thrashed her head back and forth, arching her hips when he sucked and bit one and then the other. He ran his tongue down her abdomen stopping to push his tongue into her navel, licking, breathing onto it, then down to her left hip. Biting and tonguing the protrusion of her hipbone, running his teeth over her taut flesh. He kissed his way across to the other hip, then down her inner thigh, biting and sucking.  
Leo knelt down on the floor, placed Nan’s feet on the mattress and pushed her legs open wide, exposing her sex, inhaling the sweet and pungent scent of her desire made his breath catch in his chest. He slipped his hands under her ass and lifted her up just enough to make his access to her easier. Leo flattened his tongue over her labia, licking with wide slow strokes, from back to front, one side then the other. He licked slow and hard over the top of her clit, pressing his tongue down, breathing into her, Nan’s moans and whimpers driving him on. He dropped his tongue all the way down to her anus, pushed the tip of his tongue there, firmly, and ran his tongue up, over her, dipping into her vagina and finishing with a hard sweep of his tongue over the hood of her clit. He dipped his head and repeated the motion, over and over, until Nan was wet and swollen and pulsating with need. Then and only then Leo moved his hands from under her ass and use his thumbs to open her up and expose her clit. He twirled his tongue around it, lapping at it and then opened his mouth wide and sucked her as far into his mouth as her could, raking his tongue over her clit, hard, slow, demanding strokes. He pushed two fingers into her hot, wet vagina and Nan plunged into orgasm, wave after shocking wave of fire burning out from her core and down her legs. She grabbed her nipples and pinched them, twisting them, adding to the sensations that tore through her body.  
Leo didn’t stop sucking her until he felt her muscles slacken and the ripples in her vagina lessen and stop. He then softly kissed her folds and clit, her thighs, his breath easing the shuddering of her muscles. Leo climbed on to the bed and lay next to her on his back. His knees, shoulder and groin were all complaining and he needed a break. He held out his hand to Nan and she turned and moved up to his left side and rested her head on his stomach, her leg thrown over his. He ran his fingers through her hair with his left hand and held her left hand with his right. Nan breathed softly, teasing the flesh of his abdomen, pressing her head into his warmth.  
Nan moved up and kissed Leo. A gentle, probing kiss, tasting herself on his tongue. Leo responded deepening the kiss, turning onto his side and drawing her body close to his. Nan reached down between their bodies, inside his boxers and stroked his semi erect penis. Leo groaned softly as she gently slid her hand down the shaft and then up and over the head, rubbing her thumb over the slit, under the head and then stroking back down to his balls. His hips moved, thrusting his cock into her hand, matching the rhythm of her motion. As they kissed, ever more deeply, Leo reached out and stroked her breast, rubbed his thumb over the nipple, then tweaking it between his fingers, pulling on it. That caused Nan to squeeze his cock harder, pull harder, rub harder. Leo groaned into her mouth as his hips thrust harder, her hand stroked faster.  
“Whoa, Nan, god, stop or this is gonna be over.” Leo grabbed her hand and turned onto his side pulling her close, his cock pressed to her navel, he rubbed her back, running his hands down to her buttocks, squeezing the flesh there` he ran his fingers into the cleft of her cheeks and back up the small of her back to her neck. They lay like this for long sensual minutes, stroking flesh, kissing until Nan felt Leo had calmed.  
She pushed him onto his back and she moved down between his legs. She grabbed the waistband of his boxers and dragged them down exposing his cock, then balls, and down his thighs. He lifted his right leg and she slipped the boxers over his foot and then over the left leg gently. She ran her hands, light as feathers, over the exposed skin of his hips, his abdomen, ran her fingers through his pubic hair, tugging gently. Nan reached down and massaged his balls, stroking his scrotum, then she leaned down and took the head of his hardening cock into her mouth. She sucked him all the way in. He was not fully hard yet and his partly flaccid cock slid down her throat. She pulled back, sucking hard, her hand gripping the base of his cock, encircling it. She went down again and again, taking more and more of him down her throat. Massaging his balls, tugging at them, swirling her tongue around the head of his cock, rimming the head with her tongue, then going down and swallowing him whole.  
Leo’s hips came off the bed with every sucking, pull on his cock. He could barely breath and his heart was pounding so hard he could hear it. “God…Nan, dear god, dear god…FUCK…” He sat up and pulled her up to him and flipped her over on her back. “I have to fuck you. God I need to be in you.”  
In the back of his sex addled mind, he remembered the doctor telling them to be creative, so he didn’t hurt himself. All he wanted to do was get up on his hands and shove his cock into over and over again, but his shoulder and arm wouldn’t take the strain. He grabbed all the pillows on the bed, putting two against the headboard and the other two on the bed just below. “Nan, lay against the headboard and put your butt up on the pillows.” Nan got the idea right away.  
She moved to the head of the bed and rested against the head board. She bunched up the other pillows and raised herself on top. Leo moved between her legs. “Higher, I need you higher.” She took one pillow out and folded it in half and then settled on top. Leo moved up close to her and grabbed the headboard with his good hand. He touched Nan’s face with his right hand, caressing her cheek. He kissed her and looked into her eyes. “Nan. Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you. “  
She answered by kissing him back and reaching down to guide him toward her. Leo felt the head of his cock tease the moist opening to her vagina. He pushed his hips forward slowly. Nan shifted down a bit and he felt his cock slide into her, her heat enveloping him. He stopped, lord knows how but he stopped, letting her feel him, adjust to him, accept him. His legs were trembling with the effort, holding himself still, until she moved again, bucked her hips and he entered her more deeply, the heat of her body, the slick wetness, engulfing his senses, all his being centered in his cock, centered inside of her. He waited, not moving until he felt her move again and he pushed, she cried out and he almost pulled out. “No, stay, it’s okay…oh god its good, oh Leo, Leo…fuck me Leo, let go Leo.”  
Leo slowly pulled back and then thrust forward, thrusting a little harder each time until he couldn’t hold back anymore and he pulled back and drove his cock deep into her, pubic bones mashing together, his balls slapping her ass, he drove into her harder and harder. “Oh god, you are so tight, so hot…Nan…dear god…” She raked her fingers down his back, grasping his hips, urging him to fuck her faster, harder, fuck her, make her come. He was close, oh so close, he bit his lip as he thrust into her, knew he had to wait for her, didn’t know if he could. He reached down between them with his right hand and rubbed his thumb down over her clit, stroking hard...that’s all it took. Nan screamed his name. “Leo, Leo…oh god, Leo…I’m…coming...oh my god…” The spasms of release tore through her vagina, through her body, down her legs, savage waves that gripped Leo and brought him crashing over the precipice with her. He pumped hard twice more and semen burst from him in a hot wave of over whelming sensation. Leo cried out “Nan…dear god, I love you…”  
They melted into each other arms, sliding down onto the bed, arms and legs wrapped, entwined together, two bodies become one. “I love you, Leo,” Nan murmured as she curled into Leo, melted into his heat. Leo gazed into her eyes, brushing his thumb lightly over her swollen lips. “That was amazing...I may not be able to move for a while. Are you okay?”  
“Mmmmmmm…yes.”  
Leo shifted just a bit, making his hip more comfortable, pulled Nan closer still, rested his face on her hand and closed his eyes. “You feel so good,” he whispered before he drifted off to a sated sleep.

 

“If you do not wake up soon, you are going to find my emaciated body, lying here, starved from lack of food.”  
Leo pried open his eyes and found himself staring into a pair of green eyes inches from his face. “What… what the hell are you talking about?”  
“Leo McGarry, I am starving. Wake up. Let’s order something.”  
He tried to bury his head under a pillow but she snatched it away. “Dear god, I have created a monster. Go. Eat. Let me lie here, a broken man…”  
Nan dove in with her fingers and tickled Leo, digging into the most sensitive spot on the sides of his ribs. “Good god, woman, play fair.” He twisted away, laughing as she rolled on the bed with him. She snuggled into his side and wrapped her leg over his. “Leo…you were wonderful, amazing…thank you…for making me feel again.” Leo felt warm tears on his chest and he raised her chin. His own eyes filled with tears as he leaned in to kiss her, chastely, gently, just brushing her lips.  
“Oh Nan, thank you…I…I don’t think…jeez, I am a man of few words when it comes to, ya know personal stuff, it’s just that I feel like a weight has been pried off my soul.”  
“Me too, Leo. I feel like I could fly.”  
Leo kissed her, possessively, passionately. “I love you.”  
“Okay, baby. You said you were hungry?”  
“Famished.”  
“How about take out Chinese from that new place you told me about?”  
“Oh, yeah. Sweet potato spring rolls, sesame tofu and sweet and sour cauliflower.”  
Leo laughed and tried to untangle himself from Nan. “Hold that thought while I get a pen and write this down. We’ll send one of the agents to pick it up.” He made it off the bed and disappeared, naked, into the apartment and came back with a pad of paper and a pencil. “Write it down,” he said as he limped over to the pile of clothes on the floor and dug out his sweatpants. He pulled them on and threw Nan her t-shirt from the floor. She dropped the pad for a second to pull on the shirt, mindful, finally, of the fact that Lewis could come in at any moment.  
“Okay, here it is. I put the address on there. Do you have your phone; I can call it in? Mine is dead.” Leo picked up his phone from the dresser and tossed it to Nan. She called in the order and yelled to Leo in the bathroom. “They said thirty minutes.”  
Leo flushed the toilet, looked in the mirror and tried to fix his hair, but gave up. It stood straight up on the side and he noticed a purple mark on his throat and another on the side of his neck. ‘Jeez, I sure look like I have been having wild sex.’  
He went into the room and grabbed the pad, tore off the top paper and walked to the foyer. He didn’t know what time it was, but he hoped Lewis was still here. He opened the door and looked into the hall. Lewis stepped over, took one look at Leo and raised his eyebrows.  
“Don’t even, Lewis,” Leo grumbled. “Can one of the other agents run over here and pick up this take out order? Nan is ready to start gnawing on the furniture.” Lewis spoke into his mic and Laura Miles stepped into the hall from the stairwell. “Run this down to Baker and have him pick it up, okay. Then resume station.” She nodded and left.  
“Sir, can I do a sweep?”  
“Yeah, sure.” Leo stepped back into the foyer to let Lewis pass. Lewis pulled the sock from the doorknob before he shut the door and tossed it to Leo. “Still need this, sir?”  
“Shut up, Lewis.”  
Lewis walked into the master, chuckling under his breath and saw Nan in t-shirt and panties, trying to straighten up the disheveled room. “Ma’am,” he nodded, averting his eyes, and swept the room, then the closets and bathroom. “Good evening, ma’am,” he said as he left and went into the living room. Leo was in the kitchen pouring tonic into ice filled glasses. Lewis checked out the rest of the apartment.  
“Okay, sir. All clear. I’ll bring in the food when it arrives.”  
“Thank you, Lewis.”  
Nan came into the living room as Lewis left, now wearing silk lounge pants and a long sleeve tee. She brought Leo a fresh sweatshirt and dropped it on the sofa. She took one look at him and went back into the bedroom, then came out holding a sling.  
“Leo, dear, you look like the Hunchback the way you are favoring your shoulder. Come over here and let’s put this on,” she said as she held out the sling.  
“Nan, I don’t…”  
“Move it McGarry. Don’t argue.”  
He glared her, then grinned as she helped him put on the sweatshirt and then let her put the sling around his neck and helped him settle his arm into it. When he straightened and relaxed, he breathed a sigh of relief. “I admit, that does feel better.”  
“Good. Come sit down,” she patted the sofa. Leo sat back against the arm and settled his left leg against the back and left his right foot on the floor until Nan settled in between his legs, then he brought up his right foot onto the sofa. Nan leaned over and got their drinks and the TV remote. Leo thumbed the TV on and they cuddled together watching CNN.  
Lewis walked into the apartment a while later carrying a paper bag. He saw them curled together on the sofa and held up his hand when Nan started to get up. “Stay. I will grab some plates,” he said as he set the bag on the coffee table. “Do you need forks? There are chopsticks in the bag.”  
Leo shook his head. “No forks Lewis,” Nan called back. He came back with two plates, opened the boxes of food and placed them within reach on the table and handed Nan the two sets of chopsticks. “Yell if you need anything.”  
“Thank you, Lewis.”  
Nan put an egg roll on each plate and scooped sesame tofu and cauliflower on to each plate along with a scoop of rice. They ate, finishing all the food, while watching an old Gregory Peck movie on the Movie Channel. By the time the movie was over Leo was nodding off and Nan couldn’t stop yawning. She nudged him awake, “Leo, honey. Time for bed.”  
He squinted at the clock in the kitchen on the wall. “Nan, it’s not even 7:00 yet.”  
“Well, mister, I am exhausted and you have had a busy day. No arguing. Bed.”  
Leo gave her a crooked smirk, “Bed. Are you inviting me to bed?”  
“Yes I am, but you and I are going to sleep.”  
Leo didn’t argue. He was tired, he was sore and he wasn’t sure after their earlier performance that he had anything left in him for tonight. Cuddling up to sleep with Nan sounded like just what he needed. Nan turned out the lights and put the take out cartons into the trash while Leo went to the foyer and told Lewis they were going to bed for the night. He came in to do one more sweep before shift change and wished them both good night.  
Leo stripped and put on a fresh pair of boxers and slipped into bed, resting on a pile of bed pillows. Nan came into the room wearing a hip length loose t-shirt style nighty with a kitten on it. “Sexy, babe,” he growled and held the covers for her. She turned out the light and crawled into the bed and snuggled close to Leo, resting her head on his shoulder. He tucked the soft flannel sheets and thick comforter around her, laid his cheek on her head and in bare minutes they were both asleep.


End file.
